Play-by-Play

  • Thread starter Thread starter milksnake
  • Start date Start date
Hopefully you're sleeping by now, so maybe this will help for tomorrow. Today was my first day with nothing, and while it was tough, two things really helped me along.

The first was a phone call from a friend I hadn't talked to in a while. I didn't disclose to her what was going on. It allowed me to sort of immerse myself in something completely different and concentrate on someone else rather than the way I was feeling.

The second thing (and I know this is going to sound incredibly weird and go against your masculine sensibilities, but bear with me...) was OTC PMS medicine. It doesn't turn you into a woman - I swear! ;) What it has, though, is some acetaminophen for the aches, and an absolutely ridiculous amount of caffeine. Read the label and make sure you're getting one with caffeine. I took it once at bedtime a few months ago and was awake all night long. When I read the label the next morning, I discovered it had about three times the amount of caffeine as an energy drink! So while I felt a little jittery today from it (make sure to take it with some food), it was a tremendous relief from that horrid lethargy. It was a GoRABend. It seems like your spouse is being really supportive (as is mine) - you can send her to the store to buy it so you don't have to take a box of Midol up to the register. :)

Good luck to you and congratulations on the amazing milestones you've already conquered!

Holly
 
day 2, 7:50am......... last night i rolled around alot...slept here and there...cussed alot. this morning the stomach is really bad. havin to walk bent over. took a bunch more Levsin about 10 min ago...maybe that will ease up the pain. not really having any aches and pains in the joints as of yet. actually, only two things messin with me......weakness, and stomach pain. strange tho....this is nothing like it was years ago. i remeraber not being able to even get out of bed the first few days. could be the amount of time i was taking the drug, and the amount. for those of you what don't know, in feb., i had a hip replacement. that's when i got re-addicted to this stuff. i had been clean from it for 12 years before the surgery. now, back when, i was on oxy for at least 13 years and taking very large doses. when i kicked back then, it was pure hel* so i'm thinking this time around i was only on it about a month or so, at lower doses so it aint gonna beat the he** outta me. Then again, its only day 2. however, the paranoia even seems to be easing up too. i dont know, these withdrawals are tricky, sometimes fool ya.......time will tell i guess

thank you folks for bein here.........
 
day 5..3:20pm

like holly...a few w/d come backs...nothing terrible...
however this is expected so i aint gonna worry about it. sheesh...5 days, no lookin back now....

oh yeah, i DID try a cigarette after a long time quit.....guess i was lookin for any kind of rush..sheesh,..darn near wrecked my truck hakkin so bad..had to pull over. what an idiot.. hahahaha

better days.........
 
good for you looks like your biggest battle will be over soon . just dont forget how it made you feel . an you may battle all your life . but fight the good fight not the one that kills us .ya im 250 lbs 6ft5 an have worked with people that took 3to 400 a day. if i did not know what i know i would probley still take them not noing .remeraber when 10 was great then more more more more . i have to stop here . 20 mgs a day i could feel an still can feel it trying to suck me in. i dont take 1 of anything size does not matter drugs an alcohol dont disrciminate. pot too will lead us back to the drug of choice you know that .i took it at night only so ya it wants me to use it around the clock . i cant funtion to well on percs:wave:scott:dizzy:
 
Sorry to laugh at your near- car crash, but ... I did the SAME THING! I totally lit up a cigarette today because I was being driven nuts by that feeling of wanting something. Aside from tasting so much worse than I remeraber, I paid for those two drags with a couple hours of nausea afterward. Blech. Hahahaha!

Well, here's to a little less "I'm clean!" euphoria, and a little more working at just being regular, happy, healthy people. We are on our way! I'm super proud of you and grateful for your "company" over these past days.

Holly
 
Hi Milksnake

Sorry you are suffering so in withdrawal. The first days of my own withdrawal from Oxycodone were nearly unbearable. The anxiety and mental garbage were horrible, just horrible. Seems like a lifetime ago, but is not something I will forget. I, too, walked around the house continuuosly and aimlessly. I took 6, 7, 8 baths a day to try and make time pass. I was talking to myself and wondering if I would live through it all.

As the days went by, I knew something had to change or I was not going to make it. I thought there vwas no fight left in me, but I dug really deep and found some afterall. I used it to help me change the way I was thinking about withdrawal. I began to look at each rotten symptom of withdrawal as a symptom of healing. Each symptom I endured became a moment of healing for my mind and body. I began to find a sense of accomplishment in my ability to endure. I wasn't successful each and every time, but certainly many more times than not. I worked to take the emotion out of the withdrawal and to view it all as a process. I continued to talk to myself... but now I told myself things like reminding myself to breathe slowly and concentrate on it to help an anxiety attack pass. I kept gathering tools to help myself... little coping tricks. When I found myself aimlessly moving, I instead made myself dance. I concentrated on dancing and my mind would find a little peace.

I hope you discover lots of little coping mechanisms. Write them down.. log them and read them to help direct yourself when it all starts coming on. You are in the miRABt of a process of restoration and it does have a beginning, a middle and an end. The restoration comes.

Peace
reach
 
Well, I am so proud of you! Day 7 YEEEHHHHAAAA!!!! Great job.

I am not going to comment about the user name things because if I am thinking is true.. It's best just to keep my trap shut! hahaha Each to their own!

You just keep doing what you are doing friend and you are going to kick the crap out of this addiction.

I love your play by play idea! Keep it going. I think it will help many others which is what you intended on it doing in the first place and for me as you can tell.. Posting helps me big time!!! I swear some people must log on and see all my posts and think "does this woman not have a life?" but... it's a good coping tool for me and it's been workting thus far.

You take care and be careful in Mexico if you go!

Keep us posted!
 
12:49pm..........wow, what a difference from my last post. alot worse...chest tighting up, loss of breath...stomach cramping up pretty good...Levsin not working as good...very weak. and now, the parinoia is starting. i hate this part. caint explain it...just scared of everything and all situations....yes indeed, it's startin ta hit. hang on, long ride home...... want to cry but caint figure out why.....(thats not a song quote admin, thats my own) up and down in the bed.... comfortable a few seconRAB..... then back up wondering where to go next.....nothing to do about this....theres absolutely nothing i can do. hold on to something...what? sheesh.... a feeling of complete helplessness. walk around the house aimlessly... muttering worRAB that aint makin a whole lot of sense...... telling myself whats going on and why.... i walk over to the mrs., hug her and tell her i love her. she smiles, hugs me back...."I'm here baby, hang on, we'll get to the other side" she reminRAB me of years back when we went thru this and how that ended in happiness. God I love her so much.
I'm sitting her typing bent over the keyboard, a wet rag on my head. I'm hot. seems someone is tighting the imaginary belt around my chest. i get up, take a deep breath and try to hold it but caint. sit back down, lean over and type some more. then i'm cold....put a blanket around me and shiver. thinking about the next few days aint helpin nuthin but yet i keep doing it. why? i want a cigarette but i quit 3 months ago. would it help? don't know. i'm just lookin for some kind of high, thats all. throwing the blanket off as i tingle all over and start to sweat. man, this sucks canal water......

don't know when the next post will be..........could be in a hr, 5hr, never
 
had a death in the family....haven't been posting...Anyway, ------

Day 16.... it's a done deal.... no w/d symptoms what-so-ever...feel like a million
 
milksnake,

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. This is a tough time for you so I want to say this gently...

Be careful. This is what all addicts are afraid of. Something bad happening so early in recovery can push us to relapse. Be sure to talk talk talk, especially if you have thoughts of using. If you go to NA meetings, tell the group about your loss. If you just have family and frienRAB (no NA), talk to them. It's important to protect yourself, as this is one of those times you MAY turn to your drug of choice.

Congratulations on day 16!! That is wonderful. No w/d symptoms? That is amazing. Feel like a million? That is unbelievable! I'm very happy for you.

Sending sympathy your way...to you and your family...

emsmom
 
hi there
i am going thru the same thing. took my last norco yesterday and today feels simply awful. but we can do this thing. one minute at a time for me today. you hang in there, i'll hang in there with you as all of us are. hugs and prayers,
gypsyboots
remeraber, we just have to get thru this day.:angel:
 
dreamingoutloud,

This thread is for addressing the concerns of milksnake.

I have moved your post to another thread:
"When do I start feeling normal?"
 
Hey sweets...sorry I missed the start of your party. SounRAB like its all starting to kick in good and proper. You know the dog...go out and take aim. Remeraber what you get 100pts for? Yep...aim low!!!
Mate...I so am with you right now. I know that it sucks BIG TIME but your're doing it. Your wife is right beside you cheering you on and we're here also. Keep posting if you can...it will help. You're doing awesome....wish I could be there to help. Come on me mate...you can do this. Will mail you in morn to see whats up. Has your pm feature gone MIA too? I cant use mine?!
Get as much rest as possible and eat/drink what you can.
Thinking of you my friend,
love...CC XX
 
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