...delicate sensibilities. O.K? Seriously...this joke is kind of disgusting. Please don't read this if you are going to be offended. I don't want anyone to get mad at me.
O.K. here goes....
There was a morbidly obese woman, about 450 lbs in her mu mu, who had a golf-ball sized boil on her taint. You all know what the taint is; it's that little stretch of skin between the vag. and the a-ho....It taint the vag, and it taint the a-ho. Anyway, this tremendous boil was filled with pus, and had a dime-sized scab on the top, and it was extremely painful. She was unable to reach it, due to her arms being the size of huge hanging cheeses.
Her friend suggested she call the Boil Sucker...."He's in the book."
An hour later, the Boil Sucker arrived at her front door. White over-alls, hat, boots, a little toolbox....."Hey lady, I'm here to suck the boil on your taint. Well, are you gonna let me in?"
After he entered, the fat lady asked him how they should proceed.
"On your knees, and spread 'em" the boil sucker commanded. She was in such a state of distress, she willingly complied. The man got down for a closer look...but due the the voluminous nature of her buttocks, her taint remained hidden. He opened his toolbox and removed a tool that was a cross between a bar-clamp and a pair of giant shoehorns.
After a little adjusting, and tightening of knobs, he had her butt-cheeks sufficiently parted, and the offending boil was exposed and vulnerable.
The stink of her unwashed crack wafted through the room.
The boil sucker did not waste any time. First he nibbled off the scab, and swallowed it after only chewing three or four times. Then he began to suck. The pus ran down his throat like sour milk and rotten goat cheese, complete with chunks of rotted flesh, and week old urine.
After two full minutes of sucking, the boil was almost drained. The fat lady was nearly weeping with relief, when she let out an enormous wet fart that covered the man's face with a stinky brown ooze.
As he reached for a rag, he exclaimed...."What are you trying to do lady, Gross me out???"
I first heard this in 1971. Pretty gross, but I warned you, right?
O.K. here goes....
There was a morbidly obese woman, about 450 lbs in her mu mu, who had a golf-ball sized boil on her taint. You all know what the taint is; it's that little stretch of skin between the vag. and the a-ho....It taint the vag, and it taint the a-ho. Anyway, this tremendous boil was filled with pus, and had a dime-sized scab on the top, and it was extremely painful. She was unable to reach it, due to her arms being the size of huge hanging cheeses.
Her friend suggested she call the Boil Sucker...."He's in the book."
An hour later, the Boil Sucker arrived at her front door. White over-alls, hat, boots, a little toolbox....."Hey lady, I'm here to suck the boil on your taint. Well, are you gonna let me in?"
After he entered, the fat lady asked him how they should proceed.
"On your knees, and spread 'em" the boil sucker commanded. She was in such a state of distress, she willingly complied. The man got down for a closer look...but due the the voluminous nature of her buttocks, her taint remained hidden. He opened his toolbox and removed a tool that was a cross between a bar-clamp and a pair of giant shoehorns.
After a little adjusting, and tightening of knobs, he had her butt-cheeks sufficiently parted, and the offending boil was exposed and vulnerable.
The stink of her unwashed crack wafted through the room.
The boil sucker did not waste any time. First he nibbled off the scab, and swallowed it after only chewing three or four times. Then he began to suck. The pus ran down his throat like sour milk and rotten goat cheese, complete with chunks of rotted flesh, and week old urine.
After two full minutes of sucking, the boil was almost drained. The fat lady was nearly weeping with relief, when she let out an enormous wet fart that covered the man's face with a stinky brown ooze.
As he reached for a rag, he exclaimed...."What are you trying to do lady, Gross me out???"
I first heard this in 1971. Pretty gross, but I warned you, right?