J
jason park
Guest
To start off, I am Korean and 21. My girlfriend is 23, her brother, 24, and his girlfriend, 25. They are also Korean. Two days ago I hit my girlfriend's older brother because her older brother and she got into an heated argument which he shoved her head forcefully to the side. Her glasses were knocked off and had he pushed her harder, could have hit her head on an adjacent counter top. Seeing this, I raced over, shoved him back and punched him once on the cheek. The fight didn't go on due to both our girlfriends' pleading and holding us back. However, words were exchanged, including myself stating, "that you are not a man if you hit a woman, especially your younger sister." I also threatened him if he ever laid a hand on her again. His response was to try hitting me. The situation ended there with our girlfriends forcing us to different rooms.
My girlfriend's brother's girlfriend then proceeded to call friends and family to get their input on the situation. Upon hearing her version of the story, and calling my girlfriend to confirm the actions, they all agreed that it was wrong of me to punch him because he is the older brother. Their reasoning is that I should have stood aside and show respect for him because that's how Korean culture is. I had no place in stepping in to defend my girl. In my defense, I believe that if one is going to argue with "that's just how Korean culture is," argument, that one should be open to all aspects of the culture. In Korean culture (and many other cultures as well), the oldest male is usually the one elected to be the role model for their younger siblings. This means that they would put down their goals and lay their pride aside to protect their brothers and sisters at all costs. I have never seen my girlfriend's brother do anything for her, whereas she maintains the family's finances and does innumerable favors for her brother. How is this in line with the reasoning of "Korean culture?"
In his defense, his girlfriend has told my girlfriend that she should be smarter and just step down when they get into an argument. If she gets pushed around and stepped on, she obviously did something on her own to provoke her brother's temper. In all, she stated that, "women should just take it." Is this fair?
I'm tired of those who use their cultural background as a excuse for overlooking their moral values. My question is this: Was I wrong for attacking my girl's brother in opposition of his "Korean" treatment of her?
My girlfriend's brother's girlfriend then proceeded to call friends and family to get their input on the situation. Upon hearing her version of the story, and calling my girlfriend to confirm the actions, they all agreed that it was wrong of me to punch him because he is the older brother. Their reasoning is that I should have stood aside and show respect for him because that's how Korean culture is. I had no place in stepping in to defend my girl. In my defense, I believe that if one is going to argue with "that's just how Korean culture is," argument, that one should be open to all aspects of the culture. In Korean culture (and many other cultures as well), the oldest male is usually the one elected to be the role model for their younger siblings. This means that they would put down their goals and lay their pride aside to protect their brothers and sisters at all costs. I have never seen my girlfriend's brother do anything for her, whereas she maintains the family's finances and does innumerable favors for her brother. How is this in line with the reasoning of "Korean culture?"
In his defense, his girlfriend has told my girlfriend that she should be smarter and just step down when they get into an argument. If she gets pushed around and stepped on, she obviously did something on her own to provoke her brother's temper. In all, she stated that, "women should just take it." Is this fair?
I'm tired of those who use their cultural background as a excuse for overlooking their moral values. My question is this: Was I wrong for attacking my girl's brother in opposition of his "Korean" treatment of her?