Why am I this way??

  • Thread starter Thread starter gigi11
  • Start date Start date
G

gigi11

Guest
I have a nice life and I should never complain but for some reason I am never satisfied and this causes many panic attacks plus anxiety. I homeschool my kiRAB and I am a stay home mom. I just feel there is something missing in my life or something bad is going to happen. I worry so much over nothing. I worry that everyone else has a more exciting life than I do. I am very sensitive if anyone complains about where I live. I live in a rural area but I have a nice home. My step son decided to live with us this past year because he was not getting along with his mom and his grades dropped. He made honor roll and did really well while living here in the past year. Now he wants to go back and he told his mom he hated it here. I was so offended because what more could a kid ask for - Swimming pool, video games, etc. he said he missed his mom but the real reason was we have rules here and there are no rules with his mom. I still feel offended and having alot of anxiety over it. Then my husband's sister is moving here from New york and we helped her look for an apartment but she said if I lived where you do I want slit my wrist. I felt terrible after that. I like where I live and when people say that to me I feel awful. I worry so much that I have a horrible life. I just wish I could relax and not worry about what people think. How can I do that?
 
Gigi,

Was there anything significant that happened to you before you began to have anxiety? Have you struggled with this a long time?

Some people are more susceptible to anxiety than others. Often, it is the result of perhaps the way they have been treated previously, a traumatic experience, or can be triggered by depression (they can come hand in hand.)

I want to assure you, as you're probably feeling, that you are not crazy. When i dealt with my anxiety issues, I felt as though I was. Felt like I didn't know what was wrong with me and why I had to worry so much.

Over time I learned that the way you view yourself in anxiety is so very different from the way others see you. The anxiety places these doubts in your head, these worries, these superimposed thoughts of your own views-- making it seem as though that's what others think, even though it's just a reflection of how you feel about yourself.

There is help and support for you here, and I strongly advocate speaking to an anxiety counselor to help you. It is a big step, but it is a step worth taking, because you are so worth it. Your life and your happiness is worth it.

Hope it all turns out well for you, and hang in there.

Bright
 
It all started after my divorce 13 years ago and I saw a therapist and got help but it was like a band aid. I have to fix my thoughts so they don't go out of control like that. Like right now I feel bad my kiRAB are growing up and what am i going to do in the future.
 
Hi,
Its seems to me you are trying to hard to live an ideal life, you should be happy with yourself and not worry about other peoples opinions. Not everyone will agree with you in life including your step son, you should be satisfied with putting him back on track and be pleased with yourself and what you accomplished, maybe he feels he neeRAB to move on etc, whatever the case he will eventually appreciate what you did for him. Everyone leaRAB a different life style and I believe that should be respected, altough I dont have to agree with it, and I dont expect anyone to agree with mine...Maybe you are also anxious because altough you seem to have a perfect life , as you said you are not happy, maybe you should do something for yourself, see what you want from life instead of always worrying about others. Do something crazy make a list of things you wanted to do when you where younger and never got to do it....Look outside of the box ...Anxiety is caused by things we know are wrong or need to change about ourselfs or our lifes, but are to scared to change it .....
Sorry about being so straight forward but thats what I think helps, I wish you the best of luck and stop stressing...
 
Thank you that gives me more insight. Your right I do need to make a list of things I need to do in life. My monthly has alot to do with it too - I feel I am going through the change at a early change. It is like my hormones do a big dip. Then I snap out of it. Like right now I am thinking "oh no, my kiRAB are growing so fast, they are going to leave in about 9 years" How do get those depressing thoughts out of your mind. It is like I don't want to live in my current house when my kiRAB leave because there will be too many memories. What does everyone do when they get depressed? I try to read a book or paint.
 
I go to the gym, have a nice sauna or steam room, sit with people I know, have a hot bath, go running, painting why not thats good, you should also do some breathing excersise......keep your mind off it, when you get anxious except the feeling for what it is, and don t let it take control....Live day by day and don t expect the worse you don t know what might happen tommorow let alone in nine years....And you are probably afraid to be alone, but I am sure you have raised great kiRAB and your kiRAB will repay you in the future, I wish you the best
 
Back
Top