What is a good kicker for the end of my essay?

J

Jenn

New member
So far, the conclusion is:
King Arthur became a great king. The main reason he became such a great king is because of all the lessons Merlyn taught him as a child. He ran his kingdom with strong intelligence.

I'm having severe writer's block and would like some help. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.
 
First of all, you cannot say someone runs something with strong intelligence; actually, you could scrap that entire conclusion and say: "King Arthur was an intelligent king as a result of the lessons that Merlyn taught him as a child; Arthur ran his kingdom with vigilance and strong values."
 
something like this:

Many people fear the deception inherent in magic, but King Arthur saw the potential in it. He learned from a young age that people both feared and respected Merlin, and he learned how to channel the mystery. That was Merlin's true power. Everyone loves mystery, and yearn for someone to create it.

The King realized that perception, even when false, may be more important than reality. Focusing on how he appeared to both his enemies and friends, Arthur shaped his kingdom with strong intelligence.
 
First of all, you cannot say someone runs something with strong intelligence; actually, you could scrap that entire conclusion and say: "King Arthur was an intelligent king as a result of the lessons that Merlyn taught him as a child; Arthur ran his kingdom with vigilance and strong values."
 
Sounds kiddish.

The aforementioned qualities and traits corroborate why King Arthur is known as a (different choice of adj than great) King today. Because Merlyn taught him well from childhood, Arthur was able to run his kingdom with strong intelligence and vigor.

don't know your grade level but your sentences need variety. SAT words.
 
First of all, you cannot say someone runs something with strong intelligence; actually, you could scrap that entire conclusion and say: "King Arthur was an intelligent king as a result of the lessons that Merlyn taught him as a child; Arthur ran his kingdom with vigilance and strong values."
 
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