It's so hard, as many of us who attend this board and are recovering addicts can attest. I wish I could give you comfort, and tell you this is why your son does it. That the addiction is a teenage phase he will grow out of. But I can't.
As a recovering crystal meth addict, I don't know what drove me to do it. In the beginning, when I was in my early 30's, I'm almost sure it started out as "fun", an innocent high. But at some point it must have changed. It became some other high, some other reason. “Fun” was replaced by an addiction and I didn’t know it. That’s why I tell you, your son’s recovery or choice to recover, is his own. He has to figure out what his "fun" was replaced with. The problem is, that can take time....many years for some of us.
You can cry! You can threaten! You can go as far as “cutting him off”. But you can’t stop him till he’s ready to stop. He has to find bottom at a point where he has enough sanity to realize where he’s at. I was 47 by the time I found mine.
My thoughts are with you and him.
doingfine