My son recently came out and I got into an argue with my wife about something that I

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need help with? My 19 year old son recently came out this year. When referring to my son to my peers and family I still call him by the f-word but in an endearing way like "this my son, the little f____ over there." My wife got on my case about calling my son by the f-word and said I should call him after. I wanted a homosexual person's opinion. When referring to my son's homosexuality what should I say? I am sorry for my ignorance, but I don't have much exposure to political correctness in my area as we live in rural area. Thank you for the advice in advance.
 
How endearing would it be if your son introduced you to people by saying 'this is my father the @zzhole' ? no matter how endearingly you say it it's not kind or flattering. Why do you find it necessary to include your son's sexual orientation when referring to him?
 
I've just read what you've said and although it's not intential it comes across VERY homophobic! I know it wasn't intential and I applaud you for accepting your sons sexuality and only wish there could be more men out there like you so very well done :)

As for the comment I can see where both you and your wife are coming from :) While in your eyes and head this is your way of showing affection to your son the word faggot is used by ALOT of people to insult and demoralize gay people. It's not your fault because odds are you didn't know but just bear that in mind :) You wife on the other hand is obviously taking it in an offensive way (the way alot of people would) but I'm very glad you haven't taken offense to this.

I would however recommend you speak to your son about this. I don't know him so i've no idea how he'll react but if you can get him to listen to you just explain that you don't know very much about homosexuality and you mean absolutly no offense in calling him "faggot". From here you can ask him how he feels about you using it and if he does take it offensively suggest to him how he would you to be addressed to by familiy and friends. If you can work together on this one it'd be wonderful :) Remind him that you love him and how proud you are of him....if your not an emotional person just tell him that you're there for him if he needs you and leave it at that :)

Anyway, there's alot there but I hope I helped and I wish you the very best of luck :)
 
As the 'f' word is considered demeaning, I would suggest you stop using it. If you cannot figure it out any other way, think of something you are associated with, then think of a heartless, mean spirited, hateful word for that association and introduce yourself to others by saying, "Hi. My name is 'XYZ', and I have a tiny penis". You've immediately WARNED the other person about 'your' shortcomings. Being gay is simply a persons sexual orientation. It is NOT bad. It is not abnormal. It, simply, is what it is. When you make being gay something it isn't, 'you' are the one who's advertising your 'shortcomings'...STOP IT!
 
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