Roommates from HELL!

C

Callan D

New member
TL;DR

Those of you who do not want to read all of that, read this.

All out roommate warfare. I found this quirky little list and posted a thread about it here , but I hope to do quite a few of these things and take photos / videos of what I can, and make this a photo journal of the hell I can put them [roommates] through...legally of course.

So I give you, hopefully, the roommate war photo thread. Feel free to post your own pictures of the seventh circle of hell you create. :D




So, me and two other guys have a one year lease on this awesome three bedroom apartment five minutes from where I work. It's great, our downstairs guy is deaf, and across the way is two (Beautiful) girls that hang out with us and pretty much let us get away with any noise we might make. Things are awesome, right?

Wrong.

(First off, I don't want anyone to get the impression I'm habitually dirty or lazy, I'm pretty clean, but not perfect. I might have an empty can or two on my desk, but never twenty. I might have a pair of socks on the bathroom floor, but never a pile. I might not put dishes in the dishwasher, but never can you not use at least one of the sinks, and I almost always have one completely empty. I agree I might be a dick every now and then, never yelling or over the top like a frat boy idiot, but that's generally how I react to people asking me to do things that are ridiculous.)

Never move in with roommates. You run the risk of them not having their penis and balls intact, and instead replaced with a snatch, ovaries, and a hefty dose of pussiness. Apparently, when I fall asleep on the couch watching TV (and old habit of mine) and they wake me up, I'm mean to them. Mean is defined as not jumping up and hugging them saying thank you. It's 3 am on a Friday night, could I just sleep in peace or do you HAVE to tuck me in and kiss me goodnight.

Secondly, I don't put dishes in the dishwasher as they get dirty. I batch process. When one sink is full and the other is not, you rinse into the clean sink, then from that sink into the dishwasher. This idea perplexes them to the point of menstrating. The roommate I share a bathroom with gripes that I don't put my toothbrush in the toothbrush holder he bought so "we could both use it". I'm sorry, I set mine on my side of the sink, get the fuck over it.

Basically it's come down to me just being completely emotionless around them, probably since the first week. The one roommate with the bathroom issue has some serious control issues. The second one not so much, but he has "feelings", which is weird as hell for me to deal with. The "feeling" roommate, we'll call him Martha, is mainly upset about a comment two months ago when he was hanging mirrors, in which he asked me if two were level together. I said, "kinda". He said which one. I told him I don't know and this is a apartment full of dudes, does it really matter? He woke me up at 1 am on a tuesday (I work 8 - 5, M-F generally) to tell me this. They always fucking wake me up.

So, I've basically been conventionally ignoring my other roommates as much as possible, not making their lives hard, cleaning the dishes their way, and I even put my toothbrush in my drawer now. Hunkey Dorey right? Nope.

As of two days ago, the first...FIRST day of my three day vacation after working two weeks nonstop, doing front of house audio for four events (Basically 14 hour shifts when said and done on those days, 10's on the others), they tell me it's not working out. They say they don't appreciate me not "participating with them in living here", ie, being buddy buddy with them, and I need to be out on the first. I told them there is no legal way in hell they can do this, and I'm absolutely right, and that they can try to reconcile with me, or go back to the way it was.

(All the legal mumbo jumbo aside, we three signed as full tenants, 1 year lease. The only person who can evict me is the landlord, and she said they need to grow up, but that if they are serious about this, I should try to give some their way. Either way I have in writing about the incident that no eviction shall occur due to personal issues. It's called our lease. That's handled in small claims court, where they have no case since I've been taking a photo journal of the cleanliness issue and reporting the pictures to my landlord for witness.)

Anywho, now they're pissed that they can't control my life and where I live, and can't really live up to the reality of the real world of not getting along with everybody and just dealing with it. I guess they didn't realize what I was talking about when I protested about a one year lease vs six month for twenty bucks less rent a month. Bunch o' morons.

Now my life goal is to make their's as shitty as they've made mine. As surprised as I am at their audacity and ignorance to think they have the legal right to kick me out, I'm not really "hurt" by this. I have this weird feeling when they talk to me, awkward at best, but I'm not "mad" at them. It's like this sullen rage I can't tap into.

Low and behold, the rant is over, and now the point of this thread shall come to fruition. I have nine months left on the rent to get them to move out and find a replacement else I refuse to sign to release them from the lease. If they back out on the lease I intend to take them to small claims court and at the least dock them a few hundreds bucks and try my best to get this on their renting record.

How do I get them to move out? Simple. All out roommate warfare. I found this quirky little list and posted a thread about it here, but I hope to do quite a few of these things and take photos / videos of what I can, and make this a photo journal of the hell I can put them through...legally of course.

So I give you, hopefully, the roommate war photo thread. Feel free to post your own pictures of hell. :D
 
Seriously, you're going to be a full blown dick because they want you to put dishes in the dish washer as you use them?

Have you ever heard the term "Compromise"? I mean fuck, really? You can't see it clear to rinse and put the dish in the washer just out of common courtesy? How fucking childish are you? They aren't asking you to do THEIR dishes. It's a simple request and it's not some huge inconvenience for you.

The toothbrush thing is legit too. Maybe the kid doesn't want to touch your damn toothbrush that you put right next to the sink he has to use to wash his face. maybe he doesn't want to get soap or shit on it. Maybe the thought of it just grosses him out. And you can't see your way clear to maybe give a little?

I'm sure there's more to the story but maybe you could say "Hey dude, if I'm sleeping on the couch could you leave me there unless I'm in your way? I mean if I'm conked out there just lemme sleep."

Living with room mates requires compromise. It will never again just be the way YOU want it. You'll have to give in a little bit to what makes them comfortable too.

Frankly, from what you said, you're being a dick to live with.

My advice: Grow the fuck up and be a man about it.
 
Hey hey, it's been 3 months. I've compromised to hell and back and corrected all their complaints towards me for about 2 months now. Everything has been fine. I'm not rude, I'm not evasive, I'm not unfriendly. This is because they simply thought it was within their rights to kick me out because they outnumber me. It wasn't because life was hard, it was a popularity contest. I think that I should also not have to live with such restraints on my life. I should not have to worry about a fucking toothbrush lecture. I should not be told to do the dishes. You can ask, that's fine. They bark orders at me because I'm complacent and laid back. If you ask me, I've been walked on enough. If they want to reconcile with me, I'm more than fine with that and want to. They are stonewalling me and not talking to me more than I avoid them. They are essentially attempting to railroad me out, make me want to move. If you ask me, this is just fair game.

Keep in mind the term cleanliness is relative. Living with people shouldn't cater to the highest common denominator, nor the lowest. They keep me to the highest. Of course there's a million other things that they do that I let go by, financial things, privacy things, etc, that I chalk up to what happens when living with people.

And what I plan on doing isn't really "dick" stuff. It lies along more of mindfuck. Did you read the list? I won't do anything outrageous. I've already started construction in my room of a cave made of blankets. I won't do anything that would hamper their living experience in the communal areas.

I guess the pictures of the clean that is my apartment would help the thread. I'll be home soon enough.
 
All I ask is that you don't shit in their tubs or showers, you gotta use it to again and they just might leave it there for you to pick it up. Otherwise, funny list. Although I didn't read all of it...maybe I should be happy about that.

ANYHOO, it sounds like you did try to compromise. I had a roommate I had a tough time with. I do know what it's like to have a roommate that drives you crazy. I hope it gets worked out in the end and you find some peace of mind to live the way you feel most comfortable with. It's hard to live with one other person, I can't imagine living with more than one roommate that gives out trouble too.
 
Yeah, I figured there was more to the story that we can get from a single post. The dishes thing doesn't sound unreasonable to me at ALL. The Toothbrush thing also sounds like a perfectly reasonable request. But I'm sure there are other things going on that suck.

So do this. See if they can take over your portion of the lease. The landlord probably won't give a shit just as long as she gets paid. They can't kick you out but do you really want to stay in the situation?

Usually a landlord will let you out of a lease providing you find someone else to take over your portion of it. Once those documents are signed you're free and clear of the whole mess. In this case it sounds like that might make her life easier so she'd probably be all the more for it.
 
If it keeps up I'll do that. They've already offered to sign me off the lease, I just don't want to leave. The situation really isn't that bad to be honest, I just feel it's blown way out of proportion. I love my apartment. Love the people, management, location, neighboorhood, it's about the best place to live in this city with sub-1000 dollar rent. I'm trying to get them to adapt to the "we have to live together, we don't have to love each other" rule, and have them remember that they do not control what I do every waking minute because of "majority vote".

I take out the trash when it's my turn, I clean the mirrors, etc. I'm not a terrible person to live with. People comment us on how clean our house is. It's the nagging shit that gets to me, and the little shit I do that gets to them. I let all that nonsense go, say something about it when they say something about me, but I'm ignored and my claims are "ridiculous". I'm fine with living here. I'm definately not ok with being told I have to get out in 15 days. If they want to replace themselves, hey, awesome. Otherwise, we stick to the lease and move out when it's over, and that's completely ok with me too. I still have my 1500 dollar TV in the living room. Still let them use my laptop for the internet that I pay half of, because they felt it wasn't fair, it's my modem, router, pots, dishes, table, chairs, etc. I've contributed a great deal to this apartment for their use, and I'm not going to threaten to take it away, or take it away, because it's silly and petty.

I guess all I'm really asking is for some maturity in this house. I really exaggerate me being a "dick" to them. I more or so say it because people that are close to me wouldn't ever consider me this. I'm extremely generous with my life, time, and devotion to others. The OCD roommate got his bumper ripped off and I paid half the repairs out of pocket, no questions asked, because he's a friend. He paid me back over three months, and I've let him slide a week to pay me his share of electric twice now. It's really not a big deal at all to me. All I ask is for the same consideration for minor things around this household, and I'm just not getting that. That was really alright too until I was told I had to pack my shit and go, when they knew full well they had no right to tell me.

So thus I choose to take some fun out of this scenario to totally mindfuck the guys until we come to terms. If not, well it's hell lease as far as I'm concerned. I think I've given more than enough to be walked as far as willingly moving out of a great apartment because they just want me to. :mfinger:

(The toothbrush and dishes thing have been resolved for two months now. It's random petty stuff every now and then, really doesn't make any sense most of the time. Mad that I didn't do dishes when I went out of town to run sound for a concert for four days when on the third day it was my turn to do the dishes...but I was out of town. Oh there are so many bullshit stories to tell.)

From now on I'll try to keep posts to a minimum. They are stupidly long. I would post pics but alas, in my rush to GTFO of my office I forgot to put the battery I was charging for the camera INTO the camera. Meh, another day.

EDIT : Landlord is staying out of the situation, doesn't care what happens, etc. She was sued not too long ago and is not in the mood for it to happen again. She said we could go to small claims court but it would likely be dismissed. She said that the housing authority could do something about it, but it would end in either us reconciling and staying, or all of us going. So, err, I don't want to be evicted, or leave, and it's my right legally to do so.
 
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