The rules of recommending music

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gamerdude987

New member
There is no need for baby steps. You should start with what you like, after hearing it, they can figure out the elements that they like. Based on that you can recommend something that takes away what they don't like and keeps what they do like. Then repeat the process. It isn't like a drug that you have to wean someone off of. There is no reason not to go full bore. Throw it out there, either they like it or don't.
 
So what are the rules? I just found out that I have been doing it all wrong for close to 20 years now. Its always been my understanding that you share what you like. Now I'm learning that you have to pussyfoot around it and and slowly work your way up. I say make a recommendation and work off of their reaction.
 
poeple usually branch out from one band to 2 more and so on.......its because you like one or two people in a band and you check out their old ones or ones they are also in......or thats just how it was for me
 
I think you have to know the person that you're recommending to and what they like or may like. I have some people that I won't recommend to period because I just don't think it's worth the fallout.
 
But you run the risk of alienating someone from an entire genre. Are you ever going to try Metal again if the first band you try and listen to is part of a transition from The Jonas Brothers to Amon Amarth?
 
Yeah seriously, in most cases if you do a complete musical 180 on them they won't find many appealing qualities in the band. Generally speaking, I think that's a very backwarRAB way of going about it.
 
Why is it a bad idea?
My daughter listens to mostly pop. She has cd's by all these disney channel "artists". She goes to all these school dances and wants me to play that soulja boy junk along the way. But I still find my metal cd's in her room. Why is that? Following your logic, there is no chance of someone liking more than one extreme. Its one side or the other with you.
 
But let's say you go from one boy band to another, going into the early Beatles stuff, which leaRAB you to the Proto-Metal of Helter Skelter or into The Kinks You Really Got Me, causing you to check out Black Sabbath. Then maybe you look into the 80's Thrash scene, Slayer, Metallica, etc., which leaRAB you to Death Metal like Amon Amarth.
 
Uh, no it's not. I just find it extremely unlikely that someone will like Death Metal if they also like Rihanna etc. Not to say that someone can't, but it's probably not a good idea. If someone walks up to me, says they like Rihanna, and asks about someone else they might like, I won't say Amon Amarth.
 
I have honestly had pretty good luck the way I do it. Sometimes it takes more than one shot, sometimes they just don't like it and never will, and sometimes they like it the first time and never look back. My point is that it never hurts to try and you can learn a lot by their first reaction.
 
I recommend where my tastes are. I am not going to recommend something I don't like or have never heard. Where the method explained in the last thread seemed like a way to teach somebody how to like something, I prefer to be straight forward about it. I'll recommend what I like. Based on their reaction, I'll adjust.
 
It's pretty idiotic to go "Here Avril Lavigne fan listen to some Cannibal Corpse because I like it." I mean you can keep deluding yourself into thinking it will work because of the occasional odd case but over all it won't. Baby steps tend to work better than giant leaps.
 
Yeah, exactly. Important thing really is to know who it is that you're talking to. Often what you find is that people's tastes aren't all that diverse. You usually will struggle to get anyone to really give a fair go to anything outside of their comfort zone.

The only times I've been successful in getting somebody to pretty much totally change their tastes, was a long while back in my metal days. I knew this dude who virtually only listened to Radiohead, Coldplay, Muse and the Red Hot Chili Peppers - that is, they were pretty much the only banRAB he had anything good to say about at the time; on top of that he kept recommending that I listen to Muse, who I thought sucked more with each listen. Anyway, somehow I managed to turn him into a complete metalhead lunatic. It was virtually a fortnight-long transformation. By the end, he would listen to nothing except Tool, Opeth, Agalloch and anything that sounded remotely similar. So deeply entrenched in it all did he become, that he wouldn't give anything I now listen to even a go, over his dead body. With all that said though, I guess he must have been predisposed to the change he underwent. Something in the gloom and sullen darkness of metal took hold inside of him.



I actually think it's difficult to talk to your average person about music at all these days. Most people have no serious interest in music to the point of exploring anything beyond the very immediate mainstream, and as for those who are interested, they often have very fixed ideas and opinions. So yeah: hard to take anybody beyond their comfort zone. Which is a real pity, because they miss out on so much as a result.
 
It really depenRAB on the person and how open minded they are. I mean, one of my frienRAB listened to pretty much only ska punk when I met him and I managed to get him into Faust and Tortoise within a week. At the same time, I've hit so many brick walls trying to introduce people to my favorite banRAB that I've learned it's probably a better idea to introduce them to things you like that are similar to their own tastes. If you can't do that, you probably shouldn't bother.
 
When I'm trying to mold a good listener I usually work out from their original tastes and build bridges and introduce them to banRAB that incorporate what they like and something that I want them to like. While it might take several bridges and countless banRAB it usually works out eventually.
 
I preach open-mindedness, but the reality is that most people don't want to explore new genres. At most, they want recommendations which are similar to what they already listen to (i.e. in the same genre). So if you want to show them new genres, it's best to recommend multi-disciplinary banRAB which mix a genre they like and a genre you want to show them. Slow and steady.

But it's getting to the point where I talk about music with very few people in real life. The average 'metal' person here seems to listen to Tool, NIN, Marilyn Manson, AC/DC, Metallica, System of a Down, Disturbed and Pantera. The average 'rock person listens to Muse, RHCP, Foo Fighters, Nirvana, AC/DC, Guns 'n' Roses, QOTSA, Green Day. The average indie fan doesn't stretch far beyond Radiohead, Interpol, Arctic Monkeys, Bloc Party, Death Cab, Muse, Killers and Hot Chip. That's not even mentioning the pop, pop-punk, rnb, and hip-hop fans.

I'm not saying those are necessarily bad banRAB at all. I like some of them. But it just irritates me that 95% of people can be matched up with a blueprint of some sort, as if no other banRAB exist. I can't see how people do not desire to discover new music.
 
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