The Martial Arts and Children: how should I discuss it with my 11 year-old female...

  • Thread starter Thread starter Michael M
  • Start date Start date
M

Michael M

Guest
...cousin? Lately, I have been downloading several episodes of the History Channel's 'Human Weapon' series on to my 360. While doing so, I've been thinking that it might be a good idea to suggest to my little cousin to ponder the possibility of having her parents take her to a free trial martial arts class, so she can understand why learning a martial art, especially because she's female, would be a good thing.

In my history, some things have happened that give me a real desire to want to teach women, not just a basic, women-only type of self-defense training, but an actual fighting style. It is really sad that women feel they need to be protected by a man all of the time. I don't see the point when they are perfectly capable of becoming just as strong, if not stronger than their male counterparts.

Secondly, with all of the recent Amber Alerts, this has definitely become a grave concern for me, but I am not sure how to discuss this with her. Any ideas?
Her parents tell me that they have already discussed this with her, but I have my doubts. This is because when she was enrolled in cheerleading, the first thing she did was come over to tell my family and myself about it. She talks a lot, so I am almost positive that if this had been mentioned to her, she would have told one of my siblings or myself about it.

I seriously doubt she even knows what a martial art is, and why it is important for people to learn.
In case you were wondering, I am 20 years old.
 
what about a self defence class. I think there is one called kruff mcgraw, or something like that. It is real and they teach you many things but the biggest are how to take a punch and how to give one. It might be too intense right now i did it when i was 14, its kind of like fight club though.

don't you ever get her for a weekend you could always take her to a class either self defence or martial arts. idk
 
hi well, of wat ur saying about woman being stronger than men and other people i support u because well it is great! plus that is wat is happening to most women now!

but, about talking to ur cousin of martial arts, is a great idea! plus, if shes a cheerleader it will help in her cheers! martial arts has a lot of felxibility moves. and however small a person is, they can still take down a 250 pound man!
ok wat to say to ur cousin... tell her that u think martial arts would be fun and can help on getting ugly guys u dont like and creeps away from her, she would be able to jump and land better for cheerleading! and if one of here friends goes like syco or is beating up another then there is a style of fighting called akido were all they do is learn practically all the moves but in a different thought like put them in a headlock and twist their arm back and tell that person calmly that i wil not hurt you but if u do not stop i will break ur arm!

so really tell ur cousin would be beneficial to herself and her family nowing that she is safe! and successfull in life if she continues cheereading!
 
Some parents hesitate to bring things up because they can't afford it or their child is involved in enough activities and such that the family literally does not have time for any more. While you are concerned I think you have to realize that you are her cousin and that her parents have the ultimate say over what she does and does not do or become involved in. I would be careful and tread lightly in that area since what you are suggesting is interfering in that whole parent-child thing and their position and authority and leave the ultimate decisions concerning her in their hands. I have several nieces and nephews that would benefit from martial arts and I would certainly give them free access to class and lessons in my school but not all choose to take advantage of that offer. While I know for some of them it would help them so much that parent-child relationship is something that me as their uncle and having a karate school does not give me the right to circumvent.
 
There are 2 martial arts that are credited with being started by women WING CHUN and SOUTHERN OR FUKIEN WHITE CRANE.

I suggest you read this before discussing anything with her.
It covers many points mentioned here but in greater detail.

http://www.nononsenseselfdefense.com/rape.html
 
Realistic self defense isn't learning an unnarmed fighting style.

It is self awareness, environmental awareness, and the ability to evade, avoid, and get out of dangerous situations.

Think of something that is a real deterrant, proper education. Avoiding the bad areas, bad situations, and how to use weapons, and improvised weaponry along with attention calling. Understandably people do not want to give an 11 year old girl a firearm, knife, or pepper spray, but there are personal panic alarms that are VERY helpful. Ones that make an incredibly loud noise that calls A LOT of attention, and are difficult to turn off.

As a woman gets older, introducing weapons as well as how to use them, along with continuing education on how to not be alone, how to avoid bad places, being mindful of her surroundings, parking in well lit and public areas, watching her drinks in clubs, always travelling with friends, etc. I would think by 15 or 16, carrying pepper spray, a personal panic button, plus a knife or kubaton, and instruction and practice in their uses.

Martial Arts are great, and definately a good help as far as giving them the tools to do enough damage to get away. But TRUE self defense means getting advantages over would be attackers, and doing everything possible to prevent and avoid situations where they could be seen as potential victims. At 18, firearms, how to use them, reactionary shooting, speed shooting, along with panic alarms, pepper spray, and other weapons along with being armed with knowledge and self awareness, will contribute to a more realistic self defense profile then learning a Martial Art.

Also when she moves out on her own, having roomates and a good dog are also great. Particularly very loyal breeds like German Shepherds, Rottweilers, Goldens, and Labs. There are a ton others, but a big dog is a great deterrant as well.
Toy dogs not so much, but even they can call a lot of attention.

At 20, you probably have a lot of learning to do about Martial Arts in general, the Human Weapon is good at examining styles, but keep in mind it is doing it still through a positive eye. You never hear them talk about the disadvantages of an art, or even when being taught very unrealistic moves, they (because they are reading lines, not because they believe it) hype the effectiveness of a move.

Yes, a good Judo throw can break bones, cause concussions, and possible kill someone. However more than likely, you will just stun or hurt your opponent and knock the wind of them, especially if you are smaller then they are. But if you believed the Human Weapon every throw is a bone crunching devastating manuver that places your opponent inches away from death.

So keep in mind it is done with a certain bias, especially towards the over exageration of an art or technique by explaining it in a scientific sounding manner.

Realistic self defense is being able to avoid potentiall situations, think quick on your feet to evade a would be attacker, being able surprise, outgun, and overwhelm and remove the threat from an actual attacker, in the easist and quickest way possible, while drawing the most attention so that help can come. Personal alarms, pepper spray, and weapons are way better at acheiving this goal then a kiai, and unarmed strikes.
 
I have been doing martial arts on and off since I was 14. The off time has been due to family issues. I.e move around, or needed to take care of the family. I think the martial arts are great. Is great excersice, it gives you self confidence and dicipline. Plus is very fun too. One thing in particular that is good for kids is that it gives them more self confidence.

Problem with what you describe is that there are very few martial arts that teach fighting or even realistic self defence. As a matter of fact almost no martial arts teach real fighting except maybe a handfull. There are a bunch of arts that claim to teach self defence but it is weak at best. They come up with unrealistic scenarios and they have these pre arrange fight sequences that are so unrealistic that when the time comes, what will most likely happen is that you will get your ass handed to you. I myself am guilty of this. I have recently really began to study martial arts. By this I mean I'm focusing on what is really going on as opposed to techniques. Don't get me wrong, techniques are good. The better the technique the better you are when compare to others. But I have found that the most important thing about self defence is not a sequence of moves but the right mind set. Also, knowing your limits and be aware of the situation.

Some exaple of the things that go through my head is how do I defend myself if I have to fight inside a moving bus? or a moving train. Unfotunately I have not been able to try it (in a control environment) to see how well I fare or to see what works and what doesn't. I'll give you another example. Some martial arts teach gun disarmaments. I think training how to disarm a person with a gun is a waste of time. Is too unrealistic. It always assumes that the person has the gun at point blank range. When I think of this scenario I think in terms of what If I'm sitting down in a restaurant eating some eggs. All of a sudden two masked men walk in with ak-47 demanding all the money. How am I supposed to use that gun disarmament with two guys 10 feet away. I'm not even standing up. I also figure it takes a fraction of a second to squeeze a trigger. There are people out there that can put 9 shots into a target in less than 2 seconds. Now I'm supposed to move out of the way, grab the gun, twist the person wrist, throw that person to the ground and kick him in the head 3 times in less than a couple of miliseconds?!!! B.S. I tell you. The way I see Some guy comes up out of nowhere and points a gun at me. The person will more than likely be out of my reach. My hands will be down plus I will probably be carying something. The person will be one opf 3 type of perpetrator. 1) He is high meaning not all there. Could squeeze that trigger because of bad judgement. 2) He is not high but is desperate or nervous, could squeeze the trigger by accident. 3) This guy has done this a bunch of times and is not afraid to squeeze the trigger. I see 3 ways to end my life.

SO the best self defence is self awareness. Don't go into the bad part of town. Don't go to a frat party by yourself or drink too much. Or be aware that drugs can be put into your drink. Act and walk acertively. The bad guys can smell weakness. Things of that nature.

The other thing is that there is not such thing as woman self defence. There is nothing special about woman self defence that its so difference about male self defence. Again, a lot of B.S. from the martial art community. Long story short is that if someone is going to hurt you they will hurt you the same way whether you are male or female. What may differ is the purpose. A female is more likely to be attacked for the purpose of rape than a guy. Albeit, boys are not excempt for this. Their methodology is usually the same. Beat the victim up. It takes no martial arts training to know that if you heat someone in the head multiple times eventually you are going to hurt them.

I liked the show human weapon and also fight quest. Very interesting. However, the way martial artist train is different than what really happens. Next time you watch tv watch the fight videos. No not the UFC although thats fun. I mean the prison riots, police trying to aprehend a suspect. People fighting at a basketball game. This is the way that most people fight. They rush you, they grab you and they try to pummel your head usually with multiple continuous punches with their right hand to your head. It is very chaotic. When female fight is a bit different because they tend to grab each others hair. So, the fight tend to be a little bit slower. However, the fight usually follow the same pattern. Rush grab, punches and fight end in the ground. That is 1 guy in the ground the other one either on top of him or standing up kicking or punching him.

So, practicing martial arts for the purpose of self defense at least to me is a bit laughfable because the training does not reflect the realities of real fights. That is not to say one should not practice. Again, martial arts are great. Especially that self confidence that you get. The confidence does not come from the kick or punch or throw that you learn. Is the mindset. Is the experience. When you go a few rounds with a bigger guy, and you sweat your ass off in class and you go home with some bruises, you learn something. You learn your limits. You learn that in many a cituation you can stand on your own. That you can get hurt but that you can hurt too. That if you get attack you won't panic and taking action can lead to survival. Thats the important thing about martial arts. The rest is practice and plenty of repetition.

Some martial arts that I recomend are and why?

brazilian jujitsu. -- because they practice constantly. is very effective and will teach you how to grapple. Remember the sequence, rush grab pound. Well, bjj will teach you how to use that grab part to your advantage. Especially good for females because thats where the assailant wants them to be. The assailant want the female on her back. Guess what, BJJ is great on their back. As a matter of fact deadly. They can pull arm bars, chokes and what not from that position. Don't take a BJJ person to the ground. Another grapling art is judo which is similar to bjj but they focus on throws where as bjj focus on the ground work. Also, good old fashion collegian wrestling. The problem with wrestling is the rues. If your back touches the ground you loose. In real life if that happens the fight continues. That said, they are great in the ground and are very strong. Wrestler training is no joke.

thai boxing, boxing, savate, kickboxing. Anything that has to do with ring fighting like boxing. People under estimate boxing and tits counter parts. Well, punches are the most effective weapons and they are natural weapons. Everybody can punch. It may not be with proper technique or power but everybody punches. IS easy. Most importanly it woks in almost all situations. For example, what if you live in the nother region of the U.S. where is snows a lot. Its hard to keep you footing in ice so, kicking will just make it wors. You don't want to kick and then fall to the ground. What if you are going uphill? Even in a swiming pool, punches can beused effectively. The other 3 arts I mention include kicks. Thai boxing include knees and elbows. THe knee is particularly deadly. Is the strongest leg based attack there is and is easy to do. It takes little practice to do it. Most importantly about these arts is that they condition themselves for a fight. They practice to get hit and to hit. Believe me thats exactly what is going to happen in a confrontation, you either will be hitting somebody or somebody will be hitting you. Or maybe a group of people will be hitting you. If you can't get hit you can't fight period.

For more traditional like arts then kajukenbo or krav maga. They are big into self defence where as the aformetion ones are more based on competition.

For weapons try any filipino martial arts like kali, escrima and such. They usually use sticks to fight but many practice knife attacks and defence. Now, a stick can be anything. A stick can be found almost anywhere too. So, is not impractical as opposed to lets say kenjutsu or kendo. When are you going to fight with a sword? never.

Anything outside of the ones I mention except maybe a few others are a waste of time as far as fighting is concerned. Aikido is a waste of time for real fighting. Not to say it has its benefits. Its very traditional and spiritual but against a person from the ones of the school mentioned above they are more likely to loose. Simply because the other arts simplicity. Is easier to throw a punch than learn a very complicated move that requires precision and positioning under lots of pressure. Tae kwondo, a lot of the kung fu etc etc. They just don't practice right.
 
Show her a lot of martial art films and she might think they're cool, especially the ones with female martial artists. Then just ask her what she thinks of martial arts.
 
Hi Michael. I would suggest 2 Chinese arts 1. Wing Chun, is the only style made by a woman a nun and I'm pretty sure you have seen this style in the highest lever in movies, this style became famous by Bruce Lee, Later he change it's named to Jee Kun do or the way of the intercepting fist. Wing Chun is a very popular martial art in Hong Kong and 2. Ba-qua Chan a very fluid but powerful martial art and this style you could see it in a movie called The One by Jet Le.
 
Most martial arts teach variety of arm, leg, and body movements targeted to effectively block an attack and make a counter attack so that the attacker does not come back.

In any street fight though the best attack is a good escape, so I would think running with hurdles should count as best defence ;)

Now in a real life scenario how a trained person uses his art form to win a fight is totally on that person himself/herself.

So apart from just practicing the movements and exercises in that MA a person should also train his/her mind to become self-confident and assertive but not aggressive. I dont know how many trainers include mind training in their classes.

Also you need to be aware of the situation around you, so that you can try escape if you sense danger. Actual fighting should be a last resort.

I have read that for women forms like Aikido,Judo etc are better suited. But then it also depends on the personality and liking of the individual.
 
Women, even women without self-defense training, don't need a man to protect them.

The most important parts of self-defense, and generally success in life is maintaining awareness, an index of suspicion, and having a confident, assertive manner.

PS, I love strong, independent women, nothing sexier.
 
Back
Top