my son was physically abused by my ex

[Natasha&Jose]

Earlier this year i came home from school and my ex (who had been layed off for two years and was staying home wit our children) was out side waiting for me to get home. He quickly started to explain (not telling the truth) why my son had bruises on his face ( he had just turned three). I immdiatly thought he was my boyfriend who created the bruises it looked like hand prints on mysons face. I had cps invovled and tey agreed with me. He took a polygraph test and finally admitted to loosing his temper and slapping him multipul times. (he had never done anything like this before) I did not speak with him for a while. He had got himself into anger management and parenting classes with out it yet being mandated. I began to speak to him and his councler and was prety quick to starting to believe he truely is sorry and is sincerely trying to be a better man. Now i have been seeing him again and cant decided if i am being a terrible mom or if i am working on what could be something great. I had the no contact removed with him and my children. He was not senteneced to jail time i was surprised about this but h is councler truely feels this is not going to help him and that he will be betteroff continuing councling. Is it a good thing to work on this relationship. My son is not affraid of him and we do tell him that what his dad did was not ok or am i just being another stupid mom who is blinded by her man??? somebody please give me an honest opinion my family hates me for talking with him and i understand but a lot of our friends and his side of the family feel the same way i do. WHAT SHOULD I DO!!!!

 

[C-C]

The honest truth is that you should put your son's well being ahead of anything you might think can come out of this relationship.

Usually, once an abuser always an abuser. It will only get worse for your son and for yourself.

You are your son's protector.

 

[bluescluesluver]

It sounds to me like you did everything right up to this point- you took every step to protect your child. To his credit, your ex seems to have taken some very important steps also, with the counseling and the parenting classes. From here, I'm not sure. I do think the child's welfare is first and foremost. I also think that good people sometimes do bad things, or go too far. There were times my mom got a little too heavy handed with me and the State would call it abuse now, and yet I don't feel as though I was abused and I love my Mom. So I think it's got to be your judgment call on this, but I hope should anything ever happen like that again that there would not be a 3rd chance.

Good luck. You're in a really tough spot, I know.