Why Me?

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billfisher01

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Unfortunatly I am here once again for help of a different sort.

A year ago I was active in the Bowel board because I was having surgery. That went very well and everyone was very helpfull. The bad part? it seems I have very quickly become dependent on perscription pain pills...At first I loved the feeling to be honest...but after awhile I could not get the same high and just began taking more and more, It all started because I liked the stuff they were giving me in the hospital and wanted that feeling agai, I was sent home with Percs and enjoyed that. As time passed I found myself taking more and more pain pills, Oxy- IR Was one of my favorites when I could get them , for the past 4 months however I have been taking exclusivly Oxycontin tablets in 20mg strength, I found a doctor who willingy gives me a months supply at a time , I told him I have chronic back pain etc and showed him my MRI reports and he just writes them...Anyway I started with taking 2 a day and now I am up to 10 a day, 5 in the morning and 5 in the late afternoon, I prefer to crush the pills up and swallow them that way.

I realized I have a serious problem and there is no way to quit alone, I tried and cant make it one day...So On my wifes proding, I went to a clinic the other day and they are going to start me on a suboxone program tuesday, I am very upset at myself for letting this take control of me like it did, and I was always a strong person, I love my family and need to stop now..

The doctor at the clinic said I need to be in full withdrawels when I go on tuesday so they can dose me in the office and see what amount I need..I plan on taking the 8 pills I have left tommorow and thats that, I need to be without any pills from mondaty on..

Can someone tell what how this process goes and what I can expect?

Thank you
 
BIllfischer,


I am glad to hear that you are taking the steps that are necesary for your recovery. I became addicted to oxycontin in a similar fashion, I had never had a history of drug addiction and then I had a few injuries and surgery was necesary and after the first dose of pain medication I was in love.

Do not feel discouraged with yourself and feel that you are weak becasue of this addiction that has formed. This does not mean that you are a weak person or a morally absent person. Pain pill adiction is very common, a lot more common than you may think. If you give yourself about 24 hours before they introduce you to your first dose of suboxone I am sure you will be in full withdrawl by then. With the current dose of opiates that you are on it may not even take that long, you will know for sure when you are begining withdrawl.

You will find that the suboxone works great. After your first dose you will lose any withdrawl symptoms that you were feeling within 10 to 15 minutes. I recomend that you follow your doctors treatment very strictly. When I began my suboxone treatment I listened to some things and disregarded other things, well this only lead me to relapsing a few times before I bought into everything. One of the things that I disregarded at first and I now have bought into big time is working out. If you go back and read some of my previous posts you will see my feelings on this. I finally began to work out about 2 months ago and I must say I feel great. Rarely do I have cravings anymore and anytime I feel a craving creeping up on me I hit the treadmill and it passes. Over the course of the last year I have tapered from 8mg of suboxone a day to .5mg a day currently. I credit excersise with making the last few mg of taper a lot easier than it would have been, I hve heard that is the hardest part of a suboxone taper....but you dont have to worry about that yet.

I will wrap this up by simply congratulating you again and to sum things up my biggest advice to you is to follow your doctors orders completely and to work some type of excersise routine into your daily life. good luck and please post any more questions you may have and keep us posted with your progress.
 
Funny you mention exercise, I have noticed among lots of other things that My energy level has went tp ZERO..I am just not motavated to do much of anything and I used to be extremely active in my life? is this an effect of pills also? I seem to be very content just laying on a couch all the time ? I am only 42 and like I said was very active.

I hope my life returns to normal and I am putting my faith in the Suboxone. This is a terrible vicious problem that really grabs you from left field and does not let go..

I have got so obsessed that I acually count my pills every day even though I know how many are in there!

Well, Like I said, I hope this can be put behind me and stay behind me!
 
Goodluck Billfisher,

SounRAB like great advice from pineye. From someone who has been through what you are about to do.

I also want to congratulate you on realizing that you have a problem and wanting to get help. Even if it does take a little prodding from the wife. LOL

I have been prodded myself a few times. I became addicted to oxycodone and hydrocodone after a car accident. I fell in love quickly and fell hard. It has taken me places I never thought I would go; figuratively and litterally. Like you, I was a hard working upstanding person who loved his family and was very active and involved in life.

The pillz definately zap your energy and motivation and leave you laying on the sidelines of life.

This is my second and hopefully final bout with them. I kicked them for about 2 years until I reinjured my back a few months ago and thought I was strong enough to take them for the pain only. haha Didn't get very far with that plan.

Today is 72 hours without the pillz and am starting to feel better, more a part of reality. Its kindve a rollercoaster ride coming off for me but know it must be done to keep wife and life. (not sure why the wives aren't impressed with us laying on the couch all day)

I think I will try to mix in the excercise like pingeye suggested next. Goodluck, it sounRAB like you are on the right path.

Be Well
-Proshot
 
Just checking in billfisher to see how you are making it through the day. I know you said you would be off the pills starting today. Hope you are making it ok.

Take Care
-proshot
 
Hello all , here is an update..Well, I had a difficult couple of days being off the pills waiting for my appointment with the Suboxone dac, My system needed to be free of opioiRAB before I could start.

I went into the office feeling extremely agitated, fairly sick all over and just misrable...My mood was not very good either . The doctor did an evaluation to see what stage of withdrawel I was in. During the whole process they were extremely nice and did everything to make me comfortable. After the Doctors assesment, he phoned in a script for the suboxone, 8mg pills. I then drove to the pharmacy to pick them up. When I returned the doctor showed me the way to take it under my tounge etc and had me take a half a pill.

He left me in a nice room with a TV etc..He also left me two bottles of water and said its important to drink plenty of fluiRAB. I waited about a half hour, he came in and checked my heart rate and asked me how I felt, I told him not a whole lot different.....He said I should feel something in the next 15 minutes and left the room again.About 20 minutes later I did infact start to feel better, my mood elevated, my aches started to fade etc and I was was very happy,He had me take the other half of the pill and we waited the same amount of time...After this time, I felt tremendous ..almost giddy at how all the withdrawel symptoms just vanished ...I was amazed...I cannot say I was "high" at all just very normal and content and this may sound funny but I also had a real sense of Clarity which is the best way to descibe it.

I was then sent home and instructed to take another half before bed...I did not go to sleep till 2:30 am! I was just full of energy and very happy that these pills worked so well..( He did tell me that this may happen and I would feel energized for the first couple nights)

I was told to take another half upon waking in the morning and then another half around 11ish and I was to call him at 2pm to tel him how I was doing.well that was about 2 hours ago, I have not taken anymore yet and really feel very good indeed! I am simply amazed, I have ZERO craving at all for the Oxy's and just cant understand that...Just a few days ago they ruled my life and now you could put the bottle in front of me and I could just walk away!

My question and fear now is , did I just "substitue" one problem for another? Its to early to tell but right now I feel tremendous...Its a strange feeling on these suboxones, not really a High but a pleasentness and contentment..The doctor explained to me that many people go though this honeymoon phaze with this drug at first and it will taper down in a couple weeks, He said there is no timetable as to when I come off them and we take it one day at a time, I thank god I got help. I am to call the doctor everyday for the first week, and submit to urine tests randomly.

I hope these are the miracle they seem to be so far!

Bill
 
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