Sunday.. my last day of opiates.

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Iron76

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I will PM you some remedies that will help later.
However, I must reinforce how strong the mind is, and how the simple act of thought can hinder progression toward healing. Do not let negative thoughts skulk in to your mind. Write such thoughts down and talk it out by giving an answer/solution in a positive light, thus taking its power over you away. Negative thoughts will breed crippling anxiety.
 
Thank you Iron. I also quit smoking today, I picked up the nasty habit a year ago after 22 years with no smoking... out of the blue. Worst thing I have ever done. It has contributed to my anxiety 10 fold. I have stopped off and on over teh past few months with the patch for a few days and I have no issues.
 
Well as some of you know, I am ready to go cold turkey starting Monday. I was off the oxycodone for 4 days 2 weeks ago but I had to go back on because I could not call in sick for work. I am on vacation so I have the time to detox myself and work on what I need to do to be successful.

Quick recap of my habit. I have been off and on ( mostly on ) oxy/hydro aroumd 50-80 mgs a day for 10 years. I went to detox in January and was on suboxone until August. I did very well on suboxone. I was at 1.5 mgs a day for most of the time.

I relapsed stupidly in August. It was something I could have avoided and in no way do I feel defeated about it and hopeless. It just made me realize what I have to do to further myself in sobriety, and it is completely doable.

I went to the grocery store tonight and got what I need. Gatorade, water, soups, fruit and oatmeal. Medication wise, I have arabien and xanax available. I have never abused either of these drugs and I take them so seldom. I actually do not like benzos at all, but I figure for a few days I will need to take them to get ahead of the anxiety and to help me sleep for just a little bit.

I am so tired of the opiate usage. I have not enjoyed it for the last year. Every dose made me anxiety riddled and brought my self esteem done to zero. I am looking foward in turning over a new leaf again and I am ready to work on my mental health during this time. I will be posting over the next few days to help me get through this difficult period, which for me, usually subsides around the 72 hour mark.
 
Congrats on quitting smoking! I don't want to make it seem like you shouldn't quit smoking but... one thing at a time, Musicman.

If you find yourself stressing with cravings to smoke, pick a day in the near future to quit. You don't want to be battling two separate cravings. I learned this while in Rehab. It didn't make sense at first, but then I noticed that the ones who were trying to quit smoking (along with quitting their drug of choice) had the worst anxiety of us all.

Quitting smoking is one of the hardest things a person will ever do. It's such a part of our day, our routine, mentally, socially etc. Keep busy, remeraber to eat well, drink lots of fluiRAB and keep posting!

Good luck, and I hope you have a great week!

emsmom
 
Actually, the patch gives me a buzz and a cleaner feel, so I really don't feel like smoking. I smoked 2 weeks ago during the 4 day cold turkey and I felt horrendous. I should be ok. I am really starting to get into anxious mode. I have 3 pills left and then all the fun will begin tommorow afternoon. I know alot of the withdrawals has to do with the mental state you are in so I am really going to concentrate on good thoughts.
 
Hi and congrats.
You sound determined. Until I really knew in knower that the negative aspects of using oxycodone way out weighed what the pills did for me, I couldn't quit. I used the Thomas Recipe too but also tapered. I have been clean since 9/30/10 and it feels great. I am free! It took awhile to detox (It's in my blog.) I still have nightmares sometimes. For 21/2 weeks or so I had horrible night terrors.

I don't miss the pills at all. I don't even think about it. The big step for me was to cut off my supply. I was getting them from my dr. since 6/04 and taking them every 4 to 5 hours, and it got to the point that every month I would take too many and then have to taper down until I got the next refill. So I called the Dr's office and told them to note in my chart not to give me any opiates any more. I didn't say why.
I have fibromyalgia and for a few weeks took tramadol as directed but got off of that too and am just taking aspirin as needed. I'm doin' great. One of the reasons I didn't want to permanently d/c getting them was that I was so afraid of pain flares. But so far so good.
I'm with ya. Keep postin' ok? Also, it really helped me to start a blog and check in every day. I felt accountable.
 
Hey Musicman,

You are on a great track to recovery. Your expectations are realistic and your goals are within reach.

I was a chronic relapser so I eventually started Suboxone and have been clean for over a year and a half now. I feel in control of my life for the first time in a very long time.

Take as little Arabien and Xanax as you can - just enough to help with sleep, otherwise you'll have to taper off those as well. The Arabien isn't too bad, but the Xanax is a benzo so just be vigilante about your usage.

Keep posting to let us know how you're doing. You know what's ahead, just keep your eye on the prize - and make sure to stay busy during detox.

Good luck,
emsmom
 
Good for you! Just try to keep busy. Make plans and stick to them, regardless of how you feel. The time will go by much quicker. It's tough to get motivated, very tough, however it will make such a difference if you're distracted from the withdrawals. You've done it all before and you know what to expect - that's the hard part. Try not to sit around "waiting" to see how bad it will get.

I hope it all goes smooth for you. Keep in touch.

emsmom
 
First of all, I wish you strength, fortitude, and success in your journey. Secondly, may I ask why you were prescribed Opiates in the first place?

Please keep us informed daily if possible; we all would like to watch you walk from the darkness and be in the light for good.
 
I still have a few doses left of oxycodone, but of course the anxiety about the looming withdrawals is already starting to kick in. Keeping a strong minRABet is key to getting through this, but I am definitely in anxiety mood. I know one week from tonight I will be feeling much better.
 
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