I've recently noticed that I've been on "edge," jittery, depressed looking, or I always look like I'm worried about something. Then some people have mentioned things here and there and I really haven't paid any attention to them in particular until recently.
I've lived in a pretty stressful environment for a majority of my life, between three younger siblings, my parents chaotic marriage (cheating, fights, and a very bad divorce), and several deaths that have happened over the past couple of years.
I took a couple of steps to kind of try to calm myself down: I switched from listening to rock/metal/alternative music to listening to classical music (to the point where it's all I listen to), I also started doing Tai Chi for a short period of time, Yoga, walking/running. I play a couple of instruments (French Horn and Trumpet) and I use those as ways of calming myself down.
The only problem is that they didn't work, there are still perioRAB where I become overwhelmed, frustrated, and even have what I call "meltdowns" where I just freak out. So I took to listening to music a lot and interacting with my family when I felt like I was in control and when I felt like I wasn't, I would go up to my room and engross myself in a book or music and just meditate/sleep.
I went to college thinking that by living on campus, by myself that I would get away from the stress and that I would feel better mentally and physically. That I would calm down and finally feel better.
The stress was gone but I still constantly felt tense, stressed, on edge, and at some points overwhelmed completely for no reason. I can't describe it, but it's just like a rush of worry, stress, anxiety, and frustration for no reason whatsoever. I tried to pinpoint what it was and I came up with nothing. There are also perioRAB where I just all the sudden get light-headed and just want to cry or scream for no reason.
I've also had one or two cases where suddenly I get a screaming headache, I become sensitive to light, light headed, nauseous, trerabling, and I could have swore that I was going to die. Once again, like everything else, it just suddenly happened out of the blue.
I've also noticed that I've increasingly started to sleep more and more over the past year and I haven't felt "well-rested" for quite a while. I thought it was that I was consuming too much soft drinks/coffee, so I decided for a month to not drink coke (switched to unsweet tea and powerade/gatorade) and hot green tea in the morning with chai tea and other assorted teas (such as earl grey, morning tea, and other assorted flavored teas throughout the day; all of them were without sugar.) Except that I still felt tired and unrested though I would feel better around late afternoon and early evening. I don't know if this is related to anxiety or if it's a whole other issue altogether, but I felt like it's important to mention nonetheless.
I've also noticed that this past years I can go a day or two without eating then all of the sudden become extremely hungry. These are sporadic and don't happen frequently, but once again, I feel like I should mention it. I also feel like I have "knots" in my stomach frequently like I'm nervous about something, when there's clearly nothing to be worried or nervous about.
They've also started happening more frequently, like the previous ones were small and scattered with maybe one or two "meltdowns" a year, but suddenly within the past years the small ones have started happening more frequently with more "meltdowns" happening that it's really starting to become a noticeable problem for me.
I'm a music major (Performance) and I've noticed that within the past couple of months it's becoming increasingly difficult for me to continue to play the Horn and I'm starting to think that because of either Anxiety or something else that it's starting to leak into my playing and causing issues with my playing.
I don't know if this is Anxiety, or if it's Anxiety paired with other things or what, but looking at the symptoms this is what I think it's the closest to if anything. I'm just looking for some insight because I'm starting to become tired and frustrated with being this way. I feel broken and crazy at perioRAB because I really don't know what is going on with me.
I just thought I would post here and get some advice, feedback, anything before I decided to go to the doctor in case that it's something else.
Also, how would I approach a doctor about this? Should I go to a general practitioner and get a referral or should I go to a specialist?
Thanks for taking the time to read this and respond,
Zephyrus
I've lived in a pretty stressful environment for a majority of my life, between three younger siblings, my parents chaotic marriage (cheating, fights, and a very bad divorce), and several deaths that have happened over the past couple of years.
I took a couple of steps to kind of try to calm myself down: I switched from listening to rock/metal/alternative music to listening to classical music (to the point where it's all I listen to), I also started doing Tai Chi for a short period of time, Yoga, walking/running. I play a couple of instruments (French Horn and Trumpet) and I use those as ways of calming myself down.
The only problem is that they didn't work, there are still perioRAB where I become overwhelmed, frustrated, and even have what I call "meltdowns" where I just freak out. So I took to listening to music a lot and interacting with my family when I felt like I was in control and when I felt like I wasn't, I would go up to my room and engross myself in a book or music and just meditate/sleep.
I went to college thinking that by living on campus, by myself that I would get away from the stress and that I would feel better mentally and physically. That I would calm down and finally feel better.
The stress was gone but I still constantly felt tense, stressed, on edge, and at some points overwhelmed completely for no reason. I can't describe it, but it's just like a rush of worry, stress, anxiety, and frustration for no reason whatsoever. I tried to pinpoint what it was and I came up with nothing. There are also perioRAB where I just all the sudden get light-headed and just want to cry or scream for no reason.
I've also had one or two cases where suddenly I get a screaming headache, I become sensitive to light, light headed, nauseous, trerabling, and I could have swore that I was going to die. Once again, like everything else, it just suddenly happened out of the blue.
I've also noticed that I've increasingly started to sleep more and more over the past year and I haven't felt "well-rested" for quite a while. I thought it was that I was consuming too much soft drinks/coffee, so I decided for a month to not drink coke (switched to unsweet tea and powerade/gatorade) and hot green tea in the morning with chai tea and other assorted teas (such as earl grey, morning tea, and other assorted flavored teas throughout the day; all of them were without sugar.) Except that I still felt tired and unrested though I would feel better around late afternoon and early evening. I don't know if this is related to anxiety or if it's a whole other issue altogether, but I felt like it's important to mention nonetheless.
I've also noticed that this past years I can go a day or two without eating then all of the sudden become extremely hungry. These are sporadic and don't happen frequently, but once again, I feel like I should mention it. I also feel like I have "knots" in my stomach frequently like I'm nervous about something, when there's clearly nothing to be worried or nervous about.
They've also started happening more frequently, like the previous ones were small and scattered with maybe one or two "meltdowns" a year, but suddenly within the past years the small ones have started happening more frequently with more "meltdowns" happening that it's really starting to become a noticeable problem for me.
I'm a music major (Performance) and I've noticed that within the past couple of months it's becoming increasingly difficult for me to continue to play the Horn and I'm starting to think that because of either Anxiety or something else that it's starting to leak into my playing and causing issues with my playing.
I don't know if this is Anxiety, or if it's Anxiety paired with other things or what, but looking at the symptoms this is what I think it's the closest to if anything. I'm just looking for some insight because I'm starting to become tired and frustrated with being this way. I feel broken and crazy at perioRAB because I really don't know what is going on with me.
I just thought I would post here and get some advice, feedback, anything before I decided to go to the doctor in case that it's something else.
Also, how would I approach a doctor about this? Should I go to a general practitioner and get a referral or should I go to a specialist?
Thanks for taking the time to read this and respond,
Zephyrus