what do you think of my poem?

T

Tom

New member
it is a big wast of time
the jokes i tell arnt even mine
you say draw a rainbow i draw a line
i sit in a pit turn my head too taste the wine
all across the open road this child i own just whines
i know i would leave this hell hold wasteland if only i had a vine

bad blood was spilt
cant walk straight so i tilt
my woman wants to marry must jilt
the scottish lie and cheat and wear a stupid kilt
when i propose i wont beg and degrade i will never melt
i saw a man dehydrating and poured away my tall bottle of lilt

the cold dead i see
beg and plea i set them free
all alone i tell them they will be
work hard trade your soul and become me
how their teeth-less rotten smelly mouths fill with glee
i am the right and they are my slaves they will fill my machete
 
its ok, but try not to concentrate to much on making it rhyme initially or it will limit Your creativity.

tip-try to stick to a theme rather then being so random.
 
Back
Top