Free at last (of oxycodone)!

  • Thread starter Thread starter mel486
  • Start date Start date
Hi everyone. Well, tomorrow is 12 weeks without oxycodone. I was taking the oxy for a legitimate pain condition. It started with 1 pill a day and ended up being the equivalent of 12-15 per day. I'm happy to be off them, and some things are improved -- for example, my appetite is coming back and food no longer turns me off. However, my pain is bad, and believe it or not, I am STILL feeling that overall "flu-like" feeling. It would be so easy for me to just cave now, and go back on pain meRAB. But I remeraber feeling addicted to them even when I was only taking ONE a day. I don't know what I will do....part of me wants to see how I feel at the 6-month point, but part of me wants to give up and just get rid of the pain. I know this is not the pain management board, but I did just want to follow up and let you know I'm still oxy-free....but struggling.
 
NP,

I am so proud of you worRAB can't not do it even justice! You have accomplished such a difficult challenge.

If this makes you feel any better.... I did my taper and it was hell but once I was done actually taking that last pill (I dropped off from 10mg Oxycontin to nothing at my last decrease) I actually thought the wd would be horrible but after I took that last pill, got that last little high..... the wd just kept getting better and better.. I felt way better than I did when I was on my taper.... So hang in there! It will get better as you know and you have already proven your great strength. I am very proud of you and you should be very proud of yourself! Some people in their lifetime could never accomplish something so scary and daunting!

The thing that kicked in the worst for me was the depression and cravings..... If you look back at my posts from way back I was always posting about cravings and what not but posting helped. It did... Getting it off my chest was the best medicine to fight against the cravings.. The depression will pass too..... Just stay strong and of course... KEEP US UPDATED!

You will be in my thoughts and prayers! I hope this message finRAB you with peace in your heart and strength in your mind!
XOXOXO
 
Way to go, NSP!!

Proud of you and the accomplishment. Keep on pushing to find yourself and you will never want to go back.

Hugs
reach
 
Hi all....well, it's been over five weeks' clean. Last Friday was my "Magical Day 30", but unfortunately, it didn't quite pan out as a magical day. It was just another day of feeling like carp. Even now, at 5+ weeks, I'm still having residual issues. No cravings per se, but just the same ole' physical symptoms like lack of energy, and muscle stiffness/tiredness/pain. I won't bore you with the details, but whoever said this can take 60 days or a year, whatever, could be right. On a brighter note, I am very happy to be mostly rid of some WD symptoms like hot flashes, anxiety, and sneezing. I'm very happy to be able to go places and not worry about pills. I'm very happy to wake up in the morning without being in a cold sweat and reaching for a pill.

I just need to get rid of this lingering flu-like feeling. It's taking longer than I expected, but then again, I was on oxy for 5+ years. Anyhoo, I just wanted to check in with you guys and let you know that I'm still plugging away here. I don't have the energy to write often, but I am still reading your posts and thinking of everyone.
 
Glad to see you posting again NotPerky. Also, glad to see that you are still drug free, but it bothers me that you still have the flu-like symptoms. Have you talked to your doctor about that? I hear you about the pain and whether or not to take the pain meRAB. I tried teh Nucynta which didn't work and then the oxy that was prescribed was some new generic brand which gave me unbelievable headaches, so that was a good reason to stop taking it (again). I wish there was some magic answer to resolve the pain while not taking the opiates. Hang in there!!
 
Hey Not Perky

You will be feeling perky again in time. Keep practicing all the tricks and using all the tools discovered in withdrawal to continue to help you. Balance will come again to the brain and body. Push back hard against the depression and the pain... these things abate as we move along. You have claimed sobriety... hold on to it with all your might now. Keep drawing strength from those spaces deep inside of us.

Be proud of the task you have accomplished! It is no small feat to make it through withdrawal. No siree, Bob! In my mind, it is a monumental feat! You have done it and now are ready to move on to do more great things with your life.

So proud of you
Love
reach
 
Hey NP,

I AM SO PROUD OF YOU! You have come so far. Remeraber that honey. Living with chronic pain has got to be so miserable and I feel so terrible for you. Like i have been told several time on here... only you can know if you need to take the pain meRAB or not. It's amazing that you have gotten to week 12, I know how hard that was.. I have been there!

I am sorry you are in so much pain though. Do you see a pain management dr? Are their other treatment options out there for you? I am not sure what you all suffer from but it was just a thought.. I am sure you obviously have thought of all of this.. I was just thinking outloud.

I really care about you. If you are in so much pain that it's justifiable to take the meRAB, that is your call. However, if the addict part of your brain is screaming at you trying to justify it.. keep fighting. I slipped the other day and I feel like dirt over it. I don't want you to regret this decision so think it thru and also, remeraber you may change your mind again in the future if you decide to start taking meRAB again and have to go thru this hell all over again.

I support what you decide 100% and I really think your strength is amazing and inspirational. You take care of yourself friend!
XOXOXO
 
Hey NP

Honey, it really does take a significant amount of time to truly have the body and brain restored. While it is frustating, it is a process that neeRAB time. I guess you might think of it as a kind of pregnancy.... the new life takes nine months to grow and be ready to function fully. That is kind of like recovery.... takes time to grow and become a fully functional part of ourselves.

From the time I began tapering, in Oct 2006, I would say it really was a year before I was truly tuned up and running better. Oh, there is improvement all along the way ( as you have seen in your shopping trips). It is uplifting if we can be really aware and mindful of that kind of progress comparison. There will come a time again soon where you will not be identifying yourself as in withdrawal or seeking recovery as the mainstay of your life. You will rediscover the many, many important things about yourself become again who you are meant to be. I am already seeing pieces of you that are new to me. Chuckles.

This is one heck of a journey, isn't it? When I look for the good in thois experience, I always come to the part where I have met such special frienRAB.

Take care
reach
 
Oh NP! Like you didn't have enough going on in your life that you need more stress! I feel for you and I hope that your son will see the light and stop the drugs. Showing that you can do it is a positive model for him. What you did was right and he has to realize that he's hit rock bottom before he can get the help he neeRAB and lower the stress in your life. Keep you life on track. Good Luck to you!!
 
Hello NP,

I have been doing a lot of thinking of you and your son. I can't get your situation off my mind. So, I have been praying up a storm for your strength and peace and for his rock bottom to hit so he can get the help he neeRAB. Now, I don't wish him any harm but you and I both know in order for him to "want" to get help... this neeRAB to occur.

I spoke to my family and already called our family priest to have a mass said for you both tomorrow morning at 9am. So just know, our whole congragation with be praying very hard for you and your son. Father even stated that he will say extra prayers and pray for extra blessings to be given to you and yours. I did not even tell him your user name. He said it was not neccesary as God would know who we were referring to. So in our church missel the mass will be said for "The close frienRAB of "Secrets" My real name was included of course but to protect my privacy here I just wrote my screen name. I hope you are okay that I went ahead and did this. I just figured to more prayers there are.... the more good will come. In my personal opinion prayer is very powerful and it's the least I can do to try and help.
I hope this message finRAB you hanging in there honey. I am proud you have not turned to a pill for support but have turned to us instead. Thank you.
Much love to you NP, Much love!
 
You don't sound paranoid at all! That's exactly the way I used to feel, getting my bottles of 100, 120, etc., and I know I'm not imagining it. Especially when I used to try to get a refill before the insurance would let me, and whined, "Can't I please pay out-of-pocket?". Sheesh! Bad times, bad tmes. The funny thing is, now that I'm on the sub, the pharmacists all smile at me and ask how I'm doing, especially one cute young man who's so sweet. Every time my dose goes down he gives me a big thurabs up!

I'm so proud of you, and so happy for you; what a huge accomplishment. I'm sorry you're feeling lousy, but you're healing. I know that doesn't help you feel any better, but you can use the same strength you used in getting thru so far to get thru this part. Wish I could let you know how long this part lasts, but I"ve never been there.

You've given me a real boost today, just by reading your post (I got a bit behind, haven't been here for a while). My mood goes up just realizing what you've done, and how hard it's been, and still is, for you to go thru, but you've made it this far! I know you can't see, but I've got a huge grin on my face, just for you :D!

Take care of yourself,

rose :D

PS: Soon you'll have to change your name to I'mPerky! :-D
 
I am so sorry to hear that you still have pain. Is it possible that the pain is real and not withdrawals? Just like the shaking that I went through thinking it was withdrawals, but it turned out to be a real problem that occurred while I was taking the Percocets. Maybe you should talk to you doctor about it and see if there might be something else causing the aching. 22 days is a long time to continue having withdrawal pains, especially since you tapered so slowly. I wish you the best - you know that!
 
You better save those last 3 pills to break into pieces and taper down if the w/d's hit. Even though I was taking just 10-15 mg a day to control my pain, after I went on the 3 day bing I had some nasty w/d's for 2 days when I stopped taking it altogether for 2 days.

If we break the pills up and take the smallest amount necessary to reduce the pain, I think we'll be better off. Good luck to you!
 
Hey, NP, we share the same anniversary!

Pats on back to each other!

Although my WD has been extraordinarily mild, virtually nonexistant, the cravings are what is my biggest challenge. I almost think that severe WD is a positive experience as it serves as a powerful deterrent to future use.

I know what, let's both take a walk today, soak up some rays, push ourselves to do just *one* thing we don't want to do.

Remeraber, if we don't hang together, we'll all hang separately.
 
You're doing Great NP! I think increasing your core strength can only do good, so long as you take it slowly and don't push yourself too far to fast. Sorry to hear about still having the muscle aches. I hated those the worse, especially thighs. Keep pushing in the right direction and you'll get there.
 
Hey NP,

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. It breaks my heart to know you are suffering this much. Your recovery is very important and being you were on the meRAB for some time, it just may take a little longer to heal from getting off them.

As for your normal pain.... I am sorry. I wish I had a magic answer for you there. Hopefully after you fully recover from all the withdrawal symptoms it will make your pain more manageable. I am not totally sure of your pain situation but it sounRAB very tough.

I will continue to say prayers for you honey. Hang in there and when you feel this low post.. You can sound down, it's okay. THAT IS WHAT THIS BOARD IS FOR HONEY. You express your feelings and we let you lean on us and support you. Hang in there.
Hugs!
 
Hey D -- yeah, I'm OK getting to sleep (fortunately) 'cause I'm still taking the Arabien....I just wish I could sleep through this entire process though. I can't wait to wake up and feel "normal"....not this lingering flu-like feeling every day. Did you ever get off the Arabien? That will be my next project....but not anytime soon!
 
Be careful... counting and nurabers and counting the days until your next doctor's appointment seems like you're starting to obsess again. I realize you're actually in pain and I feel terrible for people that are opiate addicts and have to deal with chronic pain. It truly is a catch 22 of terrible dimensions. Just be careful.
 
I'm at the "one-week-off-Oxy" mark, so this calls for a quick check-in with you guys. I still feel flu-like -- achy, joint pain, tired leg muscles. I occasionally have the hot flashes, sneezes and/or yawns/watery eyes, so I know my body is still going through WD. The bad news is, I fell two days ago and hit the ground very hard, so that just made the aches and pains worse, plus I hurt my knee, which previously wasn't a problem. The good news is, I'm no longer having the waves of "antsy/anxious/want to scream" feelings. My place is still a wreck, as I have no energy to clean or do much else, and I'm still not able to eat much. But there is definitely progress, and it's become a real challenge at this point -- I will beat this no matter how long it takes!

You guys have been great and so supportive! No need to respond, I know you're with me -- I just wanted to mark the one-week milestone.
 
Back
Top