Started cold turkey yesterday.. have a question now

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Orangejuice22

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Hello.. I went cold turkey about 3 years ago.. it was horrible. I truly had thoughts of just wanting to die. I have been back on them for about 2 years due to a cancer episode. I had surgery in May. Treatments are over and I am going to be fine. Of course I started misusing the hydrocodone and have gotten up to 10 a day. I decided to just stop yesterday and dumped them in the sink. I took my last at 10am yesterday. I have had diarrhea pretty bad. Last night I had the jittery feeling and sat in the bath awhile. Today I am tired.. still have diarrhea and am very emotional. My question is this.. did I just get lucky? Is there more to come? Its been 32 hours and I feel okay. Just wondering has anyone else ever had this happen? Thanks in advance.
 
Hello Orangejuice,

Welcome :) There is a chance that you've experienced the worst. Everyone is different, and every detox/cold turkey will be different depending on how much/how long you abused your pain pills.

Try not to think of it too much. Stay busy, make plans, go outside and get fresh air. Another thing I found very helpful was to keep a journal of how you feel, so you can refer to it in the future. I frequently read through mine and realize how far I've come. I think it is an excellent part of my recovery (it helps me stay on track!).

The only thing I will stress is... If you're done the worst of the w/d's, your "addict brain" may tell you that you can do this again, since it wasn't "so bad." It is very important to stay vigilante regarding your addiction. The addict brain is very sneaky and will try to get the best of you (and very well may win!).

Do you go to NA, have an addictions counsellor/doctor or have someone to talk to regarding staying on track? I would suggest you pick something, as it is very hard to do on your own.

I hope your w/d's come to an end very soon - keep in touch over the next few days and let us know how things go.

Hope you have a better day tomorrow :)

Sincerely,
emsmom
 
Thanks for all the advice and I will start keeping a journal. I do want to go to na very badly. I am on my own here. No one knows and I can't tell anyone. The career that I have would totally be taken away if anyone was to ever find out. There is an na here but I am in such a small town that it would be all over if I went. I am not married and live alone so I am basically on my own here with it. I know that I cannot go back to that behavior. So I must stick with this. Thanks so much for your response and I will keep in touch. Just so you know, today has been another pretty good day. I still have some diarrhea and had some restless legs last night but all in all its ok. I am getting out of the house today for awhile. I have to go to work tomorrow. Again, thanks for your help and hope to speak with you again soon.
 
OJ,

My pleasure :) This is my way of giving back. When I first joined three years ago, I was a wreck. There were some wonderful people who helped me (some of them are still here) through my dark days. Now, I couldn't be happier. I am in a great place regarding my recovery, and that's my wish for you - to come out on the other side, and take charge of your recovery. Life on this side is great - so you're welcome :)

Regarding NA - I completely understand. I have read posts from other people who went to neigrabroadoring towns to find NA groups, so they weren't in their small town (and potentially get "outed"). Although NA is 100% anonymous, you really never know, so it makes sense that you are reluctant to go to the one in your town. I was in Toronto, Canada when I first started NA (We now live in North Carolina - my husband and I moved to NC three months ago from Canada) and I assumed I wouldn't run into anyone I knew in such a huge city (seven million people) but I did meet people I knew (actually, quite a few people). One of those was my brother's ex girlfriend. She and I talked a bit but I found out a couple days later that she called my brother and asked him about my addiction. At that point in time, he had no idea (only my parents and husband new about my addiction). So, I'm sure you can imagine how upset that made me. Anyhow, take a look into some neigrabroadoring towns. Perhaps you'll find one you feel comfortable going to. It is very important that you don't do this alone, OJ, very very important. What about your doctor? Is she/she aware of your addiction? There are many addiction doctors/counsellors in the U.S. so perhaps you can find one to talk to. Your family physician really should know about this - you'd be surprised how helpful they can be. "Most" docs will not judge you. Having your family physician be aware of your addiction is probably the best thing you can do, as he/she will always have it in your file.

Take Imodium for the diarrhea. It will supress the stomach pain as well. I am so glad to hear that today is better. You are very lucky this time. Don't ever forget that.

Getting out today is a great idea. Keep very busy. Walking will help the restless legs, as well as a hot bath with epsom salts. You'd be surprised how much that helps.

Now, here's an important question. Are you able to get more pain pills from your doctor? You flushed the rest of your script a few days ago, however can you just "make a call" and get more?

I hope your have a great day. Keep in touch. I'm always here to help :)

emsmom
 
hi OJ!
i just wanted to say hi! and also say that i have had both type of withdrawals... i've had awful ones from percocets where i cant believe what i've done to myself... and other times where they really weren't that bad. so, if you need another reason to keep yourself on track, what emsmom says is totally true, you got totally lucky, which is awesome. but you never know if you go down that road again if you will get bad withdrawals next time. soooo....it's better to not find out! :)
good luck on your journey! and congrats on having your treatments be over and getting a good report that's your gonna be fine! that's some good news! yay!
 
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