I have been with my boyfriend for over a year. We have never been able to have 'real' sex. We both weigh over 200lbs, so unfortunately his tummy sticks out further than his penis which means he can't get in me missionary style. I haven't suggested getting on my hands and knees, because my weight is in my butt and hips so he probably couldn't reach that way either. The only thing we have been successful in is I, according to him, give the most amazing head. Unfortunately, he is horrible at going down on a girl and can't get it right even when I tell him what to do. I am reduced to letting him use his hand on me and just deal with it or else not get anything.
It's very frustrating, and I have gotten to the point where I get angry when he asks for head because I think he's getting a way better deal than I am. I haven't given him one in a few months, because I'm so frustrated and angry about it.
I just want to have sex, I would even go so far as to say I need it, my body is to the point that I'm experiencing physical pain in my vagina from wanting to be -sorry for this- penetrated. The only thing left to try is for me to be on top, and as silly as it sounds, I'm too scared for that. I don't know how to initiate it, I wouldn't have the guts to crawl on top, and I don't know what to do once I'm up there. Plus, I am very sexually inexperienced, so I'm very small. Will it hurt to be on top?
I don't like making my private issues public, but after over a year of this I don't know what else to do.
Please help!
PS, I'm not leaving my boyfriend or cheating on him. Even though we both have issues and faults, we love each other too much for that.
It's very frustrating, and I have gotten to the point where I get angry when he asks for head because I think he's getting a way better deal than I am. I haven't given him one in a few months, because I'm so frustrated and angry about it.
I just want to have sex, I would even go so far as to say I need it, my body is to the point that I'm experiencing physical pain in my vagina from wanting to be -sorry for this- penetrated. The only thing left to try is for me to be on top, and as silly as it sounds, I'm too scared for that. I don't know how to initiate it, I wouldn't have the guts to crawl on top, and I don't know what to do once I'm up there. Plus, I am very sexually inexperienced, so I'm very small. Will it hurt to be on top?
I don't like making my private issues public, but after over a year of this I don't know what else to do.
Please help!
PS, I'm not leaving my boyfriend or cheating on him. Even though we both have issues and faults, we love each other too much for that.