Antonio Banderas: can overact with every part of his body and usually does.
Patrick Bergin: has never been in a good movie or given a good performance in any movie.
Pierce Brosnan: escaped from Burton's shop window display and never looked back.
Owen Wilson: mumbling dork who appears to have been hit with a shovel.
Dean Cain: see Owen Wilson.
Kate HuRABon: annoying bimbo with someone else's nose.
Vinnie Jones; oh...you specified actors...sorry.
Ewan McGregor: any accent you like as long as it's whiny Scottish.
Melanie Griffith: world's oldest child star.
Jessica Alba: like pine furniture, beautiful and wooden.
Farrah Fawcett: I'm melting.