After about 6 months of this, I still haven't found an answer.
I know I could go to a psychiatrist, but frankly I don't have that much money.
Anyways,
-Obsession with death, looking at it all the time, researching it.
-Wanting to die. Not kill myself, but I have the urge to go 120 mph in my car and drive off a bridge
-Crying over NOTHING
-Fear when I'm driving home that the person is following me. It comes to a point where I WILL take unnessacary LONG paths home just to get away from the person I think is following me.
-Sometimes I see things on me, like bugs? But then I like slap the bug and nothing was there to begin with.
-EXTREME tiredness, fatigue. I'm talking sleeping for 16 hours and more.
-I feel like sometimes at night if I see something glow in my room, or like a tiny part of light that it's a camera recording me. I know this sounds ridiculous, but at the time when it happens it makes sense.
-During the day I feel like I'm in a dream. It's pretty scary though because I'll be driving, and then suddenly "wake up" and realize "HEY IM DRIVING" and panic, cause it feels like I'm sleeping. At school I don't even realize I'm walking sometimes.
-I imagine things that have happened. I went to a funeral for my friend recently and later on brought up with my mom the fact that it was rude to read her journal to everyone. Then I find out that NEVER happened.
I dunno, it's getting to the point where my grades are all F's, I don't get ANY sleep at nighttime, only during the day, and I don't even talk to friends anymore.
Now multiply all of that times 10 and that's my life now.
I wish I could "suck it up", my life, isn't even a life now.
But anyways, I dunno. I feel like me taking ridiculous amounts of sleeping pills has had SOME kind of effect on me.
I know I could go to a psychiatrist, but frankly I don't have that much money.
Anyways,
-Obsession with death, looking at it all the time, researching it.
-Wanting to die. Not kill myself, but I have the urge to go 120 mph in my car and drive off a bridge
-Crying over NOTHING
-Fear when I'm driving home that the person is following me. It comes to a point where I WILL take unnessacary LONG paths home just to get away from the person I think is following me.
-Sometimes I see things on me, like bugs? But then I like slap the bug and nothing was there to begin with.
-EXTREME tiredness, fatigue. I'm talking sleeping for 16 hours and more.
-I feel like sometimes at night if I see something glow in my room, or like a tiny part of light that it's a camera recording me. I know this sounds ridiculous, but at the time when it happens it makes sense.
-During the day I feel like I'm in a dream. It's pretty scary though because I'll be driving, and then suddenly "wake up" and realize "HEY IM DRIVING" and panic, cause it feels like I'm sleeping. At school I don't even realize I'm walking sometimes.
-I imagine things that have happened. I went to a funeral for my friend recently and later on brought up with my mom the fact that it was rude to read her journal to everyone. Then I find out that NEVER happened.
I dunno, it's getting to the point where my grades are all F's, I don't get ANY sleep at nighttime, only during the day, and I don't even talk to friends anymore.
Now multiply all of that times 10 and that's my life now.
I wish I could "suck it up", my life, isn't even a life now.
But anyways, I dunno. I feel like me taking ridiculous amounts of sleeping pills has had SOME kind of effect on me.