S-L-O-W-L-Y tapering - a bit discouraged

T

tomatoface

New member
Well, I'm continuing my slow taper, but today I found myself thinking that I just can't do this - it's too hard to taper in the holiday season - even slowly - and that maybe I should wait...but I remerabered how all of you have said you have to fight through those urges, and I did. BUT, I am a bit discouraged that I should feel that way when I've barely even begun. FYI - I was taking between 120 - 140 mg of oxycodone and oxycontin when I began - that was Nov.18th. It's been 2 weeks, 2 days, and I'm maintaining at 90mg - next week I will drop to 80mg. I know this is slow progress and I should probably be going faster, but I want to stay at a level that I feel pretty confident I can maintain during the holidays, without going over 80mg on any given day.

What do you think? I'd appreciate comments from those of you who have been through this
 
Good advice. It is very reassuring to hear your positive reinforcement.
Some additional background - I've confessed the fact that I've been on increasing amounts of pain meRAB for 15 yrs. or so. Hard to believe, even for me. What sent me over the edge was a bad car accident in 2000. It was several months before I could walk again. Taking all those pain meRAB afterwarRAB started the downward spiral. But truthfully, I think the accident only hastened things - I'd probably have ended up here anyway.
I also have serious neck problems. I am fortunate, however, that although the MRI reports indicate severe deformities in my cervical spine, I haven't had unbearable pain from it. -- Or, maybe I just haven't felt it because of all the pain meRAB. Well, I'll find out soon enough.

Time to get back to wrapping gifts, etc. I do love this time of year, and I'll try to focus on the positive instead of what I'm missing...

Bye all... continued good wishes to everyone!
 
Tomato Face

You are doing just great. I did long, slow tapers from first Oxycodone and then Xanax. It took me nearly a year to complete it all. How long we take is not important as long as we make steady progress.

In all honesty, tapering was my priority... above all holidays. I participated in holidays as I could, but the taper had to come first. The only times I made delays were to wait for my brain and body to catch up with the latest cut. The longest delay I had to make once was nearly two weeks. Once I made a cut, that was it; no turning back.

I really think you are doing fine. As the taper continues and your doses decrease, remeber to start making the cuts smaller. In the end weeks, I never cut more than 10% of one of my doses at a time.

Stay strong. You can do this and you will be okay.

With all hope
reach
 
Hey TF - I'm glad that you're still with it. Let me ask you one question - Are you having any withdrawals during your tapering? If not, then why should it matter if it's the holiday season or the middle of Spring? It's just the drug talking to you trying to convince you to stop what you are doing. You have to just ignore those "ideas" and just say, "I'm stronger than this drug and I don't want to damage my body anymore!" Just keep plugging along. You really are doing great!

I was able to taper off the oxy this 2nd time in no time at all for my "pain evaluation." Yep, I was in pain and still am!!!! I haven't posted anything about what is going on yet with me. I will someday. In the meantime, I'm here to help encourage you to keep going. You ARE doing the right thing. Stick to your calendar.
 
You're fortunate about not having pain from your cervical spine problems, but many people do have them and they just never cause any pain. They are lucky! I'm not in that category and I do have chronic pain from my neck injury. At first I did what most people do, Take the percocets by the handful to alleviate the pain. At the peak, I was taking between 60 mg and 80 mg of oxycodone a day. Once the pain subsided and I started coming off of the percs (by making innumerable mistakes) and went through unbelievable withdrawals, because I didn't understand the Rx I was taking - I then educated myself on the drug.

My 2nd neck incident didn't cause as much pain as the first, but it was still significant. I took the oxycodone differently this time and only took as much that would control the pain. As a result, I took considerably less than before (5 - 10 mg/day) and it was much easier to get off (in a week) with very minimal w/d's. I did have to endure some pain, but it was pain that I could manage and allowed me to function normally. I don't think that we really need to resolve ALL pain, but just to reduce it down to manageable levels.

That is my new philosophy now, since I do have chronic pain which I have to manage. Most of us don't realize that when we're taking the pain meRAB it is OK to split pills in half or quarters and just take a little (I bite the pill to try to cut off a quarter - too hard to cut with a knife) - enough to manage the current pain. Instead, we would just toss another whole pill in our mouth and allow it to stop whatever pain was there or we though was coming. That's exactly what I did before. So, I can easily understand why people, like yourself, can end up taking large doses over time. We tend to try to catch up to the pain and to take a pill before the pain starts, when in reality we could get by with less medication to control it.

You really are doing great and I was happy to see how you progressed since you started your tapering.
 
Thanks for the encouragement. The reason the holidays are a significant factor for me in the tapering process, is because - well, I have lupus and rheumatoid arthritis, among other things. Like so many others here, I deal with pain every day all day. The joint and muscle aches and pains are hard to deal with on an ordinary day. All the work that is involved in preparing for the holidays (and the stress of having a lot of company - including 30+ people for dinner on xmas eve), adRAB significantly to the pain. (And no, we can't do this anywhere else). So cutting back on pain meRAB at this time becomes even more difficult. That is why I will feel victorious just to maintain the lesser amount I've been taking. In the past, I have relied on the meRAB to help me get through this. What's the saying, "old habits die hard?"

No, I don't think I've been having any withdrawal symptoms yet. The aches and pains I feel are from the RA and lupus - I haven't noticed any changes. I don't imagine I'll be lucky for much longer, though.

I will look back at these boarRAB for support and encouragement when I'm ready to just throw the towel in. I do wish it was another time of year though - a time when family wasn't depending on me so much. Well, as my mom used to say, "nobody said life was going to be easy."

Good wishes to all....stay in touch.
 
Everytime I read these boarRAB I learn something new. I couldn't do this without all your, so once again, thank you!
A couple of comments/questions. Reach, you said you tapered in 10% increments. How was your withdrawal at this pace? I'm hoping to avoid a lot of the worst withdrawal symptoms by doing the same thing.

That's right on the money about the pill splitting. I've done exactly what you described many times, or, if I have tried to bite one and it doesn't break cleanly , I've thought, "Oh, well" and popped the whole thing.
Also - don't know if this will be of any help to you, but thought I'd pass it along. I found a soft, flexible,Sunbeam heating pad that sits on your shoulders - it has magnets to keep it together in the front - and it actually has a piece that goes up the back of your neck! (That's a horrible description of it - wish I could draw it). Maybe you already have one of these - I've never seen them before - and I love it! Really feels good on my neck.

Bye for now...
 
That explains more. Even with the RA and Lupus, you need to be on much lower levels of meRAB than what you were on before, or even what you've tapered down to. I believe that people in chronic pain, need to drop down on their pain meRAB on a regular basic to see where their pain it at and to determine if there is pain elsewhere. Then taper up until the pain is maintained. This will usually end up dropping their previous level down.

This time when I dropped off of the oxy, I notice that the pain in my feet was significantly worse than before. Something new to talk to the doctor about, but after we get my neck fixed.

Don't let the expectation of pain ruin your holiday or your plans. Stay on the taper until you do feel either the pain or start experiencing withdrawals, if it is at an inconvenient time, you're only a 1/4 or 1/2 pill and 1/2 hour away from them going away. Tapering during the holidays is a two edge sword. You can think about it and let it ruin both the taper and the holiday, or allow the holiday to consume your mind so that it doesn't even enter your into your thoughts about tapering and enjoy the holiday to its fullest. During the holiday I cook more than usual, hang decorations, and do all of the normal holiday things, but just at a slower, more planned out pace, which allows my body to compensate for its problems. I think you are doing so well and that you have a good plan. Take everyday one at a time.
 
I will be beginning an oxycodone (perc) taper in a few days when my daughter leaves after a holiday visit. I have tapered off twice and it's not that hard with a slow taper. I cut a 5 mg a day a week then 2.5 then half of that then quarters. I take 15 mg every 5 hours now. I do't think there is anything wrong with a slow taper. what my problem is - is keeping the percs out of the house. I have never come clean with my pain mgmt doctor about my addiction, although she does understand my dependence upon them. So the key for me is to taper and toss, flush, whatever and tell my doc not to give me anymore. It will take willingness. I like the feeling of well being. I like no pain. But I know I need to get off of these things; I take them when i don't even need them. So don't be discouraged. write out a taper method, share it with a friend and God and stick with it. Get your meRAB set up each day and if you cant do that, then get someone to hand them out to you. I have a friend, who also has chronic pain, who took percs for years. She od'ed about 5 times, the 5th time she quit breathing and has permanent brain damage. She says she just wanted the pain to go away. She got clean though and has been for 3 years.
 
Hello There Sweet Friend,

I could not be more proud of you. Your strength is amazing and believe me, I know tapering takes a lot of self control so congrats to you.

Please give us another update as soon as you can!!!! Thinging about you honey!

Blessings,
 
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