what do you think of my poem?

R

Rosalie

New member
You stand and stare,
As a girl is dieing you don,t seem to care,
How could you be such a cold blooded heartless person,
You didn't try to save her and you even stalked her at her school excursion,
You shall burn in hell,
Cause you did nothing to save her as she fell,
I will find a way to kill you,
And I know everything about you its something i knew,
Tomorrow you will dead,
I swear i will kill you Fred..
 
It lacks a certain flow but I like it.
I am unsure about the line "And I know everything about you its something i knew,"
Keep up the good work but I would suggest maybe working on it a bit...
 
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