My husband and I have been married 6 months but we have been together for about 5 years. We usually get on really well but in the last year on occassions for some reason he gets all worried about sex, he is so insecure about it and then he gets angry and blames me.
This has happened about 5 times in the space of a year and it was really bad a couple of months ago because he said some very mean things to me, saying it was all my fault. I actually took note of the things he said and I have been trying to make an effort. Everything had been really good I thought but then the other night I was a bit tired and we were mucking around and it didnt seem to work out well and he got so upset and stressed and angry, he started saying he wasnt sure why and then he said that it is because I dont do anything and he has to ask me to do everything. He says I dont ask him to do anything and he doesnt feel like he turns me on etc... I was obviously crying my eyes out because like I said he has said simular things to me in the past and to be honest last time it took me months to stop being angry about it. I said that he should be more tactful and not talk to me like that and that what he was saying cant be entirley true because I have done a few "dirty" things recently and he is only being negative.
He has only slept with me and I think one other girl once so he always uses that as his excuse for being worried and unsure, it is like he thinks I should be the experienced one but I have only slept with 1 of my x bfs.
I am so upset he said those things to me, I walked off crying because he was just getting more and more angry, about 5 minutes later he came and said sorry etc... I asked if he meant all the things he said and he said that he just said some of it because he was angry but I really just dont know.
I feel like I must be so bad. I personally think that I am fairly good, I am not a total goody goody we have looked at porn together and played with toys, mucked around in our back yard etc... But I guess if I am tired Im not exactly wild. I just have no idea why he got so upset, I keep thinking it is his own insecurities because we have great fun and then he sort of stops and isnt sure what position to do it in and asks me, sometimes I dont mind but other times I wish he would just do what he wants. I understand he is a bit unsure so I do try and help but when I am in the mood Im not thinking about what position, I am thinking about him.
I have no idea what to do? I cant keep being spoken to like this, I mentioned I was still thinking of some of the things he said to me last night and he said that that makes him feel bad and he said sorry so what else can he do?
I know he has a very stressful job and now is probably worse (but that is after he yelled at me) I just want to fix this problem, the way he reacted felt really out of the blue to me and I just feel like maybe he thinks I am boring everytime we have sex. I usually love it and always orgasm but I sometimes hate it when he is so insecure, maybe he feels the same about me because I am sometimes a little shy, I am happy doing anything to him but he wants to watch me bend over or whatever and it does make me feel a little shy.
Someone please help me? Is it me or is it him? I just dont want him to yell at me again.
Hi, I am a size 10, not skinny but not fat.
We have sex about every 2nd night. I iniate it probably 1/2 of that time
Jordan I have told him 100 times I like everything, I have also said the ones I like the most.
Allyn W you are probably right but the other night I tried to play a game for us both to say what we want and he said bend over thing I freaked out and then he got angry and asked why we have to play stupid games etc...
This has happened about 5 times in the space of a year and it was really bad a couple of months ago because he said some very mean things to me, saying it was all my fault. I actually took note of the things he said and I have been trying to make an effort. Everything had been really good I thought but then the other night I was a bit tired and we were mucking around and it didnt seem to work out well and he got so upset and stressed and angry, he started saying he wasnt sure why and then he said that it is because I dont do anything and he has to ask me to do everything. He says I dont ask him to do anything and he doesnt feel like he turns me on etc... I was obviously crying my eyes out because like I said he has said simular things to me in the past and to be honest last time it took me months to stop being angry about it. I said that he should be more tactful and not talk to me like that and that what he was saying cant be entirley true because I have done a few "dirty" things recently and he is only being negative.
He has only slept with me and I think one other girl once so he always uses that as his excuse for being worried and unsure, it is like he thinks I should be the experienced one but I have only slept with 1 of my x bfs.
I am so upset he said those things to me, I walked off crying because he was just getting more and more angry, about 5 minutes later he came and said sorry etc... I asked if he meant all the things he said and he said that he just said some of it because he was angry but I really just dont know.
I feel like I must be so bad. I personally think that I am fairly good, I am not a total goody goody we have looked at porn together and played with toys, mucked around in our back yard etc... But I guess if I am tired Im not exactly wild. I just have no idea why he got so upset, I keep thinking it is his own insecurities because we have great fun and then he sort of stops and isnt sure what position to do it in and asks me, sometimes I dont mind but other times I wish he would just do what he wants. I understand he is a bit unsure so I do try and help but when I am in the mood Im not thinking about what position, I am thinking about him.
I have no idea what to do? I cant keep being spoken to like this, I mentioned I was still thinking of some of the things he said to me last night and he said that that makes him feel bad and he said sorry so what else can he do?
I know he has a very stressful job and now is probably worse (but that is after he yelled at me) I just want to fix this problem, the way he reacted felt really out of the blue to me and I just feel like maybe he thinks I am boring everytime we have sex. I usually love it and always orgasm but I sometimes hate it when he is so insecure, maybe he feels the same about me because I am sometimes a little shy, I am happy doing anything to him but he wants to watch me bend over or whatever and it does make me feel a little shy.
Someone please help me? Is it me or is it him? I just dont want him to yell at me again.
Hi, I am a size 10, not skinny but not fat.
We have sex about every 2nd night. I iniate it probably 1/2 of that time
Jordan I have told him 100 times I like everything, I have also said the ones I like the most.
Allyn W you are probably right but the other night I tried to play a game for us both to say what we want and he said bend over thing I freaked out and then he got angry and asked why we have to play stupid games etc...