I've slain the dragon!!

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NotPerky

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Denon, yours was the first post I looked for when I logged back on tonight after being gone for the past few days. I am SO happy for you! You sound wonderful...so dramatically improved from the end of last week. Now get outta here! :-) Just kidding, but it is great that you have other activities to keep you busy....non-addiction-related, that is!
 
Denon, I knew you could do it!!!! Congrats to you, my friend. I think we all finally realize how strong we are when we finally "slay the dragon!" I am so happy for you and I know how you feel right now. That feeling of accomplishment doesn't go away.

Again, congrats on your new life!!! TaCot
 
Congratualations on getting though detox. Your analogy of detox being like the slaying of a dragon is really good.

I am in agreement with Lou, however. The warning of the need for an aftercare plan is fair. How do I know this? Because I have relapsed many times without a plan. Aftercare with recovering addicts will teach addicts how to live a life without drugs. Many will detox; very few will stay clean. Statistically, 90 percent of all addicts relapse. Relpase is part of the disease of addiction. If we relapse, we are not in recovery. We are in active addiction.

One important lesson we learn in NA is that our disease is incurable and fatal. The most that we can hope for is to put it in remission, like chemotherapy to cancer. We learn to treat our disease in NA with the spiritual principles built into the 12 steps.

However you choose to stay clean is up to you. NA or AA are good aftercare plans and worthy of consideration.

mk
 
Denon my Man!!!!

I KNEW YOU WOULD!!!! I am so proud of you!!! Your determination was never failing and for that.. BE PROUD!

I too still crave but.... we are strong you and me... we will keep fighting the good fight!

I just wanted to say congrats! Stick around would you? I think you and your experience can be of great help to many others!

Sending you a warm congrats hug!
~Secrets
 
Hey Big D Hope all is well, I am doing good. went to church today and a meeting tiday WOW!!! I had to share we had 4 people celebrating 3 years of sobriety and 1 woman who had 20 years of sobriety. I tt her after the meeting and it was wonderful. But, best of all she told me to call her, I felt like I won the lottery. Someone who is that successful wants me to call her. this just goes to show you what a blessing this program is. I love her so much she has so much wisdom and is just the happiest person I know. It just made my day, and I wanted to share this with you. Stay with the winners this is for everyone even if you only have 1 day or 20 were all the same..... take care love you guys..

Lori
 
Congrats on attending your meeting. One day last week I was at a very low point, very high craving level and annoying withdrawals and I noticed that there was an NA meeting in 1/2 hour at a church downtown. I through on a jacket, grabbed my keys and out the door I went. I finally found the church (it was huge), saw a meeting hall with a bunch of people it in, went in and asked if it was an NA meeting. The lady looked at me like I was nuts, didn't know what an NA meeting was and said it was a prayer meeting in a mocking voice.

So, I walked around the church, drove around back and after about 15 minutes I finally found the right room. I was determined to find it and attend my first NA meeting that night.

(long pause)

No one was there! Nobody showed up other than me. I was all by myself feeling a little stupid after walking around a church trying all of the doors with a hooded jacket on wondering when they were going to call the police on me. I hurriedly left when I heard police sirens in the distance.

I guess there is a morale to this story... (you know us writers are always looking how to turn things around)... I think it was my connivance to realize, "You got here alone, you can do it on your own." (of course, I couldn't have done it w/o the help of the wonderful people on this board!!)

When I get into that state of high craving, withdrawals (yes, I'm starting to have them again) and looking for help, I need to suck it up and work my way through them - it will make me stronger in the end the harder I fight. I always have you to lean on when I need help as well.

One day, when the time is right, I Will attend an NA meeting to see what it is like. Last week, I guess, wasn't the right time.
 
D I am so sorry to hear about that OMG. Dang I wish I was in AZ cuz I would certainly take you to a meeting. I also attend aa meeting even though some of them don't like addicts but to each their own I have found some great alkie's that I love and accept me for who I am and love me for me. But I am so glad your higher power was at work and stopped you from using. That right there shows us he is hard at work. But for sure I will always be here. I promise to check the boarRAB more, I pop in and out so much.

If you call the NA hotline they can give u an up to date meeting list. Some lists are out dated. But I wanted to share with you in the beginning you are on a pink cloud and you can go along period of time without a craving. Then Blam it will hit you like a ton of bricks. Thats why I make sure I have a list of all my meetings. You can get this by calling the NA hotline.

D. you are my online friend I care about you deeply and I think about you often. You are always in my prayers. I am volunteering to answer phones for NA so what happen to you never happens to another person who is looking for help. You are very lucky to have the support of your family and love ones. But, remeraber you always have us on this board. Isn't it funny that we have never met but, I care about you and you will always have a place in my heart. that is the blessing of this board. Just stay until the miracle happens, their is one definitely coming down the pipe for you:wave: When things get tough just take it 1 minute at a time thats how I did it. Before you know it you will have a full day then a week and before you know it you will have a year. I promise. Take care. Please give your wife our love and tell her we are so proud of her for standing by you the way she has. Take care. Lori
 
Hi Denon

What a wonderful job you have done getting off the opiates! It really is tough to work through those withdrawals, but you have done it with style.

You know, Denon, I think your head has been in the right place all along. The decision to get off the meRAB was made and you followed through in every way. Even when you feared you could not do it at home, you pushed forward and made arrangements for a detox facility. I took much, much longer to taper than you and I had to actually get off two different kinRAB of meRAB (opiates and then benzos). When I did finally finish, I had no cravings at all. During the tapers, I did have physical symptoms from drops in dosages, but I never had a desire to take more than I was scheduled to and when it was done, it was done. I was just so glad to finish it all.


I hope you stay with us for a while and continue to share. You are a role model of determination.

God Bless
reach
 
I plan on staying around, but my life has become suddenly extremely busy with a new adventure that I am pursuing. I have SO much more energy!!! Plus, I put the editors on hold for the five magazines I proofread for and edit when I wasn't sure if I was going to go into detox or not. I let them know today I was available again and I almost immediately received an article to re-write ASAP for a February issue.

I still have the achy muscles, especially at night, but the cravings were much less today. The Oxy keeps telling my brain that the pain in my lower back would go away with just one little pill. The pain in my finger tips when I type (very annoying) I wouldn't feel anymore. The things I keep dropping out of my left hand would go away - just one little pill will make it all better. But, I know better. I can continue on with my life with these little annoyances and work w/o out the Oxy controlling me!

Thank you everyone for supporting me and helping me through the crisis.
 
I did get the info off of the NA web site about teh meeting. Maybe they need to update their web site?

I do know someone to call and I'll call him tomorrow. He works for the detox I almost checked into and he attenRAB meeting everyday. I can get a better location from him. He helped my so much talking to him on the phone. I do need that extra help and encouragement right now. My mind is still being controlled by the drug and I'm still having some w/d's on-and-off. My legs are shaking right now as I'm sitting here. :-(
 
The dragon raised it's head to deal its fatal blow, but I was stronger, with more determination and faith in my abilities and sank my sword to the hilt in its hideous neck. A twist, a turn, a thrust and it's life strewn forth in an angry gush of finality. A deafening roar emitted - its last dying howl, as it plummeted to the ground in a crashing thud. It looked into my eyes and bore deep into my soul and a smile came to its face knowing that I had defeated him. It accepted its fate, laid its head down and died.

I have slain the dragon! It might quiver a little, but I feel that I have finally won!!

I am Day 3, cold turkey, no withdrawals, only one slight bout of craving yesterday that I worked through. I had to take some Tylenol also yesterday for the achy muscles and each day I have used less and less Valium to take the edge off. I told the in-patient detox center that I felt guilty for not coming in after all of the work they did getting my insurance worked out, but I'm sure they would rather see me kill this dragon on my own. NEVER GIVE UP!!! Don't let your drug convince you otherwise!

I won't say that I'm completely drug-free until I reach Day 7. That is when I cross the line from having an Opiate Dependency to being a Recovered Opiate Addict. Then, I will begin my new journey to remain drug free for the rest of my life. Excuse me while I wipe the tears from my eyes...

Thank you all for helping me on this journey. I seriously could NOT have accomplished this without your love, prayers and support!! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
 
Just trying to get this post back up to the top of the boarRAB......everyone should read it.
 
Hey again!

SounRAB like you are REALLY busy!!!! It also sounRAB like you are a very successful person being you proof read & edit 5 magazines!! That is great! I probably read a couple of them :) It also made me laugh because I thought... "with all my typo's over the last few months... it's probably driving him crazy to see all the mistakes!" Too funny!!!

I am glad the w/d are way less for you! What a relief! That was a tough time but you made it thru it!!!! I hope the cravings stay away for you. They are miserable to deal with and I would not wish them on anyone!

I am glad you are going to stick around and post from time to time!!! However, it's understandable that life gets busy and we can't always post as often as we would maybe like to.

Good luck on your new adventure!!!! I am sure you will do great at whatever it is!!!

Your in my thoughts!
~Secrets
 
Denon, What a post!!!!! It gave me goose bumps!!!! I think a lot of people here would like to "claim your post"!!!! You have written down in worRAB exactly how I feel after 35 days off.

I am so proud of you, it is a terrible thing to go though, but....I think it makes us stronger in a lot of ways. What a battle eh!!! (sorry I am Canadian, had to get the "eh" out there)!!!!

I am sure your family are very proud of you and will always be there to support you. Your wife must feel so much better also. I know my husband was so glad when I stopped shaking and crying. He didn't know what to do for me and they go through this hell as much as us and they feel just as good afterwarRAB as we do.

I am sure (like me) you will have good days and bad but....nothing compared to what you have just been through, and you "have done it" and I feel so good for you. What an accomplishment and you did it on your own!!!!!!

Good Job Denon ;););)

Take Care
Lyn :angel:
 
Yes, I realize that this is a brand new journey that I am now on. Getting over the withdrawals does not mean that I am over the addiction. I will never be over the addiction. I pray that I never re-injury my neck or back where I end up having to go back on the pain pills. I will tell my doctor that I recovered from an opiate dependence and ask for other choses. I also plan on attending NA meetings - I can learn from them, as I have learned from everyone on this forum.

I feel that I am stronger since I was able to do it on my own. With all of the failures that I had in the recent weeks, I kept trying, I kept pushing forward, until I can finally say that I made it. If you are having difficulty with your drug dependence - remeraber this - you can do it also. Failure makes you stronger by showing you what didn't work - it tells you to try something different to reach your goal. Nothing comes easy and you will have to pay a price. Pain let's you know that you are still alive and that you have something to work towarRAB to make the pain go away.

I have had a fantastic happening in my life recently that has helped me in my desperate time, which couldn't have happened at a better time. I believe in serendipity - things happen for a reason. Some call it fate, divine intervention, luck, fortune, chance, opportunity, revelation... Whatever you call it, it has opened a new life for me. This happening occurred so I can begin a new adventure to bring people together and bring joy to their lives. (plus, I get to be creative and write!!! woohoo!!)

I will remain on the forum providing assistance where I can and hope I can see other people achieve their goals and become drug free as I have. Thank you everyone helping me get to where I am now. I also want to thank my wife and family for their support. Their help was unbelievable! Surround yourself with good people!!

I am drug free!
 
Hey D,

I am so proud of you for holdind on the way you have. I couldnt believe your story about going to a metting and then no one was there.. What a bummer but you found great perspective about it... Good for you friend.

I am sorry the w/d are still bothering you. That is terrible. I hope it gets better soon.
I just wanted to check in with you and tell you that you are in my thoughts! Hope things get better!
 
Good job...and you did it on your own! You are to be commended. Don't let your guard down.........I have confidence that with everything that you have gone through these past days, you won't be wanting to repeat them again.

Congrats again!
 
Thanks for your encouragement. You were a big help getting me through the tough times. You and the others can congratulate yourselves!!! I have such a positive attitude right now. My wife and the one substance abuse councilor that I talked with both say I sound like a new person. I've lost that depressed sound to my voice and I have a new positive ring to it.

Yes, I have mental cravings all the time now. The physical ones are now gone, but the mental ones have taken over. I had my wife hide all of the Oxy just so I wouldn't be tempted again.
 
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