What do you think about this poem I wrote?

Mark

New member
This is like, the first poem I wrote, so don't expect it to be really good or anything...


On the outside all you can see
Is someone who's happy, kind, and carefree
All he wants to do is seem
Just like they expect him to be

On the inside, that's invisible,
He's sad, angry, scared, and miserable
He wants to act like nothing's wrong
So he'll listen to his favorite song

It calms him down,
Gets rid of his frown
But lately that hasn't been working

He's spiraling,
Spiraling down,
Down deeper into depression

It's coming closer everyday,
The day that his pain will be taken away
 
Good for your first poem.

Use imagery.

Use the five senses.

Metaphor.

Personification.

Simile.

Originality. Try to develop your own original voice.

Keep writing and never stop. only way to get better.

Also, read poetry by famous poets and other modern poets. You will see GREAT improvement by emulating their styles yet keeping your own authenticity throughout your own artwork.

Hope this helped!
 
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