J
jrb76
Guest
Hi everyone, first post here...
I'm in a bit of a spot here. A couple of weeks ago I was feeling stressed out and basically shut myself up in my apartment, didn't answer my cell phone or anything. I basically spent a whole week either in the apartment or in the library when I wasn't shopping for Christmas. I know my parents and siblings were trying to get in touch with me to make sure I was all right (I've had some abuse problems in the past that I've gotten over, hopefully). Although there was a chance they needed me to come over to their house and do some work (I'm currently working only part time and could have helped them if I needed to, but almost every time I do work for them I experience burnout-type symptoms within an hour or so of starting.)
But on Christmas Eve I came to their place, presents and all, ready to celebrate the holiday with them, and three days of family get-togethers went fairly smoothly. (I made up an excuse that I had misplaced my cell phone and found it the night before.)
Then last week Sunday after Christmas (the 27th), I went out to their place again to help them out. Things didn't go all that smoothly, I didn't have a clue what I was doing compared to everyone else that was out there, and it was well after nightfall (we were working almost completely without lights) by the time I was able to shower up and go home. Relatives were getting on my case a little bit. I didn't snap back at them (I rarely have, and the two or three times in my life I have I've deeply and almost immediately regretted it.)
Anyway, when I got back to my apartment I pretty much shut myself off again. Last night, I drove around, well over a hundred miles, just so I wouldn't be in the apartment in case someone tried to go there. I haven't been picking up my cell again, and I know they've been trying to get back in touch with me. I'm sure they know I'm not in any real trouble (they were at least able to find my car downtown today while I was at the library and leave a note on the winRABhield). I've pretty much just been going back to my apartment to sleep, and they know I've been going back there.
So I need to at least get in touch with my parents, but I don't know how to go about it. My anxiety's been in high gear for the last week. I can't work up the courage to even call them, much less stop in at their place. I don't even know what, if anything, they need me to do for them (I haven't even had the nerve to actually look at their notes.) If I had to do any work for them right now, I don't know that I could go through with it, and I don't have a good reason to say no. And let's face it, I can't use the old "misplaced the cell phone" excuse again.
Any suggestions for how to work up the courage to get back in touch with my parents, and how to explain my behavior for the last two weeks once I do? My family knows I have anxiety tendencies, but I've never been officially diagnosed or treated. They're not really receptive to medical treatment (and neither am I), but I can honestly say my anxiety has never been this bad for me to avoid them the way I have.
Thanks in advance for any advice or suggestions.
I'm in a bit of a spot here. A couple of weeks ago I was feeling stressed out and basically shut myself up in my apartment, didn't answer my cell phone or anything. I basically spent a whole week either in the apartment or in the library when I wasn't shopping for Christmas. I know my parents and siblings were trying to get in touch with me to make sure I was all right (I've had some abuse problems in the past that I've gotten over, hopefully). Although there was a chance they needed me to come over to their house and do some work (I'm currently working only part time and could have helped them if I needed to, but almost every time I do work for them I experience burnout-type symptoms within an hour or so of starting.)
But on Christmas Eve I came to their place, presents and all, ready to celebrate the holiday with them, and three days of family get-togethers went fairly smoothly. (I made up an excuse that I had misplaced my cell phone and found it the night before.)
Then last week Sunday after Christmas (the 27th), I went out to their place again to help them out. Things didn't go all that smoothly, I didn't have a clue what I was doing compared to everyone else that was out there, and it was well after nightfall (we were working almost completely without lights) by the time I was able to shower up and go home. Relatives were getting on my case a little bit. I didn't snap back at them (I rarely have, and the two or three times in my life I have I've deeply and almost immediately regretted it.)
Anyway, when I got back to my apartment I pretty much shut myself off again. Last night, I drove around, well over a hundred miles, just so I wouldn't be in the apartment in case someone tried to go there. I haven't been picking up my cell again, and I know they've been trying to get back in touch with me. I'm sure they know I'm not in any real trouble (they were at least able to find my car downtown today while I was at the library and leave a note on the winRABhield). I've pretty much just been going back to my apartment to sleep, and they know I've been going back there.
So I need to at least get in touch with my parents, but I don't know how to go about it. My anxiety's been in high gear for the last week. I can't work up the courage to even call them, much less stop in at their place. I don't even know what, if anything, they need me to do for them (I haven't even had the nerve to actually look at their notes.) If I had to do any work for them right now, I don't know that I could go through with it, and I don't have a good reason to say no. And let's face it, I can't use the old "misplaced the cell phone" excuse again.
Any suggestions for how to work up the courage to get back in touch with my parents, and how to explain my behavior for the last two weeks once I do? My family knows I have anxiety tendencies, but I've never been officially diagnosed or treated. They're not really receptive to medical treatment (and neither am I), but I can honestly say my anxiety has never been this bad for me to avoid them the way I have.
Thanks in advance for any advice or suggestions.