No One Matters Until They're Dead

M

mamadot

New member
Yeah i stole the line from a fugazi song big deal wanna fight about it?

please keep in mind im no poet, im atempting, so rip it apart, but do it nicely if you ca for my ego's sake.



Little mice
each their own experiment
In a Lab where similarity's abundant

look at them go

Some are born poor
Others live with privilege
that few accept and
most refuse to acknowledge

In their tubes
running revolutions
always finding more problems than solutions

some are very passive
others like to argue
The scientist asks
"Which one are you?"

Mice go to war
Mice join the peace corp (core)
either way they end up as a little mouse corpse

No one matters, until they're dead


(part i havent written yet)
 
Your ego speaks volumes. The want to be remarkable, lasting, and free outside of the experiment. As concise as need be, and I like it.
 
i wouldnt like the scientist to be god for some reason, but the more i think about it, the more it seems to be...other times i think it's me asking the listener the question.


Thanks for the comments guys :)
 
yes god seems to assume the position of a collective unknowing. Instead of endlessly question or imagine this emptiness people would rather say GOD!
 
i have nothing wrong with a word that means the indescribable/unknown. It's when people try to describe the indescribable that they really **** up.
 
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