What. The. Fuck. [TL;DR]

markslove

New member
So, most of you know I just got over swine flu. Well, during the course of it (because I was sleeping so much) I skipped maybe four days worth of my Lexapro. A little bit of information about why I take it.



I won't go into why exactly I have been taking this medication, only that it got pretty bad for me to have to start taking it. Military's orders.

I noticed on Monday when we went back to school that I was having trouble concentrating. Tuesday, when I woke up, I had a horrble cramp in the back of my leg, which I thought was associated with sleeping in an awkward position. But then last night rolled around, and I felt like I was in hell.

My mood bottomed out, and I started thinking all the things that I hate to think about myself. Things that I deem "failures" in my life. 3D was there for me, and assured me that none of these were failures, because they had underlying factors which led to them. That made me feel a bit better, and I ended up finishing my math homework which I had previously told 3D I didn't give a damn about doing because I was going to fail anyway. Completely irrational thought, considering that I'm making a fucking 94 in the class. Then, later that night, every single muscle in my body is tense. My lower back and upper back, my legs, my arms, and under my neck being the worst of them all. Any time I moved I felt like I was pulling a semi just to turn a little bit.

I hate the way my mind works, so I guess that's why it fascinates me. I've known for a long time that the chemicals weren't right up there, but I go through stages without having to have my medication. My life seemed pretty normal, so when I caught the flu (not normal) I thought that maybe I could not take them for a while, considering all the other crap I had in my system at the time.

I was wrong. But the funny thing is, it's never happened before. So why now?

TL;DR VERSION - I didn't take my meds on my own fault during the flu, my mind went rollercoaster on me, and my body locked up. Never have had that happen before, even though I've skipped dosages previously. Any thoughts on what could be a playing factor? I'm thinking maybe school and job stress, but I don't know.
 
I think it might be a combination of pysichal fatigue from the flu and stress. I guess when you take your treatment again (hoping you already have) little by little you will be feeling better. Try to change your ideas a bit, like going out for a nice walk or doing something you really like, that might help with your stress and the mood.

You should ask 3D for an hour long massage :P

I hope you will be feeling better soon.
 
Haha, thanks guys. I might even get him to rub me down with lotion and stuffs so that not only do I feel great, but I smell good too. :)

I'm just sick of hurting. :( It sucks.
 
Guys


if she'll let you massage bacon grease and apple butter on her...marry her

1b8d8b4350.gif
 
I can see how all of what you mention tie into the nervous system and since your body was already under so much stress and fatigued it had no way of dealing with all the mental stress you apparently have usually suppressed with your meds. I don't know, but it makes sense, pseudo-educated guess.

I hope you get to feeling better soon Danni. :)
 
I hate to sound Holistic, but I find that to deal with most of life's physical annoyances, a healthy attitude works wonders. If you're heads not in the right place, your body will follow. I'm an overweight old man who hasn't seen a doctor in a long long time. I feel pretty good, rarely get sick. My wife is convinced it's my attitude about things, because I'm usually feeling pretty good and I can literally think through it. I am sorry if I'm rambling. I'm just saying if you can de-stress your mind too, it might help.
 
Sounds about right to me. I mean, the meds are supposed to suppress it, and when I skip more than one dose, that's less serotonin that I'm getting.



When I'm on my medication, by all means I have the ability to destress. You can ask 3D. I've been through hell with moving, getting school together, and everything. I haven't cracked a bit. I've gotten sick, yes. But depressive? This is the first it's happened since I've moved.

Sucks when your brains are broked. :tongue:



Working on it, dear. :hug2:
 
Danni-

When I was 10 I was molested. I never told anybody. My mind started hiding in itself and I got physically weaker as the days went on. I was dizzy and couldn't hold down food, I also had a fever. They did a cat scan on me, along with multiple routine blood tests, and after 3 weeks of me being bed-ridden they decided it must have been caused by emotional trauma.

Anyways so what I am saying is that the mind has its own ways of taking care of the body, and it's not always for the better. I could be wrong of course, I'm not a doctor. But maybe taking the pills isn't what you need. Maybe it's blanketing the problem instead of fixing it. And I'm just offering up some ideas.
 
True, it could be just blanketing the problem, but when my emotional and physical state starts interfering with school, I think I'd rather blanket it for now.

It sucks, I know. And I totally look forward to a day where I won't have to be on any medication at all. Maybe by the time I hit my Masters, or even more optimistically, my Bacherlor's degree, I'll have figured out that magic mantra that will help me through the day. Until then though, I have to keep on trucking, as much as I hate to do so.
 
Back
Top