the drunk thread

Well, first weekend back at school so that means no work and lots of beverage consuming. yesterday me and my room mates all met up with some frienRAB and went to tailgate before the game. ended up not going to the game and watch it on tv instead so we don't have to stop drinking. Continue this trend and fast foward to around 2 am and I'm on basically blackout, wandering down the street in search of the bus stop. never found bus stop. instead i saw three girls sitting on some steps in front of the apartment building. in search of help, i asked where the bus stop was...they didn't know. but they asked where i was going, and after i told them, they got all stoked and were like "that's where we're going! just ride in our cab!" obviously, i oblige. get a free cab ride to their house, which is five doors down from mine, they invite me in. end up doing shots with all of them, got super high, had a grand ol' time. then walked home. smiling, of course.

oh, and i forgot all three of their names.

but i did write on your whiteboard "*my address* come visit for shots".

cliff notes: got drunk, got lost, found girls, free cab, shots, success
 
i think my biggest problem on sorab is i have not consolidated my drunk postins to this thread.

scotch

pumpkin seeRAB

cigarettes.



i need to work on "thread" yes? i shall. by the end of this week i shall deliver.
 
So i fracked up this weekend. And the worste part is, i would have done all of these things sober:

Got drunk,
accidently knocked my frienRAB iphone on the ground as he was holding it,
paid 20 bucks to help him replace cracked back screen (not front),
in a bright room, fracking BRIGHT ASS LAMP is killing the mood with a girl,
cant turn it off because then its pitch black,
put a towel and a shirt over the lampshade,
a fairly large lampshade too,
fracking BURNED the lampshade and almost caught on fire,
(luckily after i was done with the room)
apparently it was high wattage and over heated,
spent 16$ on a replacement shirt,
30$ to replace the lampshade,
and paid 10 buck that night for drinks.

Fun none the less, just didnt expect to have to pay so much....
 
Let me hit you with the facts: Party takes place at the commissioner of the tpc's house (he and wife are at ryder's cup).

Materials: 24oz Colt 45, 6 pack XX, and a 24oz Foster

My friend lives two houses away from girl who is throwing party. It's a birthday celebration with the theme Librarians vs. Barbarians. All girls lookin hot, one guy dress up as barbarian.

Walk up, play a game of pong. My friend had j's but no drinks so I let him drink all of our cups because it wasn't my beer anyway (lucked out). So he (Walter) got pretty drunk and this is his first party.

Night continues with dancing and singing, smokin on the back porch, black kid wanks off and helicopters dick in front of everyone, but somehow it was cool. Not cool with me though cause I caught him lookin at me while he was rubbin it and that freaked me out. He has a girlfriend too and she was there so somehow he gets away with this.

Outside smoking with Walter and girl. Look in window and see kid walks by in suit and bow tie. Girl says "not again, they're putting mr *******'s clothes again, THEY DO THIS EVERY TIME". Hilarious, fracking hilarious. Another kid walks by (same one wackin off early) with no pants and a dress shirt and bowtie.

Brother comes home. First thing he sees is two kiRAB holding beers sturabling in his dad's clothes and a third kid in a barbarian outfit. He asks for his sis. They meet up, he says keep everyone safe and he leaves. Phew. Im in the dad's closet with people hiding. I have never seen so many golf clothes. All unopened. It was epic.

We go back to the kitchen to party. Few more people show up and I take a liking to a girl. We go outside and chill in the front garden area in a hammock. Go back inside, kid ordered 2 pizzas and cinnamon sticks. I take 2 slices and steal the icing and eat it all.

My friend Walter is now throwing up in the bathroom and the girls are rubbing his back and feeding him bread and saltines. I tell him I love him and dont forget to breathe. Some girl overhears and tells everyone Walter is not breathing. Small freak out, I clear things up. Friend picks up Walter and takes him back to his house (the one two houses away, were sleepin there). He tells me we have to go. No way I'm gettin some, peace. He is angry - frack em

I find girl go outside again. She has to run inside. I stay outside for a sec. This is the climax of how fracked up I was. All drinks are gone and I had also stolen some bud light and yuengling. I black out partially and end up walking up the stairs inside. I puke the pizza and icing and beer. I take two more steps. Puke once more.

*I never puke. Never. First time ever puking drinking and I party pretty frackin hard every weekend at least 1 night. I just wont let myself do it, but I hit the point where it surprised me.

I make it to top of stairs and go into a bathroom and spit a few times. I hear "someone threw up on the stairs". I walk out and a girl I gave a beer earlier on asks me if I threw up..."no I did not throw up and I wouldnt do that" (there is throw up on my shirt, pants, and face.

People are freaking out a little. I make a run for the stairs on the other side of the house. I escape out the front door. I am halfway to my frienRAB sturablin on the golf course. I decide I can get some if I go back. I drunk sprint (jog) it back to the house. Open the door and hear " I think it was Michael". I close door and leave.

I make it to frienRAB house and enter his room. I go to the bathroom. Its dark and I step on something near the toilet. It's Walter fully clothed sleeping on the ground. I pee. He wakes up. We go into the bedroom (friend is asleep in bed). Pass out. Wake up.

A girl hid my phone in the house, so I walk over in the morning to pick it up because I'm supposed to meet my parents for breakfast. Walk up stairs and the girls give me phone. We go over last nights events. They asked if I puke. I admit it. They laugh and I'm like this is fracking cool and we leave.

Great night and there is no tl:dr
 
Nah you young folk need to be SPECIFIC in your writing, you'll learn that when you get your first F on a University level paper.


but some how it was cool. should have been stated as "It was like nobody noticed, some kid whipped his dee out and starting wacking it, it had to be the most bizzare thing I have ever seen, and even crazier that everyone else was in the same frazzled state."
 
Back
Top