Solution to arguing in a long term relationship, or suggestions?

C

Charlie

New member
Me and my girlfriend have been in a four-year relationship since we are 13; we've pretty much grown up together, but have always gone through periods of really bad arguing, to the point where we're sick of each other.
However, recently this seemed to be going on for too long and we mutually split up because it was just grating on both of us.
Now we're in this kind of relationship limbo where we're both making love all the time and really enjoy each other's company, but still argue and are still technically single.
The root cause of this whole situation is the arguing- any ideas on how to stop arguing so we can maybe get back together?! Bearing in mind we both openly acknowledge we still love each other and really want to be with each other.

It's just this god damn arguing!!!
 
What do you guys argue about? Does it seem to be about something in particular or just dumb things? If it is something that keeps getting brought up you guys need to address it and get everything out, resolve it, or agree to disagree...
If it is mostly about dumb day to day stuff then be the one who does something silly when it starts getting too serious. Turn the situation around as soon as it starts going south....be the better person. Hopefully she will start to realize you two are being silly and start doing the same.

Otherwise, you might have to accept your personalities just clash and you are not right for eachother....although you aknowlegde you have strong feelings for eachother. Good luck!
 
when you think you're right agree with her instead of saying she is wrong. she will find out she is wrong eventually.
 
First I think you need to look at what are the things that you argue about. And once you can understand why you argue about those things then you need to be able to talk about it without arguing. And you both need to ask yourselves how can you solve that problem. People that cannot communicate usually argue a lot. Try to communicate. Find out what she expects of you. And tell her what you expect of her. If there are things that you find too hard to talk about and you know that you are going to argue then go for coffee because you know that if you are at a coffee shop you will talk and not argue. You could also invite friends of yours to help you with this problem. Sometimes having a third-party will help in seeing things differently. But do something.

There is also one thing that you need to do and that is to evaluate your relationship. You guys started to date at a very young age and maybe your feelings for each other are starting to change. Maybe you both want to live the life of a single person so you can have fun while you are still young. Is it possible that don’t know how to tell each other that maybe you need time apart from each other because you’re afraid to admit to that? There is something that makes you argue and you need to get to the bottom of it before you destroy your feelings for each other.
 
when you think you're right agree with her instead of saying she is wrong. she will find out she is wrong eventually.
 
Everybody argues. Its just a part of relationships.
Maybe you two should start listening to one another instead of always yelling at each other.
It sounds like your having a hard time communicating to each other. If you cant communicate then your arguements are going to continue.
Next time an arguement starts stop and take a look at it. Whats the problem and why? How can you resolve it peacefully together rahter then ending up mad at each other?
 
Everybody argues. Its just a part of relationships.
Maybe you two should start listening to one another instead of always yelling at each other.
It sounds like your having a hard time communicating to each other. If you cant communicate then your arguements are going to continue.
Next time an arguement starts stop and take a look at it. Whats the problem and why? How can you resolve it peacefully together rahter then ending up mad at each other?
 
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