What do you think of my poem?

  • Thread starter Thread starter dancetilldawn202
  • Start date Start date
D

dancetilldawn202

Guest
I posted this a bit ago, but I revised it some so tell me what you think, constructive criticism welcome and appreciated

Your absence is so heavy
Still your presence is strong
And though you are adrift
I know with you I belong

Your heart was my metronome
Willingly I kept pace
But somewhere I was off
You left without a trace

Your voice was my lullaby
It drifted me to sleep
Now in dark wide-eyed nights
Your memory I keep

Anticipation lingers
With each ring of the phone
Though it is never you
And I remain alone

Caught up in your memory
My skin can feel your hand
My lips can feel your kiss
My heart you still command
 
Back
Top