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Lugar........Great Job...I am so proud of you, you are doing so well, stay strong!!!!!!

Mike......I feel so bad for you!!!! You have gone through so much!!!!! If only you knew how good you would feel...."WHEN" you get through this.....You will have your life back, I promise you. Stay strong.......and listen to "Secrets". She might be younger than a lot of us on here, but she has the experience after what she has gone through and she is our "Resident Mom"!!!!! Good job and great advice Secrets (as usual).

Take care all and I will be thinking of each and every one of you today.

Hugs

Lyn
 
Mike - One day at a time - that's all you can do!! Just make it through the day and start over again tomorrow.
 
Mike

Hi again, it is Lyn in Michigan. I was on Prosac for years as I am in Chronic, Neck Shoulder and Head Pain. I know you have read my story, if not go into "Suboxone Withdrawl". Anyway being depressed and anxious from being in pain since the year 2000 is not easy. I thought Prosac helped a lot until my doc switched me recently to "Cyrabalta" as "Lyrica" didn't work for me. I have Fibromyalgia and couldn't take Lyrica. They are using Cyrabalta also for pain and Fibro. and also I am on a large dose of Neuronton for Nerve Pain. I think maybe you should talk to your doc about changing your "anti depressant" or adding one. I was on several anti depressants at one time!!!! Maybe if you went to a New Doctor he could help you in a different way than your present doc can by suggesting new options.
This is just a thought and I want to help you in any way I can. Post anytime and I will answer any of your questions (if I can help).

Take care

AngelinMichigan Lyn
 
Well, I am glad to hear you say you will be okay! And you are right... Just steer clear of the booze so there is no temptation.. We do all have bad days from time to time.. I hope your weekend is better for you!! I really do!!!

Just know, even though I am not on here.. I will still be praying..... and thinking about all my frienRAB who are fighting the good fight right along side of me!
XOXOX
 
Thank you Lyn for checking on me. I am starting to sleep well which really helps in my sobriety. I realize negative things are going to happen but I feel like I'm getting stronger each day & hopefully I'll react responsibly instead of hiding in a bottle or popping a pill. Mike
 
Thanks to all that have responded. Lugar, what do you mean by GP ? I sure hope you make it. I'm pulling for you. The responses help with the lonliness. It's a real paradox. Right now I so want to get out of my head but I know how terrible the outcome will be if I do drink. I'm just so tired of being alone. I know I sound like a baby. I know there's so many with real problems worse than what I have going on. I know I'm responsible for this. I don't know if I could handle the withdrawals again. The last were the worst. Sitting here by myself shaking & sick. Having to crawal around the house because I can't walk. A horrible experience. Even with all that a big part of me wants to escape into the bottle. It's so insane. I know I need to get out & try to be around people but the depression is paralizing me. My family & best frienRAB are deceased. I'm trying my best to be strong but I'm hanging on by a thread.Lugar, we have to make it. You're in my thoughts. Thank You, Mike
 
Sorry mate...GP is British for Doctor. I keep forgetting that this posts all over the place!! Listen,its good to vent and no, I dont think your a 'baby' and we all have times where self pity eats us up. Sometimes I wonder if the hardest part about trying to be clean is that we have to re-learn how to live and be ourselves. I mean,who am I really nowadays if you take away all the drugs/alcohol?This is what we each need to find out for ourselves,but a place like this sure helps with good ole fashioned support. Mike you have got through the day thus far so keep hanging on to that thread.Try not to give in.
Im here too - 20hrs and counting. Rooting for you.
 
Hey Again,

Now before I say anything.. just know I say it respectfully and out of concern for you.....

Here's what I think.... Your counselor could be giving you a GREAT opportunity. You live alone... your "things" can go into storage and you would be able to have 6 months focusing on yourself. You would not be lonely... You would be taking care of yourself and learning to live a new way. I know that you said you have been to a few but maybe they were not long enough programs. The depression sounRAB like it is the key to your drinking.. Maybe they need to first and foremost try to find a way to treat that and go from there.. Time to ask for a med change or something and let them know that what they are giving you is not cutting it. You HAVE to stick up for yourself.

I mean no offense but what do you have going for you now? You are home, feeling lonely, fighting cravings.... It's not like you would be leaving paradise and entering hell.... I really think it would be a good idea for you... I hate to hear of you being lonely and I think this could be the solution...

What are your thoughts??? I really am worried about you friend!
 
Hi Secrets, Thanks for thinking of me. For some reason I'm having a real hard time today. The depression is pretty bad but haven't resorted to alcohol. Kind of hanging by a thread. Same story for me as I have trouble living in my own skin. I imagine my eating disorder is contributing to this. Can't keep anything down. When I'm still my mind goes to some very negative events from my past. I have to stay on top of this or I will relapse. Your checking on me really helps. Don't feel as lonely. How are things with you today ? I sincerely hope you're ok. I wish Lugar would check in. I'm kind of worried. I hope you have a great weekend. Love, Mike
 
Hi everyone, I'm a 51 yrs. old male alcoholic. After an extended period of sobriety, I moved to a new town about a year ago. Turned out to be a bad move as I fell into a deep depression from lonliness & started binge drinking. Some months ago I took a bad fall while drunk & severely injured my right, dominant arm. I can't lift it now. I saw two different orthopedic Doctors & had all the usual tests that determined I had nerve damage. Both Doctors said there is nothing they can do. Now I've developed something called Neuropathy from the drinking. Both feet & hanRAB are nurab. I can barely even write as my right hand has started to deform. The Doctors said I should file for disability. I've had several people tell me there's no way I'll get it. I don't know what to do. Living off savings & running out of money. This isn't self-pity as I did it to myself. The pain is intolerable, physical & mental. I end up drinking to not think about it. By no means do I say this justifies my drinking. It's been difficult but I haven't drank in a week. Each binge makes the nurabness & weakness worse. I'm starting to lose hope. Thanks for listening to me whine & vent. Mike
 
Hey Mike,

How are you holding up buddy.... Like I said in my post a couple of hours ago.. I am so PROUD of you!

Hope you are doing okay!
 
Welcome Mike!

I am sorry to hear about the situation you are in. SounRAB like you have been thru a lot and are still going thru a lot.

I guess the first thing that came to mind for me when reading your post was that since the lonliness you face spurred the drinking then if we take care of that issue... the drinking will be easier to keep at bay?? So.... Since you are in an area that you may not know a lot of people maybe you would want to join AA or something... It would be a way to help with you addiction AND meet frienRAB!

I really hope things start looking up for you and CONGRATS on not drinking for a week! That is great! Stick around!! We will keep you company!
~Secrets
 
Heu Mike,

GREAT JOB staying strong!!!! I am BEYOND proud of you. What you are facing is a battle fit for a warrior and that is what you are becoming! Think of the rest of us as your soldiers.... We are here to help in any way we can... Post and talk thru all of this. I know what you mean by white knuckling it... I spent many of days and nights like that but you CAN stay strong. Just remeraber... YOU are in control of you.. NOT some BOTTLE.... YOU.

You are a good person who deserves to be broken free from these chains and we are going to help you as much as we can to get there.... I really think it would be important for you to go out and seek out an AA meeting.. I think it would do you a world of good because it sounRAB as if you are very lonely and this may give you a little pep in your step. Remeraber... we are here for you and you are no longer alone.

Keep posting updates! I will keep saying prayers for your strength!!!!!
~Secrets
 
crocheting;
Thank you for responding. This sure helps. You too Angel & great job on 36 days ! I was able to sleep w/ the help of a med. ( Amitriptylin ). It's very hard to rest because of the nerve damage ( Neuropathy ). This is day # 10 for me hopefully. I'm able to eat but can't keep it down. This is going to be another long day of fighting the compulsion to drink or binge & purge. I just can't stand to be in my own head. I hope I make it. Thanks to all.
 
My feet are real cold right now, it made me think of your sufferings Mike. How are you doing so far today? I was real worried about you having no heat, its been on my mind constantly. Mike.....is there anyway you could get a good quality space heater? My 80 year. Old mom has two, and they work great. Mom has a old fashion floor heater that works, and the space heater's she moves from bedroom to den where ever she is sitting. It would be perfect to keep your hanRAB and feet toasty, until you can fix your heating system. I just can't stop thinking of you with no heat, it is just not right! How is everything else going? I hope your doing good right now, let me know? I will be here all weekend to keep you company, post ANYTIME you want to. We are all in this together! I know you will miss secrets this weekend, I will too. What do you usually do to pass the time these days? Can't wait to hear from you :) crocheting
 
Thanks so much Lyn. I'm so thankful I made through the weekend. So nice waking up w/ a clear head. I hope we all make it. Tx for your support !
 
Hi Crocheting, Thank you so much. It's been a rough day but no alcohol. However the eating problem has a hold on me. I wish I could be a " regular " person. I usually don't have the food thing during the day but when the evening comes it's a real problem. The days are real long. I'm fortunate to have you, Secrets,&the other good people on this board to talk to or I might not make it. As long as I don't pick up that first drink I'll be alright. I hope you're well & have a great weekend. I'll be in touch. Love, Mike
 
Ok.....I feel better to know your ok. You didn't mention your heater, were you able to get it fixed? I am so sorry you have had a rough day. Mike...I know exactly what you mean about "being a regular person"! I know your also in a lot of emotional pain, I know that pain to well. It gets old real quick. At my worst moments of not even wanting to leave the house, and when I did I felt like everyone around knew my pain like and I couldn't wait to get back home. Days of watching the clock hoping time would pass quickly. Askin myself several times a day "why me this is *#*#*# up". Even being around my family, I still felt alone. Mike....the depression can get worst, I think maybe you need to think about talking to your doctor about maybe giving something for the depression. For me I started wellbutrin several years ago, wow I don't suffer daily with that overwhelming feeling anymore. I am so proud of you, your such a strong person. YES we are going to make it! I am under lots of stress right now, so it has been hard to ween any faster on my norco to 6 per day. I know I am going to have to do better real soon. This is probably the biggest battle of my life, next to when I quit drinking 10 yrs ago. Thank God we all have eachother. I will be checking the boarRAB till late tonight, don't hesitate to post if you need to! Talk to you soon.
Crocheting
 
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