P
Pray2012Pray
Guest
I am an alcoholic. But a catalyst sent from God upon request has had me believe that the darkness that becomes alcohol addiction is slowly weaning in my life. I consider confidently that having come to understand why I developed this addiction I am being released from its chains.:angel:
I understand today that it was my questioning my worth and having alcohol validate them during those moments of oblivion and intoxication that has become the reason I was sucked me into a spiral I could not get out of. That is the devil speaking their.:angel:
Since I was abandoned at the age of 5 I have always carried these phenomenal incessant questions surrounding my value as a human. I would front obstacles in this mountain that has become a depiction of MY LIFE and often found myself perched upon this vast mountain comfronted by the stillness, isolation and sanctuary of that unjudgemental pinnacle. :angel:
However in saying that, when I eventually did look down as one does when they pray, it turned out that it was no longer a mountain that I was afraid of, no longer ashamed of and certainly no longer a stranger to and I am moving on now to a bigger and more magnificent mountain in which the steps I take are carefully considered because I am no longer afraid, ashamed or a stranger to it. :angel:
There is no alcohol on this next mountain. There is no questioning my value as a human. There are no choices that shall lead me down the path of destruction and there is no human upon it that I won't understand or be hurt by because of judgement. I UNDERSTAND. :angel:
Alcohol, alcohol, alcohol - how it hinders humanities progression into the light. Why do we not see the light and continue to let that heavy veil cover our eyes. Let us all take off that veil that satan places in front of us and tread now into the light.:angel:
My love, compassion, empathy and understanding for all who suffer under the current yet slowly transforming arabience which has become humanity today.:angel:
Pax et Bonum.
M xxooxx
I understand today that it was my questioning my worth and having alcohol validate them during those moments of oblivion and intoxication that has become the reason I was sucked me into a spiral I could not get out of. That is the devil speaking their.:angel:
Since I was abandoned at the age of 5 I have always carried these phenomenal incessant questions surrounding my value as a human. I would front obstacles in this mountain that has become a depiction of MY LIFE and often found myself perched upon this vast mountain comfronted by the stillness, isolation and sanctuary of that unjudgemental pinnacle. :angel:
However in saying that, when I eventually did look down as one does when they pray, it turned out that it was no longer a mountain that I was afraid of, no longer ashamed of and certainly no longer a stranger to and I am moving on now to a bigger and more magnificent mountain in which the steps I take are carefully considered because I am no longer afraid, ashamed or a stranger to it. :angel:
There is no alcohol on this next mountain. There is no questioning my value as a human. There are no choices that shall lead me down the path of destruction and there is no human upon it that I won't understand or be hurt by because of judgement. I UNDERSTAND. :angel:
Alcohol, alcohol, alcohol - how it hinders humanities progression into the light. Why do we not see the light and continue to let that heavy veil cover our eyes. Let us all take off that veil that satan places in front of us and tread now into the light.:angel:
My love, compassion, empathy and understanding for all who suffer under the current yet slowly transforming arabience which has become humanity today.:angel:
Pax et Bonum.
M xxooxx