What are your insecurities?

  • Thread starter Thread starter ~*Yuki*~
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my weight. my skin. my face. my arms. my legs. my back... yeah, just about every little thing about my body.
 
^ OMG that was so mean :( My grandmother said my mother shouldn't have had a third kid (me) that only two kids was enough, a third was a "burden", I was 13 and I could never like her the same way again :pout:
 
When I was little my grandmother told me that no one would ever love me...that has always made me feel unworthy and insecure.
 
Occasionally I got really fed up and snapped back, which caused the taunters to laugh like hyenas, they thought it was hystercial that they'd provoked mousy little me in to reacting. And that just made me feel worse. :cry: So eventually I learnt to just march past them and pretend like I hadn't heard anything, basically totally ignore them, because they were looking for a reaction and I wasn't giving them the satisfaction of getting what they wanted. It didn't stop them, but I like to believe it made their little game a bit less fun. My friend once told her mum that she didn't know how I managed to put up with all the crap I got, really it was just sheer determination not to let them win, because I knew I was the better person. :nod:
 
Wow, you just described me at school, I was constantly picked on for the very same reasons, and it definitely scarred me for life, but I think it wasn't just because of the picking on, but because I couldn't find a way to defend myself, all I could do was pretend I didn't care and then cry when I got home. I just couldn't say a word, I couldn't hit anyone, I couldn't do anything at all, because I already felt so shy and embarrassed all the time that mu worst nightmare was to have everyone hearing my voice or looking at me at the same time, cause I thought what if I couldn't defend myself properly and ended up losing the fight, they'd laugh at me even more. So I just kept it all to myself :( :bawl::bawl::bawl:


Another insecurity of mine sometimes s expressing my opinions, when I'm talking to someone I like very much, but who I totally disagree with about something. And it doesn't have to be something important, just something we disagree about. I always feel like I might have said something wrong that hurt the other person even when in reality I felt hurt by what that person said. I also feel frustrated cause I feel like I couldn't get get my point across, I mean, I don't wanna convince anyone that I'm right, no, I just want the other person to see where I'm coming from, to see that there might be different ways to look at the same subject, even if they don't agree with it. I always do that, you know, every time I take part in any kind of debate about anything, I may not agree with people, but I definitely take what they say with me afterwards and I look at it and I think "ok, that makes sense too", which I think is a good thing, yet I always end up feeling like I'm the only one who does that, and the other people just forget what I say and don't take any of it into consideration. Worse, I always end up feeling like they'll think my opinion isn't a strong or valid one because of this, because I just don't say "Yeah, ok, you think that way, I respect you, but I don't see it, period"
I had a discussion like this with my friend this week, and now I feel terrible about it, I apologized to her more than once and I don't even know why I apologized, I mean, I have the right to say what I think, but like I said, I just feel like I've offended her because I said she was too radical in the way she said some things, like, I could see her point of view and it made sense but I don't think anything I said made sense to her, exactly because she was too "this is it, period.", I know it wasn't her intention to sound like that, she explained it and all, but I had already used the "radical" word, so now I feel bad about it, even though that's how I felt at the time and even though she already said it didn't hurt her and that she would've told me if it had.
I know, I'm paranoid, and now I feel weird taking to her :(
 
My looks and weight. Sometimes I have good days where Im like "I am pretty" and other days where im just like "blah"
 
I always plan not to talk, but I AM a very talkative person and I usually have an opinion and difficulties not sharing it :lol:
It's horrible... and my mouth is so much faster than my brain! :rolleyes:
 
:nod: That is an awful feeling. I've had to learn to laugh at myself, and that helps.
 
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