To men and women: Do you feel that you and your lover argue well together?

[Seeker Of Painful Truths]

Or not?

What I mean by "argue well" is: When you have a fight, no matter how big or small, do you...

1) confront the problem immediately, fight it out together to the deepest degree, until it is solved, and eventually solve it?

2) Or, do you both avoid the problem altogether in order to avoid negativity?

3) Or do you both fight about it and make some progress, but get so fustrated that you both (or one) stops fighting, leaving the problem to still partically exist?

1) And, (if this happens in your relationship) which one of you (the boyfriend/husband, or girlfriend/wife) usually starts the fights?

2) Which one usually avoids the fights?

3) Which one of you trys to fix the problem. Or do you both equally do so?

Thoughts?
Julie M - " (in "core beliefs" arguments, we do a lot of agreeing to disagree)" Everything you say sounds pretty healthy. Agreeing to disagree on core beliefs make sense since you are who you are. It sounds like you two both trully respect each other. Awesome. Hahaha, "Survival of the fittest"!
Son Chichi - If you giving in a lot works out for the both of you in a positive way, then thats cool. But if the problem still lingers, I hope you both find ways of still reaching an agreement. I hope you don't stress out about grumbling under your breath a lot. If your both happy, it sounds like things are working out.

 

[Sheba Jack]

My husband and I rarely argue any more. When we do have an argument we both keep our voices down usually and try to talk about the problem without screaming at each other, that helps allot. We avoid door slamming and tantrums that add fuel to the fire. We try to discuss the problem without bring up things from the past and without hurting each other. We usually resolve an argument within an hour. When we were younger we argued more, but as time had gone by we argue less, much less. I think the last argument I had with my husband was in January. I am usually the one to let things go that irritate me. To me petty things are not worth arguing over. I may still be irritated about something, but it is usually other things on my mind that are bothering me that make it an issue. Usually once I have had time to relax those things don't matter very much, so it was worth keeping my mouth shut and not starting an argument over something petty.