Favorite comebacks/insults in cartoons

In "Goof Troop", Pete comments on how Peg's uncle Bob (a general) drives him "nutso". Goofy then says (to the camera): "Not as long a drive as you might suppose."

That's a good one especially coming from Goofy.
 
This occurred when Joker believed that a small-time thief named Sidney killed Batman:

"But those dreams were dashed by the weaselly little gunsel sitting there in our midst. The cowardly insignificant gonif who probably got lucky when Batman slipped on the slime trail this loser left behind him. This mound of diseased hyena filth who's not fit to lick the dirt from my SPATS!!"

:eek:
 
One of the better moments from the 90's Fantastic Four. In the first season they had a moany landlady who every episode insisted they were public menaces. In one episode, her niece joins Johnny at a gala party the whole team are going to. She insists on tagging along.

"When I heard my niece was going with the likes of you, I didn't know wether to accompany her as a chaperone or throw up"
Ben, barely under his breath: "Ya look like ya did both..." :D
 
I've always loved Goku's comeback in Dragonball Z to all of Freeza's "monkey" taunts, when it's clear his has beating him.

Goku: "Your energy level is decreasing with every blow. In fact, you're not even a challenge to me anymore. It wouldn't be fair for me to keep fighting you. I'm satisfied now. Your pride has been torn to shreds. You've challenged and lost to a fighter who is superior to you and to make it worse, he's just a monkey, right? "
 
Ahh, I loved the Lord Bravery segments. That segment was my favorite.

Another good comeback:

Grandmother: The tea's ready!
Lord Bravery: Then...get it!
Mother: Well, you are up, darling.
Lord Bravery: Oh yes, let me get the tea! I'd hate to see either of you actually have to walk the three feet into this fine, mysterious new world we call the kitchen--you might get lost or attacked by the dishwasher!

and

Lord Bravery: (while intending to save a man trapped in a sewer) Can't you climb out?
Man: If I could climb out, I wouldn't be needing any help, would I?
Lord Bravery: Well, you could at least yell, 'Help, I'm trapped in a sewer!'
Man: What would that have done?!
Lord Bravery: It'd save me a trip.
Man: You think you could get me Superman?
Lord Bravery: Oh, Superman! What do you need with him? I'm a superhero, aren't I?
Man: I don't know, are you?
Lord Bravery: Yes, I told you, I said, 'Fear not, Lord Bravery has arrived!'
Man: Oh...I thought that was a joke!
Lord Bravery: A joke!
Man: Yeah, you know...to keep me from focusing on my horrible pain!
Lord Bravery: Yes, well, it's not a joke!
Man: Good! 'Cause it didn't work!
Lord Bravery: Look, I'm going to throw a rope down to you.
Man: A rope?! I thought you were going to come get me!
Lord Bravery: From the sewer?!
Man: Superman would do it!
Lord Bravery: Well, he's not here!
Man: Could you go get him?
Lord Bravery: Look, just grab onto the rope and I'll pull you up.
Man: Well, maybe you could get those turtle fellows with the bandanas. I don't think they'd mind the stink down here too much--in fact, I think they rather like it!
Lord Bravery: You are a remarkable twit, you know that?
Man: In fact, I think those turtles live in the sewer!
 
From the Peanuts movie, Snoopy Come Home

Peppermint Patty: Chuck, what do you think love is?

Charlie Brown: Well, my dad once told me a story of when he was dating my mother. He parked the car once, and went to open the door for her, but every time he tried to open it, she'd lock it. Then she'd sit there behind the window and just smile and wiggle her nose at him. *makes a funny face* that's what I think love is.

Peppermint Patty: *long awkward pause* ...Sometimes I wonder about you, Chuck.

------

From at Aqua Teen Hunger Force episode, Super Bowl

Meatwad: Yeah, we got braggin' rights this year. Number one!

Master Shake: Who? Who's number one?

Meatwad: *pause* ...I don't know.

Master Shake: Of Course you don't know! Cause you went to a*BLEEP*ing farm, you *BLEEP*ing imbecile! You get back here, you cost me my one chance! I got *BLEEP*ing diabetes and cancer because of you!

Part of what made Master Shake's rant so funny was the sound effects they used to bleep his profanities.
 
While I do like R'as Al Ghul, I've always found it very satisfying to see someone (usually Batman) give him the so-called "Shut up, Hannibal!" treatment. Perhaps because, Al Ghul for all his vast intelligence and charisma, also happens to be a self-righteous nutjob with delusions of grandeur. Below are two examples:

In The Demon's Quest, after Al Ghul has finished telling Batman about his master-plan to use the Lazarus Pits in order to wipe out civilisation (or something like that):

R'as: A magnificent plan, don't you agree?
Bats: Yes, I can see it clearly now for the first time (cut to Al-Ghul looking smug). You are completely out of your mind.

And in Out of the Past:

Bruce: I take it back. You don't cheat death. You whimper in fear of it.
 
I don't know if this counts as an insult, but the ghost's response to Carl, and Carl's response to Frylock amuses me everytime I hear it.

Carl: Okay, so what do I gotta do to make the blood stop?

Ghost of Christmas Past: You must give of yourself to the great ape

Carl: Okay, how much?

Ghost of Christmas Past: SEXUALLY.

Carl: ...Wonderful.

Moments Later..

Frylock: You don't have to move Carl, you could do that other thing the robot said..

Carl: Look, I know it's been a while Fryman, but i'm not about to y'know, get humped by a giant red gorilla in space. No thank you.
 
I love the bit afterwards, where Carl gets elf blood on himself and Frylock invites him to take a shower over at their house:

Carl: "Yeah, that's just what I want to do, get nude in your house."
 
just wanted to add one i loved from the fairly odd parents.

I always loved how dr bender (the evil dentist dude) calls timmy

"bucky the buck toothed tooth boy!"

EDIT: ok so now that i have more time i wanted to add a few more that i remembered.

im surprised that no one's mentioned the greatest futurama insult of all time courtesy of bender firstly:

"bite my shiny metal ass"

another one i loved from the show transformers beast wars comes from a time when waspinator has...something happen to him.

Black Arachnia: "he's wacko!"

waspinator: "not wacko, Wonko! WONKO THE SANE!"
 
In an episode of "Denver the Last Dinosaur", when a guy who captured Denver spots Denver's teenage friends, he says: "It's those TWO-LEGGED MOSQUITOES!"
:lol::lol::lol:
 
I recently recall this from House of Mouse:

Hades: I want a decaf please!
Gaston: No one orders decaf like Gaston!
Hades: I... fail to see the humor in that one.

Timon: *uses spoon as mirror to check his teeth*
Gaston: No one looks their reflection on a spoon like Gaston!
Timon: Actually, no one cares about the opinion of Gaston.

It's mostly the delivery that gets me.
 
Whenever Gizmo of teen titans insults a member of the titans calling theme pittsnifers blowholes & Cubert Farnsworth of futurama insults a member of the crew

they both have great comeback lines I can't think of a good one
 
The only one I can think of off the top of my head is a scene from The Oblongs after one of the Debbies gives a genealogy report showing that her family were descendants of Cinderella.

Teacher: But isn't Cinderella's a storybook...
Debbie: YOU'RE a storybook!

EDIT: Just thought of another one from the "Coffins and Cradles" episode of Home Movies while Linda is giving birth and she and Brendan are screaming at each other:

Brendan: KNOCK KNOCK!!!!
Linda: WHO'S THERE!!!!!!!!!!
Brendan: [bleep] YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Linda: [bleep] YOU WHO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then they exchange F-bombs at the top of their lungs as we go the next scene (one of which I think the censors missed). One of the most hilarious bits in the whole series.
 
The Simpsons episode "Million Dollar Maybe", Lisa gets the Retirement Castle Zii (Wii parody) and the castle's nurses destroy it becuase energetic seniors means hard work for them. Lisa is outrages...

Lisa: I can't believe you would rob them of their fun.
Nurse: They should have had their fun before they came here!

And in "Duck! Rabbit! Duck!"

Daffy: You're a dirty dog.
Bugs: And you are a dirty skunk!
Daffy: I'm a dirty skunk? I'M A DIRTY SKUNK?!?!?
(Bugs holds "Dirty Skunk Season" sign and Elmer shoots Daffy)
 
Actually Mordecai said that, but yeah. It was still funny.

How about one of the most famous (or at least most repeated) comeback from Regular Show?

Muscle Man: MY MOM!
 
I remember the episode of King of the Hill where Peggy put hormones in Hanks coffee and Dale talks about another one of his conspiracy theories in the alley. I don't remember what they exactly said, but Hank points out every flaw in his theories leaving Dale speechless.
 
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