she let out a groan? and i though it was because she was in pain so i asked her if she was o.k. She got upset and said to me "I'm fine, it feels good...you're ruining it". So then i told her "YOU'RE ruining it", and she got more mad at me. Why was it o.k. for her to tell me i'm ruining it, but not o.k. for me to tell her she's ruining it?