Official Big News Thread

In other big news...

My sister who has been married for 8 years and has never been able to conceive, has managed to get up the skite with the aid of IVF. No, that's not some sort of N Irish paramilitary organisation.

Not only is she up the skite, she is up the skite with twins. She came round to my house yesterday and she was delirious with joy.

Good old NHS. Not only do they save lives, they help create them.

Big aww, everybody.
 
chalice said:
In other big news...

My sister who has been married for 8 years and has never been able to conceive, has managed to get up the skite with the aid of IVF. No, that's not some sort of N Irish paramilitary organisation.

Not only is she up the skite, she is up the skite with twins. She came round to my house yesterday and she was delirious with joy.

Good old NHS. Not only do they save lives, they help create them.

Big aww, everybody.
Click to expand...
So Uncle chalice is it now ? Congratulations old man :lol:
 
Oh well done!

I hate supermarkets. I always have to go on my own because Cheese hates them more than I do. He goes pale and sweaty at the thought of them and holds onto the trolly like a little kid moaning and pointing at sweets.

I just get an immense and all-encompassing hatred of other shoppers and utter violent trolly-rage.
 
There's a 24 hour ASDA quite near to us and I have oft time contemplated going there to avoid the cunts shopping. Supermarkets seem to bring out the rude in people.

And also, look in the direction you are pushing your fucking trolley, not over your fucking shoulder. Cunt.
 
Mr JP Fugley said:
There's a 24 hour ASDA quite near to us and I have oft time contemplated going there to avoid the cunts shopping. Supermarkets seem to bring out the rude in people.

And also, look in the direction you are pushing your fucking trolley, not over your fucking shoulder. Cunt.
Click to expand...

I used to go to the 24 hour Tesco at 2 in the morning. It was brilliant.

Also, don't fucking stop in the middle of the aisle with your huge brood of misbehaving snotty nosed kids and your fat ass acting as a barrier whilst you have a chat.

He's good thanks. Is currently killing wargs.
 
:lol: :earl:

Are you infested with wargs, you have my sympathy.

And double also, don't stop in the fucking door on the way out, to light a cigarette. You're blocking my passage (ooer) and forcing your fag on me (double ooer)
 
Mr JP Fugley said:
:lol: :earl:

Are you infested with wargs, you have my sympathy.

And double also, don't stop in the fucking door on the way out, to light a cigarette. You're blocking my passage (ooer) and forcing your fag on me (double ooer)
Click to expand...

Agreed. I think I've mentioned before that exits are meant for exiting, not stopping just outside the door. Tesco metro is a prime example of this. Tesco metro is also the bane of my life for the stupid self-service till thingies. "unidentified object in the bagging area" "ITS THE SHOPPING I JUST BOUGHT,YOU CUNT" "Please wait for assistance""I NEED TO GET TO WORK! THERE IS NO ASSISTANCE" and the way that it always spits your notes out about five times before they accept them. NYYYARRRGHH.

:angry::angry::angry::angry::angry::angry::angry::angry::angry:
 
I find the ASDA version quite efficient and there is normally an assistant there to provide said assistance.

What are these "notes" of which you speak btw.
 
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