...tasks-what disorder? My wife had become very paranoid that I was committing adultery. I never did, and for the first year and a half tried to calm the suspicions, I even went as far as recording my whereabouts by taping myself running errands. After time the suspicions did not go away but became worse. I realized that the issue wasn't a real concern, that there was something else going on. I tried to get her to seek help but she refused, so I told her we could go through marriage counseling. I contacted the counselor prior to going and let him know what was happening and he agreed to help.
The sessions were comprised of basically going through all of the suspicions, at least the first 4. At the end of the last session the counselor asked my wife if he were a judge, did she have any evidence that any of the accusations were true- she said no. He then asked how sure if a scale of 1-10 was used, was she that I was cheating, she said a 6-8, from there the counselor confronted her. He suggested that maybe the ideas that I was unfaithful were the product of her mind spinning things, that she may have a problem to address. She broke down, but not in the way that you see on TV, she became very angry and accused me of more stuff. That was the last session we attended.
A few weeks later, when she refused to seek anymore help and things hadn't gotten better-actually worse, I asked to end the marriage. I hadn't spoken to the counselor after the last session and was concerned because he never made a diagnosis or at least an idea of what he thought the issue was. We have a young son together so I called the counselor to make sure that our son was safe with my wife. The counselor said that he didn't think my son was in any immediate danger, but he then asked me same questions. He asked, "Do you think she can pay bills on her own? I responded kind of in a "what do you mean" reply, but realized that all real adult tasks were being performed by me and always had been. He then said, "I mean, do you think she can open a checking account and ....." I told him that there wasn't any reason that I would think she couldn't. He replied, "I have some ideas of what's going on with her, I don't need to se you again but I have to see her before she's on her own."
After that I initiated the split and from there things have gotten really crazy. She's accused me of everything you can think of and more. The son that I was trying to protect is out of my custody until I can disprove all of this stuff, I had no idea what the courts and advocates do when someone makes these type of allegations. To try and prove there was some issues going on, that I tried to get help, we tried to get the counselor records. He says that he is unable to produce because of doctor patient privilege, which I understand. The records are going to be produced but the process is a hassle. Marriage counseling records are unique as both parties are patients, thus denying me the records is equally ethically questionable as him providing them without her consent. Basically a lot of stuff for the attorneys to go through.
My question is, what sort of thing could he have been talking about with the questions of her being able to do everyday sort of adult stuff? Why did he need to have an appointment to address his diagnosis with her? Any ideas to the type of mental disorder he had in mind. The sessions were him asking her about the suspicions and then about her childhood. She pretty much said that she wasn't close to family, hated her father and hadn't seen him since she was 2, and when asked about emotional attachments as an adult- she indicated that she had a few boyfriends but hadn't really gotten attached. During the sessions I might have spoken for 10-20 minutes total in 4 hours, there was no couples therapy involved- just questions abut suspicions, emotional attachments, early childhood, and finally confrontation. Any ideas, thank you.
The sessions were comprised of basically going through all of the suspicions, at least the first 4. At the end of the last session the counselor asked my wife if he were a judge, did she have any evidence that any of the accusations were true- she said no. He then asked how sure if a scale of 1-10 was used, was she that I was cheating, she said a 6-8, from there the counselor confronted her. He suggested that maybe the ideas that I was unfaithful were the product of her mind spinning things, that she may have a problem to address. She broke down, but not in the way that you see on TV, she became very angry and accused me of more stuff. That was the last session we attended.
A few weeks later, when she refused to seek anymore help and things hadn't gotten better-actually worse, I asked to end the marriage. I hadn't spoken to the counselor after the last session and was concerned because he never made a diagnosis or at least an idea of what he thought the issue was. We have a young son together so I called the counselor to make sure that our son was safe with my wife. The counselor said that he didn't think my son was in any immediate danger, but he then asked me same questions. He asked, "Do you think she can pay bills on her own? I responded kind of in a "what do you mean" reply, but realized that all real adult tasks were being performed by me and always had been. He then said, "I mean, do you think she can open a checking account and ....." I told him that there wasn't any reason that I would think she couldn't. He replied, "I have some ideas of what's going on with her, I don't need to se you again but I have to see her before she's on her own."
After that I initiated the split and from there things have gotten really crazy. She's accused me of everything you can think of and more. The son that I was trying to protect is out of my custody until I can disprove all of this stuff, I had no idea what the courts and advocates do when someone makes these type of allegations. To try and prove there was some issues going on, that I tried to get help, we tried to get the counselor records. He says that he is unable to produce because of doctor patient privilege, which I understand. The records are going to be produced but the process is a hassle. Marriage counseling records are unique as both parties are patients, thus denying me the records is equally ethically questionable as him providing them without her consent. Basically a lot of stuff for the attorneys to go through.
My question is, what sort of thing could he have been talking about with the questions of her being able to do everyday sort of adult stuff? Why did he need to have an appointment to address his diagnosis with her? Any ideas to the type of mental disorder he had in mind. The sessions were him asking her about the suspicions and then about her childhood. She pretty much said that she wasn't close to family, hated her father and hadn't seen him since she was 2, and when asked about emotional attachments as an adult- she indicated that she had a few boyfriends but hadn't really gotten attached. During the sessions I might have spoken for 10-20 minutes total in 4 hours, there was no couples therapy involved- just questions abut suspicions, emotional attachments, early childhood, and finally confrontation. Any ideas, thank you.