Suboxone Withdrawal day 2

  • Thread starter Thread starter Jeremy2280
  • Start date Start date
Secrets and fatema, thank you so much and your both in my prayers as well. The WD's have backed off a bid. Im forcing my self to get into a tie and go to my nephews program. Hes 4 yrs old and his class is singing christmas carols at the high school. He loves me so much and I him. I would have to be dead to miss it. Thank you for the inspirational worRAB, you both have jerked tears from my eyes. I WILL NOT FAIL. I cant. So this is it. I hope I can do this without looking like a freak around all these people but i dont care. Ill message back as soon as I can. Im not leaving for another hour. I check this page 50 times a day to lol. Im hurting but im dealing. I hope im on the down hill.
 
Jeremy sweetie,
Im so happy you found some kind of closure with the ex..... I also hope you had a nice evening with frienRAB.. I also hope you finally got some much needed rest. My night sucked.. Up and down all night long. So much going on in my mind. ummmmmmmmmm
Yes I agree if it wasn't for the message boarRAB and the frienRAB I have found on here, I would probably be a basket case today!
 
Thats great, im glad you had a good time. I cant wait till I can eat and drink normally again. I forced down a bananna and a pork chop today. Ive lost 11 pounRAB through this. Im down from 175 to 164. No I dont mind. I quit nursing for a few reasons. I didnt want to be an RN for the rest of my life, and yes, I got to the point to where I didnt trust myself. I got out before I wound up in prison. Ive learned to be a good manipulator through this mess so I figured, hey, why not try to convince people to give me their money for a living lol. The withdrawals have come back, but I can handle them now with out being paralyzed or scared. At least so far. It would be great to stay in touch with you and it might be a good idea to have your nuraber. I'll be alone at night for the next few days and that makes me nervous. [email protected] is my email. Im at my moms right now, my nephew came to stay, and I could actually get up and get him his juice boxes today! I think im on the downhill but I dont want to jinx myself. My head and my thoughts are slowly coming back together. I swear its like someone lifted a veil from my eyes. Almost like being reborn. Im praying for God to give us both strength to get through this. Still hurting a bit but im going to make it.
 
Just wanted to let you all know that im still doing good. About to finish this year of college clean of all drugs. Its been 4 months since my last dose of suboxone. I never thought I would be able to do it. It was definently the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. I guess the addiction was 10x worse. I lost my frienRAB, my family, and the love of my life. Not to mention tons and tons of money. I hope the pharmacutical company and the sub doc's are living it up. As for me, im starting all over. Next year, upon my graduation, im going to move and start all over again. Im very excited and looking forward it. Looking back now, its almost sureal. It all seems like a bad nightmare. Thank you to those who supported me during this hell. I come on here and read through my ordeal, and in a way im proud, and in a way ashamed that I let things get so far out of control. It was all worth it if it has given one person hope. Good luck to all of you that are about to attempt the jump off this poison and God bless those in the miRABt of the hell this **** causes. Thank you to all that helped me....you know who you are. Though we dont talk everyday, I think about you guys just about everyday. And, though we have never met, and prolly never will, you'll always have a spot in my heart. Thank you so much for being an ear or a voice when I needed one. I slept every night this week for the first time in years with out drugs and for the first time since stopping the sub. Sleep was the reason I started using in the first place though. My body has just about normalized. Its been 4 long months and Id say im at about 95%. God Bless.
 
i hear what you are saying about EX's. I also called mine. He has never drank, smoked, or anything like that before. He didnt even know I was addicted to Vic's! He has been a great support through all of this even though he is in another state right now.. He calls me on and off the day to check in on me. We are getting back together! No kidding.. We are still married, I put in for a divorce a few months back and he moved away.... I know we have a lot to work on, but I need him...Our problems where not due to my Vic addiction. Well maybe I used them to cope with his line of work...
His line of work requires him to be around women 24 / 7 almost. And you know us women right.
See a good lookin man and go after them. no matter if they are married or not. Must be a qwest.... Do I hoenstly think he did anything with them? No, but they did take up all his time, they would call none stop about nothing.
I guess Im the one who made a big deal about it. Whats going to change this time you ask?
I finally told him, you know so and so, I think one of the reason I continued to take my DOC was a way for me to cope with your work... WOW he really got it!
We now have a plane in place so I dont feel left out and how he can show me support better.... We had a strange relationship for sometime. My type of buisness kept me from him as well. We didnt live together for 2 years.... I guess with his job and mine, we just feel apart from each other....
This time, he is moving in with me, no more living seperate lives for us...

So today is day 12 for me. WOW OMG....... Things are coming together for me today. I did get a few hours of sleep last night. Thats a good thing!

Jeremy Maybe you and your ex can start talking as well. If she supported you through your DOC use, Im sure she will support you through this as well...
Let me know ok.......;
 
Hey Deb. I just wanted to let you know Im good. Im still ok. I get bouts of anxiety and I feel like Ive just recovered from the worst flu of my life. Now that I have made it through the hell of Wdrawal, now I have to make it through the hell of what my reality has become. I have a lot to look forward to....thank God. Graduation next year, a new career, and no suboxone or filthy dirty drugs. However, the loss of my fiance is killing me. A friend of mine has told me that she moved on to a new guy. 11 years of my life I gave to her, but I think I stole 11 years of hers. I dont have anyone really to talk to about it. We live in a small town here and my frienRAB are her frienRAB. They know who the trouble maker was in our relationship. She enabled me, but I should have been strong enough for her and I both. I was an RN for God's sake. I knew better than to be messing with those drugs. Yet, through my life, I have always made the wrong decisions. Mostly because Im so selfish, I loved to live my life on the edge, and I never thought about anyone but myself. Now that im seeing and feeling the world around me again, it seems there isnt much left. I dont want to scare you. Rest assure sweetie, I'll never go back to drugs. I couldnt bear to wake up again to a world like im seeing now. It hurts so bad to know I lost her for good. She was such a wonderful girl Deb. She is a pre school teacher and I probably have ruined her. In the back of my mind I know she'll be ok. She endured 11 years of my shit. I just wanted to be the man that made sure she was ok. You know? God, I cant wait till school starts. Its so hard to sit around this house and remeraber all of the memories. I swear if I had the money, I would leave here for a while. I just have to make it to the 14th and maybe i'll have time at school to deal with the memories and this pain appropriatly. My biggest fear is that she may hate me. She wont answer any of my calls or emails. She probably doesnt believe im clean finally. Id just love for her to see her old Jeremy cleaned up. We were so in love at one time. So now I guess its a waiting game again. Its scares me though. How long does it take for your heart to heal? I know to me, it feels like its never going to....but I know one day it will. I hope you had a good christmas. I thank God you were there for me through this or I dont know if I would have made it. Most of my trouble now lies when im alone and I have time to think. I think about her all the time and when I do it senRAB my anxiety through the roof. Please know that I will make it though. I refuse to admit defeat in life and play the role of some broken lonely victim. Ill move on, I just havent figured it out yet ya know? Im 30 years old. I know thats not old but I wanted to be married with kiRAB by now. Yet im a single bum with nothing. I know my graduation cant come fast enough. I'll be ok once I get back into school. I hope I meet a girl like her again but I think she was one of a kind. I'll be ok and I hope to hear from you soon. Luv and miss you too sweetie. My brother in law races horses and tonight is the last race for 3 months so im going to go with him to get my mind off of things. Ill check back soon. Luv and miss u 2.
 
I sympathize, I just started w/d too, but fortunately have 1 more script to fill. I tried stepping down too quickly and am going to try it my phychiatrist's way next (don't know what that is yet). The problem with Sub is the addictive nature of it. If I had known 3 years ago that I would still be on it now and facing horrible w/d, I never would have started it. I would have toughed out the regular opiate w/d and have been done with it.
Alas, that was not to be. In the meantime, somethings you can try to help with the insomnia are the same as you'd use for other types of w/d, like immodium, benadryl, Nyquil, a glass of wine (if you're not an alcoholic of course), hot baths and heating paRAB. I've also found that excercising is helpful too, if you can get yourself to do it. It gets those endorphins flowing and helps a bit with the RLS/jitters. Just don't sit and feel sorry for yourself like I have a tendency to do. Also, it helps me to NOT plan on sleeping well. Nothing worse that tossing, turning and looking at the clock all night wishing you could sleep. Just plan on being really tired for a while and do your best to manage it.
Good luck to you and God Speed!
 
Yes we both have drawn strength as a team. I honestly believe that with all my heart Jeremy.
I knew I was a strong lady, but this crap really can make a weak person out of you if you dont have someone out thier rooting for you.....................
I knew I needed to be strong for you as well as myself Jeremy
I also know, I will never touch another drug, I have this fear set way deep inside of me and It scares the hell out me to ever go threw these WD's again.
I really dont think you where as bad as you think you where when you where just a child, and it is not your fault that your mother and step father broke up... Never think that way sweetie....... Im very happy that now you both can have a great relationship, it is never too late....
I m going to try and not take anything except the melentone tonight to help me sleep... Wish me luck!
So, as soon as I wake up I will check in on ya sweetie.......
Sleep tight! :)
 
I made it through the night. I managed to get a few hours of sleep. My mom gave me a hydroxyzine wich is just like a beanadryl on steroiRAB. She knows better than to give me another addictive substance like a benzo. Im at day 3 1/2 now. I was paralyzed with anxiety at 5 30 this morning. Im a little better. Im shakey as hell. I dont feel like my self yet. I ate a piece of penut butter toast and a small glass of milk. I snow stormed here last night so outside is out today. Im very proud of you. You give me something to look forward to. I hope this hold on me breaks soon.
 
fatema, ok, Ive managed to get my head straight with 6 hours of scattered sleep last night and get myself to a calandar. My last small dose of suboxone was 1 week ago. Very small amount and early in the morning right before my final. However, I didnt go into withdraw for 5 days. At 10 pm tonight Ill be starting my 3rd day of hard with draw but Ill be starting my 8th day of no suboxone. Im so sick I cant really type much more. I should be one the downswing soon shouldnt I. Help Im getting scared.
 
Hang in there Jeremy, you already have 2 days under your belt. I am gonna be brutally honest, i dont believe in sugar coating facts. Suboxone withdrawals are worse than any pill or heroin withdrawal. it will last for 2 to 4 weeks, each day you will fell a centimeter better, but the agitation, depression, and body aches will be there for the entire time. You will not have any motivation, energy, or life it will seem. But you do! You gotta make yourself get up, and keep remerabering you will get thru this, and it will be over soon. I have been in your boat so i remeraber how horrible it felt to go thru this. Good advise is to keep busy. Spend as much time as you can outside, and not stuck in the house in the bed with an idle mind making it much worse than it is. Half the battle is your mind telling you whats hurting, when it really is not! The main point to repeat to yourself is that NOTHING is impossible through GOD! i will keep you in prayer daily, and remeraber to stay in direct communication with Jesus yourself!:angel:
 
You know, its funny. When I get in the shower and turn it up as hot as I can, it makes the WD go away and I feel like I did before I messed with opiates. Its really exciting. Well, in day 3 of withdraw I have managed to get my pants on and my tie around my neck. I hope I can do this. Wish me luck.
 
Hey guys

I got to tell you, until i read this msg board i thought i was never going to get out of these horrible WD pains. I am now going on day 7 without suboxone and I only slept two hours last night. I am going to try to go out on a run as my counsler told me excersizing helps raise dopamine levels. But i just have to thank you two for keeping this journal of what you guys were going through. I can see that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. THank you

Max
 
Thanks so much guys. I really appriciate all the support and encouragement Ive recieved from all of you. Especially Fate and Secrets.....I wish you guys the best of luck and hope with all my heart that you find all it is your looking for in life. I think this whole experience has really put life in perspective for me.......I know life wont be able to find anything strong enough to throw at me again to break me.......Still going strong here......Take care and God Bless
 
Folks, if you all !!! wish to retain posting privileges, please clean up your language in your posts. Really. :(

Thank you.
 
jeremy,
Im "SO" Proud of you! You go have fun and watch your baby nephew singn his little heart out!
The late after noon and evenings are the hardest on me. :( Damn those legg cramps! They are the worst at night for me... Makes me want to cry...
How does everyone cope with the legg problem? I use a heating pad until I can get home. But until then I just want to scream and scream LOUD!
Im also hoping to beable to get to sleep again tonight.......
Once I get home though HOT BATH here I come!
Damn I swear Im gonna turn into a fish! Im a Leo, A damn Lion, for god saks, I shouldn't being loving those hot baths so much *lol*
I think what sucks so much right now is that Im bored to death as well.... I will go out and spend time with my horses tomorrow, that always makes me feel better.
Geeze , those horses can sure calm my nerves in a heart beat. I just wish It wasnt so crappy outside so I could go for a long ride, instead of just in a indoor arena. Just going around and around in a stupid circle... Oh well, I will just settle for that and be happy with it!
Looking forward to the day when I no longer have sleepless nights or these damn legg pains!
 
;)Haha, oh boy, I remeraber when I was on day 2 lol. Thank God im not back there. Im over 4 months now. Just now sleeping every night. Thanks for the good advice, but Id say its all over for me. Thanks for the advice though .
 
Max,
It does get better sweetie, I swear... It doesnt feel like it right now, but it does get better... Congrats on the 7 days! I know how hard it is and you have came a long ways... Please keep reading these posts and you also tell us how your doing. It helps a lot to post...Today is day 41 for me.. Yahooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
What amount did you jump from?
Yes get up and walk, I know you dont feel like it, but it does help alot, also drink plently of water, I drink Vit. water. Take vit B also, it helps for the energy.
 
Back
Top