Rape

E

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My friend (who goes to school here with me) and her roomate went to an upper classman party last night. Her roomate who I'll call A got totally wasted. A and a guy went into the bedroom and the guy locked the door. Shortly after, my friend (we'll call H) heard A screaming. H tried to get in but she couldn't. She got some guys to try to break the door open but they couldn't get it. So they left and came back a little bit later. The door was still locked and A was still inside with the guy. H pounded on the door again shouting to let her in or she'd call the cops. The door opened and there's A drunk and raped. Now A thinks she could be pregnant and wants to get the day after pill but they'd have to go to urgent care to get it cuz everything else is closed.

I feel bad cuz H feels like she has some responsibility to take care of A cuz they're roomates. But then again, A got drunk even after H said they should leave and took A's drink away. A was flirting with a bunch of people cuz she wanted their drinks. Now A doesn't even remember what happened last night other than finding her underware in her jeans this morning.
 
i think the morning after pill is effective in a 72 hr window.. i'm not sure but it's worth looking into.. she might be able to take it tuesday and it still works..
 
yeah, rapists are fucking retarded assholes who can't find anyone that wants to have sex with them... how do you press charges if you don't remember what happened?
 
Your friend H can file a complaint. There's enough there to press the issue at the very least.

The worst thing that you can do is to wait. The longer A or H waits, the less likely the cops will be able to do anything about it.
 
yeah. A doesn't want to press charges cuz she doesn't even remember who the guy was and she's just too embarassed. I know it's a poor excuse, but I can't make her press charges. It's just a sad situation.
 
She should still press charges. At least the police can look into it. Maybe find out who was in the party and if anyone has any information. She may not remember who did this to her but someone there might know. It'll at least be on record. That way if somethign happens again to someone else, they might be able to catch the guy doing this again.

She was intoxicated and did not have consent. She needs to get through that theory that just because she was drunk and doesn't remember that it's just as well. She needs to get through the embarassment because this happens to so many people. She lost that control and I'm sure that was humiliating enough that she let it happen. but Since she was drunk, she lost the ability to give a consent even if she did enjoy it (which I doubt). I'm sure she's upset and confused, but she needs to do this now while it's fresh. Unfortuneately I assume she bathed by now but had she gone directly to the police they'd have done a rape kit and gotten this guy's dna for their records. If there is any chance she didn't clean her undies or pants since that event, she should at least try to submit those into record with the police so they can try to get somethign off this guy. Even let them try to get stuff off her finger nails. Who knows. but it's not too late to report this.

I know a friend who was raped...by her boyfriend..go figure. She figured she shouldn't bother pressing charges against him because she was dating him. She became very disturbed and got an extremely poor view of herself...like she deserved getting raped because she was going out with him for over three months by that time. She ended up sleeping with just about everyone and cheated on her then boyfriends because she thought she was worthless so why not just get through with it.

Anyhow, It's important she does file some charges or at least a complaint. Maybe even talk to a professional just to get some held in emotions that she may assume she's got control over. This is no easy thing to get through and she needs a friend right now.
 
This embarrasment she feels over the issue is ridiculous and you should slap some sense into her, she is not responsible for this as Bitch said. Bitch said much of what I was going to say, but if it's too late for the morning after pill then I suggest abortion.

Don't go off saying "it's immoral, blah, blah, blah," because if that kid grows up he'll say "I should find out who my mom is!" and go looking for her. If he/she does indeed find her he/she'll find out that he is a child of rape and will eventually kill him/herself, it is inevitable and both will be better off.
 
ok, H and A went to urgent care. Turns out that even though A is having her monthly her pill should still keep her from getting pregnant from the event. (According to the doctor who saw her.) And they said that they coulnd't do a test for STD's for another two weeks. So in two weeks we're going to take A to planned parenthood for her test. We'll see how this all panns out.
 
I don't think you have any idea. How do you know? Maybe it is embarrasing, because she feels somewhat responsible. She did have the drinks, she did get into the room with the guy. Simply slapping her is stupid. Comfort and support should be your arguement, because thats clearly what she needs.

As for the abortion issue, which is TOTALLY a separate subject in its own right, should be supported in cases like this.
 
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