While I'm far from pro-fanservice, I'd be lying if I said I was completely against the equivalent for the female audience. I am an emo bishie lover, after all So I suppose I stand more on the side of letting it slide as long as it's equal opportunity.
Code Geass was a good example of this: there was healthy amounts of fanservice in both seasons but there was fanservice for both sides of the spectrum. The guys got Kallen in her pilot suit while we girls got Suzaku in his. Kallen got a shower scene but so did Lelouch, even if hers was longer and more revealing than his. I know the female fan is in the minority so more fanservice will pander to the guys, so as long as there is some aimed in my direction, I'll care less about the former. I don't especially like it, but I try to be realistic and as non-hypocritical as possible.
What I do object to, however, is the female characters who exist solely to be objects of fanservice. That and fanservice for the sake of fanservice. That is objectifying women and a concept that I abhor. I'm not a militant feminist, but I still consider myself somewhat feminist in my beliefs and that objectification is where I draw the line.
Women are obviously misused and misrepresented in both American and Japanese entertainment. It's something you tend to get accustomed to over time. That's probably not a good thing, but it's what happens. Realistically, I know a lot of anime is sexist--just like plenty of American entertainment I enjoy--but that doesn't stop me from enjoying it. If I were to only watch shows that were "non-sexist" so to speak, my choices would be severely limited and I'd be missing out on things I'd likely otherwise enjoy. However, certain things like the token fanservice characters or the constant damsel in distress will keep me from watching a series.
A series that I was really impressed with on the female character aspect was Daughter of Twenty Faces. Even in the 1930s setting, Chiko is a strong lead that is smart and can take care of herself. Haruka and Tome are also strong women in their own rights, though have fewer instances to display it than Chiko. There is relatively little fanservice on the whole and I would say Chiko could be a role model heroine because of the strength of character she displays throughout.