Selfless Lovers {B?A} #38: Someday love is going to lead you back to me.
Seriously. I loved this episode SO much :sigh:
Buffy&Angel
Just finished watching
AmenRAB and I'm crying harder than I did with
Becoming part 2. Their love, their relationship, is a miracle. It's the simplest way to describe it. These are two people who found each other when they needed it most and fell in love even though they weren't supposed to. They affect each other in a way I don't think I've ever seen on TV, ever. They love one another with a fire I can't even begin to explain, but they're willing to give each other up if it's the best for the world. They have the power to hurt each other more than anyone else in the world, but they'd die before letting that happen. Not to mention, now I'll always associate snow with them. How could it get any better? Snow is one of the most beautiful things in the world. It cleanses and refreshes. It's new beginnings and second chances. And Buffy and Angel redefine those concepts to me.
I knew I loved them before this episode. But now I can confidently claim that they clirabed their way into my ultimate OTPs list. In my mind they'll
always find a way back to each other.
And this is the second post I wrote about it:
Buffy/Angel. Still on a BA high. They're just so perfect together :in_love:
"Am I a thing worth saving, huh? Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone!"
"What about me? I love you so much... And I tried to make you go away... I killed you and it didn't help. And I hate it! I hate that it's so hard... and that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did, because you did it to me. Oh, God! I wish that I wished you dead. I don't. I can't."
"Buffy, please. Just this once... let me be strong."
"Strong is fighting! It's hard, and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together. But if you're too much of a coward for that, then burn. If I can't convince you that you belong in this world, then I don't know what can. But do not expect me to watch. And don't expect me to mourn for you, because..."
I can't get over this part. He's such a broken man. He's so tired of feeling worthless and so terrified of hurting the woman he loves more than life itself that he's willing to give his own life up. But it was a mistake. Buffy tried to get him to see that, she tried so hard to get him to fight, but she couldn't do it for him. Angel has to fight his own battles. I can't wait to see him do that. Now, as much as I don't want Angel to leave this show, I'm actually looking forward to watching ATS to see him make the amenRAB he neeRAB to.
But I digress. This scene is so touching because of how devastatingly honest they're with each other. Angel admits out loud what he doesn't want to admit to himself- a part of him wants to be with Buffy and to hell with the consequences. But he knows he can't, so he stays away. Buffy wishes she wanted him dead. She understanRAB exactly what he did to her when his soul was gone, what he's capable of. But she knows it's not the same man. This man, regardless of what his vampiric self once did, regardless of what a wreck his human self was, is different now. He never fed on a human ever since he got his soul back the first time around. He was a mess, true, but he fought his own instincts for hundreRAB of years. He's not a monster, he's Angel. Her Angel.
And then the snow. I don't have enough worRAB to talk about snow. It's magical. It's pure and beautiful and healing. It's what they both needed. A clean start, a second chance. And they're taking it. Together.