What is the best joke you know?

  • Thread starter Thread starter jayblob211
  • Start date Start date
Sir Charles took his Rolls-Royce in for service. When he returned later to collect the car, the mechanic handed him a golf tee, which he said he had found on the front seat.

"What's this ?" the mechanic asked.

"That's a tee," replied Sir Charles. "I put my balls on that before I drive."

"Jesus !" exclaimed the mechanic. "Rolls-Royce think of everything !"
 
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?“
 
So, there were three guys on a boat, but it crashed and got stranded on a island. the guys wander to find water and food and shelter, and run into a tribe of cannibals. the cannibal leader talks with his tribesmen, and approaches the men.
he says " We will not eat you now, but you must pass a test. You each must go into the jungle and bring us back 10 items of one type of fruit, i.e apples or oranges."
The guys go into the forest, and the first one comes back with 10 bananas. the cannibal leader then tells him, "In order for us to not eat you, you must stick all the bananas up your butt, but you cannot make a noise or facial expression.
So he goes, 1,2,3,4,5 and then grunts, so the cannibals eat him
the next guy comes back with 10 cherries. the leader says the same thing to him, and he goes, 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and then starts laughing uncontrollably, so he gets eaten.

In heaven, the first guy asks the second guy, why'd you laugh, you were so close to escaping.

The second says, i saw the third guy coming back with 10 watermelons....


HOpe you like it :)
 
theres a boy called johnny push harder... one day he was having sex with his teacher when his father comes along and sees them... JOHNNY PUSH HARDER!! he bellows and poor johnny replies.. "i'm trying to dad"... lol

can i have 10 pts i really really need them... =] thank you!!

hope it made u laughed... =P
 
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