WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS POEM?? TELL ME PLEASE :)?

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I am the walrus

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i'm submitting this poem into a contest, and i wanted to know what people think about it, what i need to work on, and if it's good enough
please help! =)


Wearing This Mask

I wear this mask everyday
I wear this mask for you to never see the real me
I wear this mask to hide my true feelings
I wear this mask to cover up many things
I wish this mask as an everyday accessory
I wear this mask in fear of saying something stupid
I wear this mask to make sure no one sees the pain lying beneath the surface
I wear this mask to disguise a girl I don’t want you to know
I wear this mask to present a girl who appears to be happy all the time
I wear this mask knowing I can fool the world with it
I wear this mask that everyone thinks is really me
I wear this mask to seem as though I have not a care in the world
I wear this mask to keep others at a distance
I wear this mask to hide the complexities of myself
I wear this mask to appear very put together
I wear this mask to feel superior and better than most
I wear this mask to cover my anxiety of what others would perceive me as if I were not to
I wear this mask because I have to, not because I want to
I wear this mask to never display the sensitive, insecure girl I really am
I wear this mask to never appear weak or vulnerable
I wear this mask to present to the world someone whom I wish I was but am not
I wear this mask in hopes that one day you’ll learn to look beyond it
I wear this mask to not be susceptible to others’ judgments
I wear this mask praying that someday I wont have to anymore
I wear this mask to mute the sound of myself screaming, desperately wanting to take it off
I wear this mask for you to never see the real me
I wear this mask everyday
 
seems kind of repetitive to me. The subject matter (the mask) is a bit cliche IMO, but if thats what you want to write about go for it.
 
I think you can express your feelings very well, and have the framework for great material.

But in this case, this poem is just too much put together

I would try to separate the poem into more defined paragraphs and give a bit more structure to it.

It sounds like a lot of ideas (great ideas) put together almost randomly.

Play with these ideas to create something more defined. Just keep up the good work.
 
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