You can't fall asleep smoking - move or rehab

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Secrets1983

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I also wanted to say, please know that you can come here and we will give you nothing but support. Yes, we are addicts but most of us feel terrible for what we have done and are working towarRAB recovery or are in recovery!

So, please feel very welcomed here!
 
I like it so much when you call me mom...is that silly or what?

mydaughtersmom
 
Taking the first steps towarRAB trying to get my daughter to believe that she is addicted to opiates is unbelievably difficult. My daughter recently moved home after 6 years with a drug boyfriend. I knew there was stuff going on while she was out of the house but I was only allowed to see her when she wanted. All other times I was kept at arms distance. Most of the time she did not answer my calls and it was rare for her to answer her door. She has lost contact with all frienRAB and family.
When she moved home (broke up with boyfriend) she was very pleasant to be around. She joined us for dinner and talked to us. We could not detect any symptoms of the drug use that we expected. We were relieved and now just wanted her to get a job for now and then think about school too.
Then the money started disappearing. First any cash that was in my purse, then a "borrowed" debit card, then the checks and credit carRAB. My husband, (her step father) has an office at home so his business checks were available also. She admitted to taking the money and said it was to pay a towing and impound bill for a car she got caught driving without a license. Surly there would have been a ticket as well and she has not been able to produce the bills.
We had the founder of P.A.I.N. come to the house and talk to her. We decided that because she would not admit to using, that she needed to assure us that she was not using. She was given until Monday to make the decision to test or leave and come back when she was ready for help. Sunday morning when I went in her room, I found (not for the first time) that she had fallen asleep with a lit cigarette and burned the bedding, this time more sever that the previous. I also found a bag with drugs, pipes, foil and other stuff. I told her that we no longer needed a drug test but she now had to decide between staying and getting help or leaving until she was ready.
I pray that she calls soon for help...I don't know where she is and I am so scared. Please tell me that I am doing the right thing! Please pray for recovery for her and reassurance that I am doing the right thing. Advise welcome.
 
it sounRAB like she knows she neeRAB help which is a good sign. and that she knows there is help for her when she is ready. from personal expierence here with my husband sometimes showing the love and letting them know ur there helps. but also to keep ur sanity you have to take some control of yourself and stand behind what you beleive in.
 
Hello. Your definitely doing the right thing. Unfortunately, with almost all drug addictions, she wont quit until she decides that she wants to. Theres really nothing anyone can say that will make her quit, she has to do it on her own. I also think she may have more than just an opiate problem. Falling asleep with a cigarette is definitely a sign of opiate use, but what form of opiate she is using makes a difference. Pain killers alone are very difficult to quit, but if she is using heroine, the withdrawal sickness will be much worse. If you found pipes and foil in her room, it sounRAB like shes either smoking marijuana, or shes smoking heroine. Hope for the marijuana.

One way for her to realize that she neeRAB to change is for her to completely run out of money. If she has access to any of your money, cut her off, completely. Many addicts give up there addictions simply because they just cant afford it anymore.

You may want to have the pipe and foil tested, and find out what exactly your daughter is using. This can help you figure out what kind of help she neeRAB.
 
mydaughtersmom,
I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope that you can get to the bottom of why it seems that he lied to you! He told you that he would have contact with your daughter on a daily bases & then it went from 2-3. Thats not right! If he wasnt going to live up to his side of the agreement than he never should have promised to do so in the first place! So now you have no contact with your daughter? You must be feeling so let down. I'm so sorry. I will continue with the prayers for you & your daughter. As hard as it may be right now, please try to remain positive. You truely are a wonderful mother & you deserve much credit. But i'm wondering now, since this interventionist broke his promise to you as to what he was going to do, will you now try to contact your daughter on your own? Wow this has to be so very hard for you. Please hang in there & let us know what, if anything we can do to help. Please keep us posted. Take care. Will be praying for you & for daughter. Also, i'm just wondering , since there is two sides to every story, might your daughter have gotten upset with him & told him to bug off? Maybe that could be his reason for not keeping his word? I dont know, but i'd sure be interested to find out what happened & why he obviously lied to you. This really stinks because it seemed as tho everything were moving along in a positive light until now. Its always something! But please, dig deep within yourself mom & try to pull out the positive! I will be praying for you mom & daughter. Stay strong, i know you can do it because from reading your worRAB i can tell that you are a very strong, determined woman & i know that you will get to the bottom of this! (((((Hugs)))))
 
Hello again!

I am just checking in with you!!! I have been thinking and praying for you and yours!

Studey, THANK YOU FOR SHARING THAT STORY! It had me in tears! I know that story will help others in many different ways!

I hope everything is going okay with you Mom. I really wish that you didn't feel so helpless right now! It just breaks my heart!!!

Please keep us posted and know we are here for you and will keep you in our hearts and in our prayers!
XOXOXOXOX
 
I am new here, but been an addict for years. I beleive you are doing the right thing. Hitting the bottom will be good for her. Love can be shown in all ways, tough love is the only way with an addict. How old is she and does she have chidren? Soboxone works for me and it could be a good choice for her. Good luck and stay strong.
 
mydaughtersmom,
Hi, i'm just checking in with you to see how you're doing. Wanted to let you know that i'll keep you in my prayers, daughter also. Please dont give up hope! Stay strong! You're not alone & we are all here for you. Take care & God bless.
 
mydaughtersmom...Hi, how have you been? We haven't heard from you in awhile. I hope that all is ok & that your daughter is ok. Is daughter making any progress? Has anything changed? Have you had any contact with her? Sorry about all the questions, just been thinking about the two of you. I'm keeping you in my thoughts & prayers. Take care & God bless you both.
 
Hello mom,

I am so sorry for what you are going through right now with your daughter and I want to tell you that you are WITHOUT QUESTION doing the right thing, and I think you know it. Addiction is a cunning and baffling disease. While you love your daughter, the best thing you can do is let her know you will not help her kill herself. Also, you must protect yourself and your husband. She has shown by her behavior that she has no respect for anyone right now. The good news is, people do recover, and as the last poster indicated correctly.... not until they are ready. Don't let her back home unless she is willing to get help and abide by your rules while in the house.

Bless you for not giving up on her and I will pray for you and your daughter. Things can get better and they do, but not unless some serious change on her part is put forth.

I don't usually post on this board but somehow I came across your post and I will be checking back to see how things are going.

Keep the faith

Bullymom:wave:
 
not won't quit...just not doing it when i'm around and when i'm not he does... been a on going battle with it now... am not as strong as i used to be...am tired of the roller coaster at this point.. i don't have anyone else to really suport my side on this and he has plenty of 'frienRAB' to suport hiim in doing it.. am getting tired of fighting it... but this is my fight.. thanx for listening tho..lol.. your daughter will come around your showing her you care and i'm sure she doesn't want to stay in this lifestyle.. i'll keep you both in my prayers..
 
Secrets~

How special you are! Your post truly touched me this morning. I don't know if putting real names is allowed here but here we go...my name is Tami and my daughter is Briana. I don't know that I am able to express my gratitude on this site for the support I seek and am given on an almost daily basis.

Thank you in advance for the Mass you are planning on Sunday, please let me know what time the Mass is.

God Bless you and Your Mom

mydaughtersmom
 
Good morning Secrets~
I am glad to hear that you are doing better, I check on your posts daily. You have a great many fans on this board - the support has to help.
Sad to report that there is no change in my situation with my daughter. I have texted her a couple of times since the intervention, not expecting a reply but just putting it out there that I love her and will be there for her when she is ready. The inventionist told me not to contact her but I don't trust him much these days so don't feel too bad not to be following his advise.
I will continue to pray for your healing as I know that you and your mom will continue to pray for my daughter. One of my daily prayers is "Please God let today be the day"
Please pray this with me.

Stay strong Secrets, you are an example to all!

mydaughtersmom
 
Thank you so much for your kind worRAB. If the prayers work just to get her there, I feel that we will be successful....please pray for this.

Thank you again.

mydaughtersmom
 
Hey Mom!

Putting real name son here is okay but that is up to each individual user if they feel comfortable doing so.



It's our pleasure to have a Mass said for you and your daughter. Every bit helps and I feel so strongly for your situation that I will do anything in my power to help and my Mom feels the same way because she just can't imagine the pain you feel everyday.

Blessings to you Mom! May you find some peace today!
Hugs!
 
I have read your worRAB..And you do have strength,,But if I was you,,And I am not, I would go to al annon and learn all you can about the drug adiccted, Now I am not addicted, I am a mom, that not to long ago, Walked your very scary shoes for about 6 years and I would not want to be in them shoes anytime soon..My son, Stole everything , he could from me from checks, money , my very old collectable money, I thought there for awhile he would sell me if he could, to get high.. His choice , ( I thank was crack )..But I thank he was using anything,,alcohol..But I did see him at a crack house..I cried, at him, prayed, I begged, I did everything..Finnally when he got sent to prison for once again my checks,,My husband, Called police, then we canceled it,, then the state took over..All he had to do , is be clean every week, but he couldn't do that So off to Prison, not jail..Where he sat for 18 months,,Where I didn't visit him, I made it very clear, I would not visit any of my children in prison of there doing..I wrote, But not visit..Well, This is what it took to clean him up..He has been clean now for 7 years, married with 3 beautiful children, Just had a little girl last month, and named her after me..So yes, life does gets better for you and will also for your daughter,,Tough love,,And know that you mean it..He was my first born..I never imagined him a drug addict, let alone, an inmate..I hope my story helps you in some way,, cause I feel and know what you are going through, so so very much..If she thinks you have a life without her and you can go ( you make her beleive this and you make yourselve beleive this ) One thing I learned when I took nursing, is teenagers are very selfish and really it is there job to be,,But ...It is only a stage , They can not be that way forever,,There is problems that happens when they are that way after tha age of 18/19 ..They have to grow up, if they like it or not !! Stay tough, go to al annon,,You will be ammazed...of the information.and strentgh you will get, Hugs, Cindy

Ps, If you ever need anything, I will be here for you,
 
I need so much more info from you..will you please answer my questions? I dont want to pry but may need to. The situation in my mind is now more desperate than ever.

Mydaughtersmom
 
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