F
FullCircle08
Guest
Well. Today has been a pretty good day. Almost NO WD symptoms and great day with my family. Sunshine, exrecise, working around the house, really helped out, but for the most part, I am in the clear from physical symptoms. I know when I first came on here (each relapse!) I would look for exactly how the person felt and how they got off the opiate. So I will review EXACTLY how it went for me. Remeraber, it will be different for all of you, but If you are taking Oxycontin, it wont vary to much.
Feb 22 --last day of abuse. I was using an 80MG plus a few Norcos at the time and starting around 10am -12pm each day.
Feb 23- went to the Drs and told him everything, he put me on a TAPER PLAN with 10mg oxy pills. Of course, if you know me, I always chicken out on COLD TURKEY (CT) and try and taper, but it never works. I had 42 pills to go 6 -6-5-5-4-4-3-3-2-2-1-1-1-1 (something like that). 6 pills ! that was great for the first days, then 5 was fine, but 4 sucked so, I cheated and took more, each night, then abused more and justified this by saying that I would just go CT on the weekend! Addict talking.
Feb 28th - pretty much ran out of pills that weekend. Went into some SERIOUS WD. Nothing like before, still not ER stuff, but bad. I had some benzo to help out but it really did nothing. I was suppose to go on a business trip on March 5th, so I thought (from past experiences with hydro) that 5-6 days after CT I would be OK. BOY WAS I WRONG.
March 3rd. I panicked. I was NOT feeling well. I had to call in both MONDAY and TUESDAY and I was NOT feeling better. I made a phone call to my "other" DR and got a script for Tylenol 3's. ps. I turned down hydro. I figured this would get me through the 5 days on the road and also the OXY WD's would be gone and WD from codeine is cake --RIGHT!! read on.....
Well, That night I abused the codeine, OF COURSE. Took like 7 of them. Dummy. and felt great. had an amazing day the next day and life was good. Look back at my post, I was happy again, but only fooling myself.
March 5th. Once the trip started, I got serious about the pills, knowing that I was only hurting myself. Each day i would wait as long as I could to take ONE PILL. I made it to about 2-3 oclock each day, but the scary thing was THAT DID NOT CHANGE. Around the 4 day into my trip I was still needing 2-3 pills to JUST GET BY. I was still not nervous, because I felt that the OXY WD were gone and i was only going to experience the WD from the codeine which at the amount I was taking 2-3 a day would be CAKE --YA RIGHT --read on.........
This brings me to MARCH 10th --Day 1 completely clean. No codeine since 9th at 5:00. Once the afternoon came, I knew I was in big trouble. WD symptoms were horrible and I felt like I was right back to stage one. Very frustrated I said, "strap em up D, its time to get this over with". I promised myself that I would exercise hard each day and go to work each day.
March 11 - 14. These were truely the worst days, I knew this from before, but REALLY THOUGHT that it would not be the same because it was "only" codeine. What was actually happening was, I was not EVEN close to be completing the withdrawal from OXY and then I just masked it with the codeine. The Opiate receptors DONT CARE, they just thought I was using again. They were right. Around the 14th I started to feel much better, but I still had some crappy moments. I exercised each afternoon and it would help, but it would come right back after a few hours. I was able to start sleeping through the night (with help of 1 benzo and melatonin) around 13th.
March 15th. today. I have finally got out of the cloud. The demon let me go a bit. Felt good pretty much all day, but i am not taking anything for granted. No alcohol in the house and no opiates. I will try and use the melatonin ONLY tonight and pray for the best. I take the pills when I get tired then I just READ READ READ until I can keep my eyes open anymore. That has worked for a few nights.
So, looking back I cant believe its been close to 1 month that this has gone on. I have made some serious mistakes and lied only to myself and hurt myself along the way. This time is really different. OXY is NASTY stuff and I can really say that I would say NO ----NO MATTER what next time. This stuff is so much different than hydro. Just seems to stick to you, I have read that SUBOXONE is like that and even worse.
NA starts once again-tomorrow night. I am nervous and excited to see old frienRAB and meet new ones.
I hope that this helps people in the process right now. We all are different, but alike in so many ways.
Stay clean......
D
Feb 22 --last day of abuse. I was using an 80MG plus a few Norcos at the time and starting around 10am -12pm each day.
Feb 23- went to the Drs and told him everything, he put me on a TAPER PLAN with 10mg oxy pills. Of course, if you know me, I always chicken out on COLD TURKEY (CT) and try and taper, but it never works. I had 42 pills to go 6 -6-5-5-4-4-3-3-2-2-1-1-1-1 (something like that). 6 pills ! that was great for the first days, then 5 was fine, but 4 sucked so, I cheated and took more, each night, then abused more and justified this by saying that I would just go CT on the weekend! Addict talking.
Feb 28th - pretty much ran out of pills that weekend. Went into some SERIOUS WD. Nothing like before, still not ER stuff, but bad. I had some benzo to help out but it really did nothing. I was suppose to go on a business trip on March 5th, so I thought (from past experiences with hydro) that 5-6 days after CT I would be OK. BOY WAS I WRONG.
March 3rd. I panicked. I was NOT feeling well. I had to call in both MONDAY and TUESDAY and I was NOT feeling better. I made a phone call to my "other" DR and got a script for Tylenol 3's. ps. I turned down hydro. I figured this would get me through the 5 days on the road and also the OXY WD's would be gone and WD from codeine is cake --RIGHT!! read on.....
Well, That night I abused the codeine, OF COURSE. Took like 7 of them. Dummy. and felt great. had an amazing day the next day and life was good. Look back at my post, I was happy again, but only fooling myself.
March 5th. Once the trip started, I got serious about the pills, knowing that I was only hurting myself. Each day i would wait as long as I could to take ONE PILL. I made it to about 2-3 oclock each day, but the scary thing was THAT DID NOT CHANGE. Around the 4 day into my trip I was still needing 2-3 pills to JUST GET BY. I was still not nervous, because I felt that the OXY WD were gone and i was only going to experience the WD from the codeine which at the amount I was taking 2-3 a day would be CAKE --YA RIGHT --read on.........
This brings me to MARCH 10th --Day 1 completely clean. No codeine since 9th at 5:00. Once the afternoon came, I knew I was in big trouble. WD symptoms were horrible and I felt like I was right back to stage one. Very frustrated I said, "strap em up D, its time to get this over with". I promised myself that I would exercise hard each day and go to work each day.
March 11 - 14. These were truely the worst days, I knew this from before, but REALLY THOUGHT that it would not be the same because it was "only" codeine. What was actually happening was, I was not EVEN close to be completing the withdrawal from OXY and then I just masked it with the codeine. The Opiate receptors DONT CARE, they just thought I was using again. They were right. Around the 14th I started to feel much better, but I still had some crappy moments. I exercised each afternoon and it would help, but it would come right back after a few hours. I was able to start sleeping through the night (with help of 1 benzo and melatonin) around 13th.
March 15th. today. I have finally got out of the cloud. The demon let me go a bit. Felt good pretty much all day, but i am not taking anything for granted. No alcohol in the house and no opiates. I will try and use the melatonin ONLY tonight and pray for the best. I take the pills when I get tired then I just READ READ READ until I can keep my eyes open anymore. That has worked for a few nights.
So, looking back I cant believe its been close to 1 month that this has gone on. I have made some serious mistakes and lied only to myself and hurt myself along the way. This time is really different. OXY is NASTY stuff and I can really say that I would say NO ----NO MATTER what next time. This stuff is so much different than hydro. Just seems to stick to you, I have read that SUBOXONE is like that and even worse.
NA starts once again-tomorrow night. I am nervous and excited to see old frienRAB and meet new ones.
I hope that this helps people in the process right now. We all are different, but alike in so many ways.
Stay clean......
D