A
Anthony
Guest
I've read many things about closet gays in this, so i mainly made this account to talk to someone and seek advice, I'm too repressed. I'm a 17 year old kid, and I've lived a normal happy life until since like i turned 16, I have an attraction to older men, and i would always tell myself it would leave after like middle school or something. I have alot of good friends and I'm in the xc team for my school. When i realized im like this forever like in 8th grade, I thought i was bi, cuz i liked girls and had a girlfriend. But i barely did anything with her, When i was in 9th grade and i would b at some parties i liked dancing with girls and evryhthing, but in my sophomore year is when i realized I couldnt get a boner with a girl, and it hit me hard like my Main thing in life is to have a family, and have children, I love kids and would love to be a father. Know im talking to dis oder girl and we hav ahd times together and like when it comes to sexual attraction i like it for a lil, its ver very hard to get a hard on so i start thinnking gay thoughts to b able to hav sex, but something alwasy happens so im still a virgin. I'm a smart kid, I've actually had a hard life, but nothing gets me down I'm always happy and help other people and even though i have problems with family and alot of things I alwasy look at the good side, but the last few weeks im being way to depressed, I think i cant have a "normal" life, i kno alot would say im gay and just should live my life like that but i cant, im only attracted to older men, also its impossibel for me it's wierd i wouldnt accept myself idk, srry for the misspelling and thank you if you read this whole thing and gave me any advice =]