Jessie the lost soul
New member
could be more then one the one that makes me laugh the most gets ten points..............
whats the funnist side acheing breath taking joke you have evr and i mean evr heard....?
- Thread starter Jessie the lost soul
- Start date
Jake buys a farm and when he's exploring his land he discovers a large bean-stalk that has a sign at the foot of it reading "CLIMB TO SUCCESS". Jake begins to climb the bean-stalk, after about half an hour of climbing he encounters another sign reading "500 more yards to success". Jake continues to climb the stalk & meets another sign that reads "just 200 more yards to success". Eventually Jake reaches the top of the bean-stalk where he meets a big black guy holding his c0ck in his hand and says "Hi i'm Ces"
kay.
There was this really really famous and georgious restaurent, and a guy went there.
But the foods were way too expensive, so he just ordered a soup.
but he needed to go to potty. He was afraid that since the prices for the food were so expensive, someone would eat up the soup while he was gone.
So he got a brilliant idea and wrote a note saying " I spitted here" on the soup dish.
and he came back from the potty, and guess wht???/
there was another writing beneath his writing....
"I spitted too"
LOL!!! ROTFL!!HAHa
There was this really really famous and georgious restaurent, and a guy went there.
But the foods were way too expensive, so he just ordered a soup.
but he needed to go to potty. He was afraid that since the prices for the food were so expensive, someone would eat up the soup while he was gone.
So he got a brilliant idea and wrote a note saying " I spitted here" on the soup dish.
and he came back from the potty, and guess wht???/
there was another writing beneath his writing....
"I spitted too"
LOL!!! ROTFL!!HAHa
dont call me wave
New member
Supposedly, these are actual advertisements that have appeared in papers across the country.
Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.
Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.
Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy.
Great Dames for sale.
Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
If you think you've seen everything in Paris, visit the Pere Lachasis Cemetery. It boasts such immortals as Moliere, Jean de la Fontain, and Chopin.
Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.
Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.
Stock up and save. Limit: one.
We build bodies that last a lifetime.
For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
Man, honest. Will take anything.
Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required.
Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
UsedCars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
Modular Sofas. Only $299. For rest or fore play.
Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.
Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred.
Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.
Holcross pullets. Starting to lay Betty Clayton, Granite 5-6204.
Illiterate? Write today for free helpWanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
And now, the Superstore--unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.
Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.
Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.
Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy.
Great Dames for sale.
Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
If you think you've seen everything in Paris, visit the Pere Lachasis Cemetery. It boasts such immortals as Moliere, Jean de la Fontain, and Chopin.
Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.
Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.
Stock up and save. Limit: one.
We build bodies that last a lifetime.
For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
Man, honest. Will take anything.
Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required.
Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
UsedCars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
Modular Sofas. Only $299. For rest or fore play.
Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.
Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred.
Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.
Holcross pullets. Starting to lay Betty Clayton, Granite 5-6204.
Illiterate? Write today for free helpWanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
And now, the Superstore--unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.
Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
Jodiiekiins =)
New member
Well its not really a joke
but it was so funny!!!
Was playing rounders and had no idea what to do.. got the ball and didnt know what to do...shouted (what do i do) and they said - "throw the damn ball!" so i threw it in the air and caught it
HAHAHA
Person One: Now...answer this question.
Why can't x (diagram is shown) get to y?
Person two: Theres an elephant in the way
Person one: What is an offence you can cause with the (hockey) stick when playing hockey?
Person Two: I dunno, ask it yourself
rofl! thats so random
but it was so funny!!!
Was playing rounders and had no idea what to do.. got the ball and didnt know what to do...shouted (what do i do) and they said - "throw the damn ball!" so i threw it in the air and caught it
HAHAHA
Person One: Now...answer this question.
Why can't x (diagram is shown) get to y?
Person two: Theres an elephant in the way
Person one: What is an offence you can cause with the (hockey) stick when playing hockey?
Person Two: I dunno, ask it yourself
rofl! thats so random
D
daiyainamifflin
Guest
these r funny!
CuteZ random girl XO
New member
I dont wanna go home 
I WANNA GO TO YOUR HOME @!!!!!! WAAAAAA 
poop
(you need 2 people to do this)
person1 i wanna show you something very specical,
Person 2 okay
person 1 (points at a bunch of rocks) dat one
person 2(points at diffrent rocks) that one?
person 1 NO NO NONONONONO YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG (points at same rocks) dat one
I WANNA GO TO YOUR HOME @!!!!!! WAAAAAA poop(you need 2 people to do this)
person1 i wanna show you something very specical,
Person 2 okay
person 1 (points at a bunch of rocks) dat one
person 2(points at diffrent rocks) that one?
person 1 NO NO NONONONONO YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG (points at same rocks) dat one