Should my mother in law be housing my husband?

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OceanicDiscoverer

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My husband and I are both 21 (young, I know). Have a 16 month old son. He abandoned us May 31, and now lives with his mom. At first he was at some shady friends houses (one was his sister's ex husband's). His mother manipulated him to come live with her and he has been there over a month now. Her stipulations for living with her were.

1. Help with utilities
2. Attend college
3. Work
4. Pay me child support
5. Visit his son.

Now. She doesn't see that he does any of those things, except attends college. He hardly pays child support (hearing end of Oct for that), Parties, comes and goes as he pleases, etc.

His mother says she won't tell him to get back home to me and our son because she doesn't want to "push him, as he is very hard headed".

I think he is a moocher who is getting a free ride and a child's lifestyle living with her.

Isn't it wrong what she is doing? How can I stop it? His sister who is against this whole thing and on my side said she is furthering his immaturity, but won't tell her to kick him out because "its her moms house".
 
If you're looking for someone to force him to go home to you, it's not going to happen. Is she right in housing him? That decision is between them. She is probably helping him out for the time being while you two decide what is going to happen and he gets his feet back on the ground. Most mothers do that, it's normal. I would concentrate on him paying the child support he owes. He won't have a choice with that once you go to court.
 
You cant control him you cant control her. He is a mamas boy and I guess she must like it. He isn't man enough to do the right thing by you and his baby apparently. And I dont mean he should just stay with you even if he is unhappy for whatever reason. But he needs to end things well with you, pay his child support and help raise his son in anyway he can. You cant make him be a man. I guess the next best thing is to make sure he pays you child support.
 
It sounds like he needs a reality check. He has no responsibilities whatsoever. You need to tell his mother right out (and no one said you had to be nice) that if she doesn't kick him out now he's never going to learn what its like to be a man. And you need to tell him that if he doesn't step up and move back in with you and help take care of his child then you're done with him. Tell him you're gonna look for another man who can full fill the "manly" duties. You need to show him how serious you are. good luck.
 
Perhaps it is time for you to wrap your head around the fact your husband is making a life without including you or his son. Make an appointment with a divorce attorney and keep it. Get on with your life...he has.
 
Hi,well your probably better off without him,the court will make him pay his way,but think of the mothers position,would you see your child roughing it out in some grubby kip,no you wouldn't,she is no different to any mother,blood is thicker than water.
 
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